I'm With You
by skeletoninme
Summary: Caitlin Evans, the outcast, is suddenly in love with one of the most popular boys in school, Aaron Sanchezz, and you know what? He loves her back. Follow Caitlin and Aaron through many ups and downs that you would have never seen coming. READ OR DIE. DX
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

So cut my wrists and black my eyes, so I can fall asleep tonight, and die. Because you —

My music abruptly stopped when I ran into Aaron Sanchezz, the most popular jock in the whole school.

"God, freak. Watch where you're going," he said snarkily. I had the faint urge to punch him in the face. Okay, maybe larger than faint.

"Why don't you, football-for-brains?" I snapped back, bending down to pick up my iPod and binder.

"What did you say, emo?" My eyebrow twitched.

I stood up and looked up into his eyes, which was slightly distracting, considering the shade of brown/gold they were. "Didn't hear me? I said, "Why don't you, football-for-brains?"

He glared and opened his mouth to reply, when I brought my Chuck Taylor down on his foot, and turned to stalk away, but not before shouting, "Asshole!" over my shoulder.

God. The nerve of some people. And to call me an emo?! I'm not fucking emo. I wear black. Big deal. It pissed me off extremely when people called me emo. I mean, seriously. Emo isn't even a people ! It's a music genre for fuck sake!

My shoulder was jostled as Sanchezz stalked by me, thoroughly making sure I hit the blue locker to my left, and turned the corner. Jackass.

* * *

Sitting in math with literally nothing to do can be the most boring thing you can ever endure, let me tell you. It's more like torture than actual torture. I'd take water boarding over this any day. Seriously.

I sighed and put my head on the desk. I couldn't seem to stop thinking about stupid Aaron Sanchezz, and it was driving me fricking insane. He was a jerk, a jock, and he was on the extreme top of the social ladder, where I am on the last rung, or even possibly underneath it. I was the gum stuck to your shoe, where he was the chocolate pudding at lunch. It wasn't fair.

God, Caitlin. Get a grip. Stop thinking about it. Life isn't fair, and you know it.

Gahh. His eyes were what was bugging me most. That.. I don't know how you even explain that color, for god sakes! It was like a mix of amber, honey, topaz, and light brown. And those lips —

GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF!

I slammed my head into the desk. "Ow."

Mrs. Hockenberry touched my shoulder. "Are you alright, Caitlin?" I looked up at her.

"Yeah. I guess. I just have a headache." That wasn't a complete lie. These damned desks are hard. What are they? Steel painted over with paneling? God.

"Would you like to go to the nurse?" She gave me a sympathetic look.

"Yeah," I replied, reaching for my assignment notebook.

"Just go. You don't need a pass." Mrs. H. smiled at me.

"Thanks." I rubbed my temples. Ugh. I don't think this headache is just from the damn desk.

_ _ _

Damn emo chick. Get out of my head already!

I was walking down the hallway to my locker when the exact same girl I happened to be thinking about turned the corner.

Speak of the she-devil, and she shall appear.

Caitlin — at least, I think that's what her name was. Most people just called her Evans, because of her last name — stopped walking and stood stalk-still when she noticed me. This gave me time to give her a quick once-over without her (hopefully) noticing.

She was about 5'3, with long curly brown hair, and a ring of eyeliner around each eye, which were.. a dark.. Red? (Were they red? Or was the light playing tricks on me? They're usually brown or black.. Not that I pay attention to her eyes, or anything..) Her lips were perfect. Not too big, not too small. And she had an adorable little nose.

As usual, she was wearing black skinny jeans, her rainbow Chuck Taylors, and a hoodie. Today, the hoodie said "RIOT!" Obviously a Paramore hoodie.

"What are you looking at?" she asked, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Nothing. Absolutely nothing."

She frowned. "Thanks, asshole. I know exactly what I'm looking at."

I flinched slightly when she called me asshole. "And what is that?"

"An egotistical player who thinks he's all that just because he's the head something-or-other backer of the school team. You're a fucking player who thinks he can do whatever he wants, just because you can get into girls pants with a blink of your eyes and a bat of your eyelashes." I just blinked. "Here's a word to the wise, Aaron. You can't do anything you want just because you're popular. Seriously. Grab ahold of reality and take it for a ride, why don't you?"

She walked off, leaving me standing in the hallway, with my mouth hanging open.

_ _ _

I passed Caitlin in the hallway one more time that day, and she gave a glare that made the phrase, If looks could kill.. run through my mind..

During lunch, all I could seem to do was stare at damned Caitlin Evans at her little table in the corner.

Luke nudged my shoulder. "Whatchu starin' at?" His eyes followed my line of vision, which I quickly trained on Allyson Brant.

"Nothin'," I said, turning back to my half eaten sandwich.

* * *

Aaron Sanchezz was staring at me, and it was weird. It was making me uneasy and nauseated. I pushed my pizza away, and took a sip of my soda. Stop. Staring. At. Me.

I looked at him from the corner of my eye. He was talking to Luke Conroy, who happened to be another popular jock/player/egotistical chauvinistic pig.

As if they could both read my thoughts, they both looked over at me, which caused me to sink into my chair and look through the rain-splattered window.

The rest of lunch consisted of back-and-forth glances between me and Aaron, and a few from Luke, which was, quite frankly, extremely creepy.

* * *

The next week included awkward glances between me and Aaron, odd, probing questions from everyone, and fights with my mom.. That ended.. with.. Never mind.. Oh, the joys of being sixteen!

I was standing at my locker after school, when I heard voices coming down the hallway. Aaron and Steven.

"So, do you like her? You stare at her all the time. Dude, she's.." Steven trailed off.

"..No. I don't like her. I'm just.. Never mind. Mind your own business." Aaron sounded.. defensive?

"Sure you don't. Whatever, man." I heard a pair of footsteps veer off in another direction.

I bent over and pretended to be looking for something in my bag, when I heard the only set of footsteps stop, and a quiet, "Shit." come from behind me.

I got up with my duffel bag over my shoulder, and shut my locker. I turned slowly to see Aaron standing there.

"How much of that did you happen to hear?" he asked.

"Hear of what?" I asked innocently, unraveling my iPod headphones.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about, Caitlin." He crossed his arms.

"I do not."

"Oh, stop playing dumb."

"Who said I'm playing?" I raised my newly pierced eyebrow.

"Actually, I wouldn't be surprised if you weren't." God, he was a jerk.

"Oh, thank you. You are too kind. Now, if you don't mind, I have somewhere to be."

"Oh, really?" I nodded. "Like where? HotTopic?" Aaron snapped.

"Why yes, actually. I have a date with the skinny jeans section, thank you very much." I turned around and stalked out the school's double doors, and turned the corner, ignoring the shouts of, "Come back!" that were assaulting my ears.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

Why won't she get out of my head? God. I'm tired of thinking about her. About her sad eyes, the snobby way she snaps at me.. GOD. Stop it, Aaron!

My thoughts were interrupted — thank God — by a knock on my bedroom door.

"Come in," I said, turning away from the window.

"Aaron? I brought up your dinner."

My sister Jessica set the tray on my computer desk.

"Thanks," I said, turning back to look out my window.

My bed squeaked as she sat down. "Are you okay? Are you sick?"

"I'm fine," I muttered, looking over at her. "I'm not sick."

"You sure?" She looked worried.

"Jessi, I'm sure." God. She worries too much. Must be where I get it from.

"Okay.. Well.. uhm, let me know if you need anything, alright?" she said, standing up slowly.

"I will. Thanks."

She shut the door, and I pushed the tray away from me.

I noticed someone walking outside through the rain. Someone with black skinny jeans, long brown hair.. and a Paramore hoodie.

The next thing I knew, I was flying down the stairs, grabbing my jacket, and heading out the front door into the rain.

* * *

Everything hurts. My face, my arm. I'm cold. I'm wet.

The rain was pouring, and my hair was plastered to my face. My face was smarting in the cold water from where I had been slapped. My jeans were sticking to my legs, and my hoodie was extremely heavy. I felt like I was gonna pass out.

I could faintly hear what I suspected to be shoes slapping against the wet pavement.

"Caitlin!"

I turned. Oh great. It's Aaron.

_ _ _

As she turned, her eyes widened, which were surrounded by smeared mascara and eyeliner, and her cheek was .. turning purple. I looked at her hand. There was pink water running off of it.

I skidded to a halt in front of her. "You're bleeding. What happened?"

She sniffed. "You wanna know? You really wanna know why I'm bleeding?" I could tell that she was angry. I didn't know why, and I wasn't all that sure if I wanted to know why.

"Yes. I do." I crossed my arms. The rain was coming down in torrents now.

She pulled up her hoodie, and I could see three deep slashes in her arm, which each had ribbons of pink water and blood running out of them. Oh my God.

"You.. but— " Caitlin cut me off.

"Shut up! You gonna go tell all of your "_jock buddies_" how the "_emo girl_" cuts herself and cries in the rain now? And how her mom slaps her around like some punching bag? Or how her dad abused her?" She was starting to shake.

"No.. I wouldn't ever do that." I took a step closer to her. "I promise. I know.. I know what it's like to have a hard life."

"No you don't!" she shouted over the pouring rain, taking a step back. "You are perfect! You have the perfect friends, the perfect popularity! You even get the perfect girlfriends! You have the perfect life!"

I put my hand on her arm—the one that wasn't bleeding—and said, "My life may look perfect, with girls, friends, and popularity, but you don't live in my house. My house is hell on Earth." I could now see the tears that welled over the rims of her eyes, and spilled down her cheeks, tracking her makeup with them, and mingling with the rain.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Caitlin shouted, and flung herself into my arms. Her body racked with sobs, and a clap of thunder rumbled overhead.

She smells like rain, and blood. Blood.. Right.

I grabbed her arm, and pulled her hoodie sleeve around it to help stop the bleeding. She looked up at me. "Thank you.."

I nodded. "No problem."

"I uh.." Caitlin looked down. "I have to go."

"Uh.. Okay. Just.. Promise me something."

"..Yeah? I'm.. I'm not very good on promises." She looked down again.

"Don't hurt yourself, alright?"

"..Okay." She gave a small smile.

"Thank you." I smiled back.

Her hand left mine, and I watched her run off in the rain, leaving me, standing there, dazed and confused.

* * *

I was sitting at lunch, and picking at the bandages on my arm, when the chair across from me slid across the terribly patterned floor, and someone sat down. I looked up and saw none other than Aaron Sanchezz staring at me.

"How is your arm?" he asked quietly, looking at the gauze on it. He'd propped his head up on his hands, which were folded.

I slid my sleeve back down. "It's fine. Uh.. How are you?" This is awkward..

"I'm alright. I could be better." Aaron smiled. "How about you?" His smile is so..

I blinked to clear that train of thought. "I'm good. I guess." I lightly touched the yellowing bruise on my cheek.

What I didn't expect was for Aaron to reach across the table and turn my head so he could get a clear view of it. "Who hit you, by the way?"

I looked at the Formica table and muttered my answer.

"I didn't catch that."

"My mother," I said louder. Aaron lifted my chin so he could look at me, possibly forgetting we were in the lunch room.

"Your mom?" He sounded appalled. "Your mom?"

I nodded. "You make it sound like the mother being the abuser, and not the father.. like.. un-human.," I muttered.

"Anyone hitting you is un-hum—" Aaron stopped talking and looked away. He exhaled, and said, "How many times has this happened?"

"It happens all the time." I slid up my sleeve on my right arm, where there were finger shaped bruises everywhere.

"God. Why ?" I looked up. His eyes were the size of lemons.

"She.. she has.. problems."

"OBVIOUSLY. If she hits you she has major problems. Anyone hitting you is.. Just.. It's not right," he whisper-shouted, clenching his fists. Why is he so.. uptight and angry about this? It's not like it's his fault.. I deserve it anyhow. For.. everything I've done. ..But I guess he has a point. She shouldn't take it out on me when there's what my father did to me.. No.. don't go down this road again. Not in front of him.

_ _ _

She looks like she's going to cry.. I should probably take her out of the lunchroom before she does.

I pushed my chair back, and said, "Come on." Caitlin stood up with tears in her eyes, and took off out of the lunch room. Everyone turned to stare at me like it was my fault. Oh, fuck you all.

I found her sitting outside on a bench under the big oak tree. I sat down next to her. She was crying. Oh, God. Stop crying. Please.

Caitlin turned to me. "Aaron?"

"Yeah ?" I answered.

"C - can we skip the rest of the day ? I.. I wanna tell you some stuff." She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.

"Yeah.. Okay."


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

* * *

How do I tell him all of this? About my mother, and my father, and.. All of that? How? Seriously. He's going to have me committed to a mental insititution!

"Take a left here," I said, telling him the directions to the place I felt most comfortable. It was two days after the night in the rain with Aaron. Apparently he has now moved to my lunch table, it seems.

We pulled up into a grassy meadow.

"Are we in the right place?" Aaron asked quizzically.

"Yes.. This is where I was headed.. that one night. C'mon." I stepped out of the car and inhaled the rain scented forest air. I started walking through the trees, and looked over at Aaron. "How much," he tensed, "do you know about me?" Aaron relaxed.

He was slient for a moment. "I know that you understand pain. And have been through more than I can imagine. I know that you have an abusive mother, and possibly abusive father. I know that you take your anger out on yourself. And that you don't think of yourself as worth anything.." He trailed off and looked at me. I thought I heard a faint mumble after that, but I can't be quite positive.

We reached the bridge. I stood on a rock and hoisted myself up onto it. Aaron followed and sat on the edge with me. The bridge jutted out of the "cliff" above us, so you had to pull yourself up onto it.

"You wanna know why I'm so fucked?" I asked bluntly.

"Yeah. But I wouldn't use the term "fucked." More like.. touched in the head." He grinned that perfect grin.

I smacked his arm. "C'mon. Be serious. I'm fucked. Seriously.. And literally." His eyes widened. "Well.. I guess I'll just come out with it." I sighed. "I'm not a virgin. And I haven't been one since.. Since I don't know when. My father raped me. And when he left, my mother "rented" me out to her boyfriends, to her drug dealers.. to everyone and anyone. I'm amazed I'm not an STD factory by now. I'm amazed that I don't even have one." I couldn't bear to look at his face, and see the look. "I've been beaten.. And practically tortured. I've done drugs, and gotten drunk more times than I can count. I've tried to commit suicide twenty eight times and counting. And I have more than six hundred scars on my body that I've made myself. I even counted. I hate myself. I don't think I'm pretty, I don't think I'm beautiful. I think I'm worthless. And that if I died, the world would be a much, much better place. I feel like every time something bad happens to me.. it's like the whole world is screaming at me, "JUST FUCKING DIE ALREADY!" I shouted through tears. "JUST DIE SO WE DON'T HAVE TO WASTE OUR BREATH ON YOU!" I finally looked up at him. He was pale and his eyes.. I wasn't positive, but I was sure there were tears in his eyes. "Now do you understand? .. I also have a little sister. She gets treated like a princess. She's never been touched or slapped or burned. She's flawless. And she's a bitch. And I HATE her."

"I.. I'm sorry," Aaron said softly.

"Everyone is. Everyone is always sorry for me. And I'm sick of it. I don't want pity!" I gritted my teeth in frustration.

"..Then what do you want?" he asked, grabbing ahold of my chin and making me face him.

_ _ _

Since I'm this close to her.. She's so.. pretty. And her eyes.. And.. those lips. Gah. Snap out of it. We've only been civil to each other for less than two days.. But..

"..You wanna know what I want?" she asked quietly, her eyes flicking to my lips and back to my eyes.

"Yes.."

"I want someone to love me," Caitlin whispered, looking down. "Someone who actually loves me, and doesn't want to use me."

You already have someone who does. "Yeah. So do I."

"You want someone to love me, or you?" she asked, peeking up at me through her eyelashes. I swallowed the lump in my throat. Gah.

"..Both?" She reached out and put her hand over mine, and my heart palpitated. What's she doing?

Caitlin leaned in closer. "..Can I love you, or is that .. not right?" I could hear my heartbeat thudding in my ears.

"It's.. It's right. Because I was wondering.." Her eyes widened. "Can I love you, too?"

A gorgeous smile broke out across her face. "You love me?" she asked, her voice a high pitched whisper. "But.. Just.. what.. twelve days ago.." Her smile dropped. "You were calling me emo girl. You barely know me though.."

"..To be honest," I started, "I've been in love with you since the day you called me asshole."

She laughed. "So you love me?"

* * *

I looked into his honey colored eyes. "Yeah. I love you." A lopsided grin appeared on his face.

"Really?" I squeaked. "Really really?"

He laughed. "Yes. Really really."

Thunder clapped overhead, and it started to rain. I giggled and closed my eyes, turning my face up towards the sky, and held out my hands. I felt a hand cover mine. I smiled, turning towards Aaron. I put my head on his shoulder.

"Caitlin?" he asked.

"Yeah..?"

"Guess what."

"What?" I asked, looking up at him.

"There's a twenty percent chance that it's already raining," Aaron said, smirking.

"Oh, really? And there's a one hundred percent chance that you're a dork." I smiled.

He pulled me into his lap. "And there's a .. Hrm.. What number is big enough?" I looked up at him, and had a drop of water hit me on the nose. "Aha. There's an infinity-and-one percent chance that I love you." He bent down and kissed my forehead. Oyy. It's amazing what calling someone an asshole can do for you, isn't it?

Another thunder clap boomed overhead. I sat up.

_ _ _

Caitlin looked at me. "Aaron..?"

My heart thudded in my chest. "Yeah..?"

"Don't you think we should probably be getting home soon? My mom.." She looked down.

"Oh. Right. C'mon, let's go," I said, pulling her up and hopping off the bridge.

I started walking, thinking she was behind me. "Uh.. Aaron.."

I turned back. Caitlin was standing on the bridge, trying to figure out how to get down. I couldn't help it. I started laughing my ass off.

"Shut the fuck up and help me!" she squealed, stomping her foot.

"Did you seriously just stomp your foot? I thought girls only did that in movies," I said, holding up my arms.

"If you're not careful, I'll stomp on your face," she muttered, sitting down and hanging her legs off.

"You wouldn't. You love it too much." I smirked.

"I wouldn't push your luck." She hopped off and collided with me, and we tumbled backwards into the grass. Thunder rolled overhead. "Oof!"

Caitlin raised her head up, and looked down at me. I swallowed. Oh.. My.. God. She's.. Gah. I looked at her lips, and at the water running off of her hair, and off of her nose. She's so beautiful. I noticed her eyes flicker to my lips.

She leaned down, and pressed her lips to mine.

* * *

Explosions fired through my insides when my lips met his. I saw fireworks and colors flash behind my eyelids, and I felt my body grow warm, despite the cold rain that was falling now in torrents. Our lips moved in synch, and his fingers wrapped into my hair. My hands intertwined around his neck, and I pushed my lips closer to his, if that was possible.

The only reason I pulled away is because my nose was crushed and I needed to breathe.

I was blushing. Bright red. Like a firetruck.

"You don't need to blush," Aaron whispered, running his finger down my cheek.

"I've never kissed someone.. like that.. before. It's all new to me." My heart was pounding so hard I felt like it would burst out of my chest any minute.

Aaron sat up so that I was face to face with him while on his lap. Oi vai. He's so.. close. And he smells so good.

"You know what? Neither have I," he said, leaning in and kissing me again.

_ _ _

Now I know what people mean when they say "Fireworks explode." My whole body tingled as I wound my fingers into Caitlin's wet hair, and pulled her close once more. I felt her sigh into my mouth, and I groaned. Kissing in the rain is just as good as they say. Maybe better than they said. She put her arms around my neck and pushed closer.

We finally pulled apart so we could get some air.

"Alright. Now we really need to go." Her lips were swollen. I can't imagine the size my already large lips were. Damn the spanish lips.

"Yeah." I helped her up and we walked through the rain to my car.

* * *

Aaron's car was so warm. I turned on the radio as he buckled his seat belt. There wasn't anything good on, so I pulled out the CD I made myself out of my backpack.

I popped it in and turned to number three.

"What's that?" Aaron asked, backing out of the grassy area.

"A song I wrote."

"I still don't understand why you cry for me. Some things are hard to let go, I know. But I stay strong. I don't let right mean less than wrong. Cos there's always tomorrow if you still feel that way. I'm afraid I'm gonna have to say no. Mmmhmm.. I've given you the time and the space to heal. But you just won't change how you feel for me. I'm sorry, I've said all that I can say. I'm letting you down easy. And it's time to walk away. I'm afraid it's gonna have to end now. Mmhmm.."

Aaron was looking at me in awe. "You wrote, sang, and played this?"

I looked down at my fingers that were following the piano. "Yeah. I know, it sucks."

"It's amazing."

I smiled and wiped my eyes.

He grabbed my hand. "What made you write that?" he asked.

"..My first girlfriend killed herself because I left her." I'd never told anyone about Melissa.

"..Girlfriend?" His voice sounded confused.

"Uh.. Yeah. I guess.. I forgot to mention. I'm.. uhm.. I'm a bisexual. I have been since I was six years old." No one, and I mean no one knew this.

I laughed. "It is, actually. So.. Aaron.. when'd you lose your virginity?"

He stepped on the brakes. "Whaaaaat?"

"I said, "When did you lose your virginity?"

"I was twelve." He hit the gas again.

"Ooh. Sounds fun." Why am I jealous? Gah. You haven't known him long enough.. I mean yeah, you just had a hot and heavy make-out session in the rain with him, but that's no reason to get jealous.. And.. shut up, Caitlin.

"It was." Aaron laughed.

_ _ _

"I bet. When's the last time you fucked someone?" Caitlin asked bluntly. I hit the brakes again. Again with the embarrassing questions?

"Uh.. Hrm.. three months?" I have absolutely no idea. I started driving again.

"Bleh. With who?" she said, looking at the window.

"..I dunno. I was drunk."

"Interesting.."

"How's it interesting?" I wondered.

"..You like to drink. That's what's interesting. Everyone I know is like.. "Sure.. I'll have some beer, but anything else? Ew, gross!" It sickens me. Alcohol is great." I started laughing.

"That was hilarious."

"Why, thank you, my kind sir," she said, bowing over in her seat like she was taking a round of applause.

As we pulled back into town, the storm finally let up. I ran my thumb over Caitlin's hand, and she looked up at me.

"Caitlin..?" I asked. Should I ask her this..?

"Yeah?"

I turned to look out the windshield. "Does your father still.. come around?"

It took her a minute to answer. "..Every once in a while.. He'll probably show up soon," she said.

"Does.. he..?" I trailed off, not wanting to say it.

"..Usually.. yeah. My mom always leaves with Brandi for somewhere fun, like.. Florida, and leaves me .. with him. She doesn't give a damn." Ahh, shit. She was crying.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked," I said in a sincere apology.

"No..It's fine. You need to know.. in case something happens." I swear my heart stopped beating.

"..What do you mean.. if something.. happens?"

"..If he.. causes—"

I cut her off, and turned her to look at me. "If he does anything to you, I'm going to kick his ass. Seriously. And.. if he does.. and I can't.. DO. NOT. hurt yourself over something that bastard did." Tears were falling down her cheeks.

"I.. I can't make any promises.. Aaron. I'm.. sorry."

I parked in front of her house and turned to face her. Running my finger down her pale, tear streaked cheek, I placed a soft kiss on her lips, and pulled her to my chest. I could feel sobs wrack her body. When she cries it's like I'm breaking inside. "Shh.. It's alright. It will all be alright."

"N - no i - it's not. H - he always takes adva - antage of m - me in the w - worst possible way! He's supposed to b - be my dad! Not my fucking r - rapist!" She started sobbing again.

"I know he should. He's a fucking.. I don't know. I don't think there's a word for what he is, Caitlin. All I can say is that he's a prick that needs to rot in hell for eternity. How many times has he.. done .. that to you?" I asked, not completely sure if I wanted to know the answer.

"H - hundreds, I'm sure. It started when I was little," she mumbled into my chest.

* * *

He was so angry he was shaking. I looked up at him through blurry eyes, and pressed my lips to his. He immediately kissed me back, and the shaking stopped. His fingers knotted in my hair, and he pulled me closer to him. I moaned in the back of my throat, and Aaron groaned, and unbuckled my seat belt. I heard the click of him undoing his seat belt, and the next thing I knew, I was on his lap, and against the steering wheel, somewhat.. And I was enjoying every little bit of it. Anger-filled kisses are hot.

I pulled away to breathe and kissed his neck, which smelled like Axe. Ahh. Yum. I couldn't distinguish what noise he made exactly.. But I liked it. So I did it again. So did he.

"Gah," he muttered. "Are you trying to kill me?" Aaron squirmed.

"What if I am?" I asked between kissing his neck and ear.

"Then you're doing a really good job," he groaned. "Who the hell knew you could kiss like this?"

I nipped at his collar bone. "I didn't."

He made another unintelligible noise, and pulled me back to his lips, which I happily followed. Is it just me, or is it extremely hot in here?

_ _ _

She was driving me fucking insane with kissing my neck. Where her lips touched, it burned, like someone had set me on fire. I'd never felt this before.. and a lot of people have kissed my neck. I decided to pay her back by breaking the kiss and pressing my lips to her neck. She all but screamed. I kissed up and down her neck and around her collar bone, and behind her ear. Let's just say I found the spot that makes her scream. Cough-ear-cough.

"Are you trying to kill me?" she squeaked as I assaulted her neck again.

"What do you think?"

"Ah!" Caitlin said as I kissed behind her ear again. "Yes. I am really starting to think you a—ah!—are."

"And I think you're correct," I mumbled against her neck. "How am I doing?" I think I'm doing pretty well.

"Well.. I really wouldn't mind dying this way," she whispered, her head falling back as I kissed her collar bone.

"I wouldn't mind killing you this way." I kissed along where her tank top started. Somehow her hoodie had gotten unzipped. I thank whatever higher powers made that happen.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

After the little scene in the car — I believe I won that battle — Caitlin invited me in. She said her mom didn't get home until 6:30, and her sister was at a friend's for the week. Currently we were intertwined on the couch watching her DVD collection of Family Guy. At the moment, Herbert the Pervert was trying to get Chris to get Popsicles.

"Get yo' fat ass back here, bitch," Herbert said, and Caitlin cracked up. I'm serious. Gut-wrenching laughter.

"What's so funny about a moldy old dude saying "Get your fat ass back here, bitch?" I didn't get it.

"It's hilarious. Especially because I can say it how he does," she said through peals of laughter that shook the couch. "Get yo' fat ass back here, bitch," she said, sounding exactly like Herb the Perv.

"Okay," I said, "that is fuckin' creepy. Please never do that again," I asked, my eyes wide.

Caitlin used the Herb voice. "Alright sexy thing."

My eyes got to the size of grapefruits, I swear.

"Hey, your eyes are gonna fall out sometime soon if you keep that up, my boy," she teased.

I glared. "Don't make me hurt you." All that kissing had gotten me hyper or some fucking thing.

"Oh, ha. You wouldn't hurt me. You love me too much. You showed me that in the car," Caitlin whispered, grinning.

"..I have my ways.. I can.. torture you for hours.. and hours.. and hours.. on end.." Her eyes got wider with every word.

"Hey, your eyes are gonna fall out sometime soon if you keep that up, mi chica," I said, tossing her words back at her with a smirk on my face.

She hit my chest with her hand. We'd moved so that she was halfway on top of me, and we weren't so intertwined anymore. Out of nowhere, she practically slammed her head into my chest.

"Oof!" Ow. She has a big head. It's full of.. book.. stuff. Hell, I don't know. It's heavy.

"..Uh.. Muscle twitch?" she said, trying to come up with an excuse.

"I have a better excuse."

"It wasn't an excuse!" she cut in.

"Your head is so heavy that it fell," I joked.

"Don't make me do it again," Caitlin said, turning to look at the TV, and inhaling. "You smell really good."

"So you like the smell of Axe, eh?" I ran my fingers through her hair.

"Yeah. Especially when you're wearing it." She propped her chin up on my chest and looked at me. "We've only been dating.. what.. four hours? And we've had.. four.. or was it three? .. extreme make out sessions. Gah. You're gonna get into my pants within a day, probably."

"You think that's all I'm aiming for? Is getting in your pants?"

"No. But it'll probably happen. You're really hard to resist. And I mean REALLY." Caitlin blushed.

"Why're you blushing?" I asked, brushing her cheek with my index finger.

"I'm probably not that hard to resist.. you know."

"Why wouldn't you be?" ..Does she.. think she isn't..

"Well.. I'm not pretty, or anything. I mean.. yeah, I can kiss, according to you.. But that's about it." She had a defeated look on her face.

I put my hands around her arms and pulled her up closer to me, so that our faces were only about a foot apart. "You're gorgeous, beautiful, pretty, sexy.. You're.. just.. amazing," I said quietly.

"..Really?" Her eyes were filled with skepticism.

"And everyone else in my family."

I closed the distance between us and kissed her.

"You know," she said when we pulled away, "you're the first person to ever call me pretty, let alone sexy," she laughed. I love her laugh.

"Well, you are."

A grin appeared on her face. "Hah. So are you."

"I'm whaa..?" God, I sounded like an idiot.

"You. Are. Sexy," she said, finishing with a tap on my nose.

"Why, thank you," I laughed.

"Your laugh is fascinating," Caitlin murmured out of the blue.

"So is yours. It's cute." She blushed again.

"But I squeak and squeal when I laugh. I hate my laugh."

"It's adorable." I kissed her again.

Right as she started kissing back, she sat up.

"..Oh shit. It's 6:25! You have to go before my mom gets home!"

By the time she finished saying this, she'd already pulled me up from the couch.

"Will I see you tomorrow?" I asked, putting on my sneakers.

"If I make it to school, yes. Or you can pick me up, I guess. My mom leaves by 5:30 in the morning." She placed a chaste kiss on my lips and ushered me out the door. "I'm sorry I'm being so pushy, but my mom will kill me."

"Why?" I asked, being shoved down the stairs by a girl who was nearly a foot shorter than I was.

"She'll think I'm doing like.. a zillion guys or something. And she'll go all.. "OHH MYY GOOODDD MY DAUGHTERS' A WHOREEEEEEEEEEEEE!" on me again." My eyes widened. Damn. Fucking nuts, or what?

"Yeah, I know," she said, replying to my eyes widening. "Now, go. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

I turned around and kissed her forcefully, and said, "I love you," and took off towards my car.

* * *

I watched Aaron drive away. It felt like my lips were burning. I was still standing there with my hand to my lips when my mom pulled into the driveway.

"Get your ass in that house," she said, slamming the car door.

"Yes, ma'am," I muttered, walking into the house and starting dinner. This was going to be a long, long night.

* * *

I was thankful when morning came. I woke up around 6 AM. My mother was gone. I ran my fingers through my hair and sighed. Last night was rough. My mother had kept yelling at me for some unknown reason. And then she switched to screaming at me in Spanish.. She had even threatened to yank out my eyebrow ring. That would have hurt like a mother-fucker.

I stretched and dug my purple skinny jeans out of the pile of crap on my floor. It was mostly clothes. I pulled on my Paramore; Riot! shirt that I made, and grabbed my Paramore hoodie, and maneuvered my way through my room into the bathroom, where I plugged in my flat iron.

After thirty minutes of struggling with my stupid curls, I started downstairs, only to trip on the second-to-last, and landed on my face. "AGH! Ow."

And of course, at that opturn moment, the front door opens, and Aaron's voice says, "My, oh, my. What have we here?"

"A person in pain," I said, my voice somewhat muffled by the carpet. "Help."

Aaron pulled me up and I fell backwards onto my butt. Today is not my day.

I could hear Aaron trying not to laugh, and I shot a glare at him. He burst out laughing. "I hate you," I said, getting up and dusting myself off. I gingerly touched my nose to make sure I hadn't rebroken it.

"No you don't. And if you do, it's only temporary," Aaron said, wrapping his arms around me from behind.

I sighed. "I guess. But you're an ass." I smiled. "And I love you."

"I love you, too. And your ass." He patted my purple skinny jean clad butt with his hand. I squeaked.

"Aaron! You perv-ass." I smacked his arm.

"Again with asses? Now who's the pervert?" He smirked.

"YOU!" I threw my hands up in exasperation and got a poptart out of the cupboard.

"You love it," he whispered in my ear. I almost dropped my poptart. I choked on it instead.

"Maybe," I said, when I'd cleared my trachea of any stray pastry.

"There is no "Maybe" about it," he whispered into my ear again. I shivered, and it wasn't because I was cold.

"..Maybe there is. Maybe there isn't," I said nonchalantly, taking another bite of my pop tart.

"Give me some of that," Aaron said.

I turned and opened my mouth to show him my chewed pop tart. "Want it?" I asked with my tongue out.

".."

I started laughing, but stopped when his hand reached out and snatched my pop tart. He shoved it in his mouth.

"YOU BASTARD! YOU ATE MY FUCKING POPTART! YOU OWE ME A POP TART!"

Neither of us could help it. We both burst into hysterical laughter. I actually fell on the floor.

"What drug are you on?" Aaron asked.

"I am on the goodness of the pop tart. OF WHICH YOU STILL OWE ME ONE. I AM NOT FORGETTING THAT!" I shouted.

"I'M RIGHT HERE. YOU DON'T NEED TO SHOUT," Aaron yelled back.

"WHAT IF I WANT TO?"

"THEN I'M GOING TO HAVE TO SHUT YOU UP," he said, tackling me back onto the floor.

"Woo. Early morning/before school sex!" I said, laughing.

He did a face-to-palm, and then pulled me up. I started giggling, and I couldn't stop.

When we got to the car, which took nearly five minutes because I said "Hi. I love you." to all of our plants—don't be alarmed. I get like this from time to time—I started rambling.

As Aaron pulled out of the driveway, I started talking to the dashboard.

"Mac 'n' cheese.. cheese with crackers.. crackers and ham.. ham on a sammich.. sammich to eat..." Aaron gave me a weird look. "Ssssssss.. knuckle sammich.. knuckle on finger.. finger in mouth.. mouth to drink? Uh.." I scratched my head. "Drinking.. drinking alcohol! Shoppaholic.. uh.. shop at a store.. store with clothes.. clothes you have on yourself.." I kept getting weird looks. "Yourself and I.. iHop! I HOP TO WALMART!" I exclaimed with jubilation. "Walmart is blue. Blue is one of my favorite colors. Color is the color of rainbows. TASTE THE RAINBOW! Rainbows are the colors of skittles.. SKITTLE KISSES! TASTE THE RAINBOW! LITERALLY! Skittles is my pet's name.. Pets can mean cats and dogs.. dogs chew.. Chew meat.. Chewing gum.. Gum shooting at gun? Gun to walmart? Walmart has EVERYTHING! LOW PRICES! Prices turn high. High mountain.. Mountain Dew.. Dew is on grass! Grass is green. Green is the color of..uh.. St. Patrick's Day.. Day of.. day of.." I had a moment of silence. "Deja vu. View the phone. Phone call. Call police. POLICE STATION! Gas station! Stationary.. Is that a word? Uh.. Dairy.. Dairy cheese.. Square cheese. Square dancing. Dancing in a club.. Club the sammich!" Everything was silent except for my talking. Aaron's eyes were as wide as dinner plates. "Hmm.. club.. infinity..? I just made that up. INFINITY AND BEYOND! Infinity for life! Life lasts forever.. wait.. nuuu. It dun't. Evermore.. I need more words."

Total silence.

"Pot and stew.. Stew is soup. Soup with meat. Meat you grind. Grind cheese. Cheese in a can. CAN. FILLED. WITH. SPAGHETTI. O'S. Spaghetti Os. Drop on the floor. Floor tiles. I'm tired. Tires on the wheel. Tires get flat. Flat gum. Gum in mouth. Mouth chewing gum. Gum in the gas station? That gum in.. Kum and Go. Go.. to the library. Library has books. Books are fun. Fun is life.. Ahh. That's all I got."

"What the hell was that?" Aaron asked incredulously.

"I was explaining stuff to the dashboard, stupid," I said, crossing my arms.

"..Ooookay.. Let me ask you a reasonable question."

"Yus?"

"ARE YOU HIGH?"

"ARE YOU.. A GIRL?" I asked shrilly.

"No!" He was so confused.

"And there is my answer." And then I started laughing. Maybe I was high.

"Wait.. what?" He parked the car at school and turned to look at me. "Are you on reefer or something?"

"No. But those are fun. Did you poison my pop tart?" I asked with a serious look on my face, my nose scrunched.

"If I had, I'd be acting like I was loony tunes, too. Which I am not. What the hell is wrong with you?" He placed his hand on my forehead.

"Hey, hey, hey. No touchy."

He poked me.

"HEY! I SAID NO TOUCHY!" I poked him back. He poked me again. "Stoooooooooooooooooop!"

Aaron poked me repeatedly, so I poked him back.. Next thing I knew, we were having an extreme poke fight. Aaron ended it by pulling me to him and kissing me forcefully. How fun.

_ _ _

Oh, so randomly.. In the middle of math class, when Mrs. Hockenberry said "Perpendicular," I literally burst into laughter.

"Miss Evans, is there something you would like to share with the class?" she asked, a look of sheer annoyance on her face.

"Per - per - perpen - dic - ular!" I choked out between peals of laughter. Everyone—and I mean EVERYONE—was staring at me as I slid out of my chair and onto the floor because I was laughing so hard.

"Would you like to be excused for a drink of water?" Mrs. H. asked impatiently.

I nodded, still laughing, and hauled myself off the floor, and walked out the door, and promptly collapsed against the wall in laughter. A minute later, Aaron showed up. His Language class was right by where I was collapsed. Apparently he could hear me, and excused himself. This only made me laugh harder.

"I can hear you in my class room, and I'm the one farthest from the door!" Aaron dropped down on his haunches and looked me in the.. well.. not my eyes, cos I closed them and started laughing harder. "No, seriously. Are you okay?"

"I don't know," I choked out, still laughing. "It hurrrrrrrrtssssss, Aaron."

"What does?"

"My stomachhhhhh! Too much lauuughhiiinngggg!" I squealed, kicking my feet.

"That's it. I'm taking you home. Stay .. nevermind," Aaron said, getting up and running down the hall to my locker, leaving me there, laughing so hard my eyes were watering.

A little kid walked by me, and I stopped laughing, and glared. "WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT, MIDGET?!" And then collapsed in laughter again as the little kid ran off.

When Aaron came back, I was laying on my back, laughing at the ceiling. He heaved a sigh, and pulled me up to my feet. "I already told the office I'm taking you home, and I took your bag to my car."

I screamed as he hauled me over his shoulder, and I pounded my fists on his back. "I can walk, you know!"

"Barely," he said, reminding me of falling down the stairs this morning, which, in turn, caused me to start laughing again.

"I fell down the stairs," I laughed, my head hitting his back.

"Yes. Yes you did. I saw it," he said, walking closer to the school entrance.

"Hey. Hey, Aaron?" I asked, giggling.

"Yes, Caitlin?"

"You have a really nice ass, you know."

He almost dropped me. "Oh, really?"

I reached down and squeezed it. "Yes, really."

"AGH!" He swatted my butt.

"Hey! Don't make me bite your ass. Cos I swear I will."

"You will?" he asked, sounding amused.

"I dare you to try that again. SEE WHAT HAPPENS."

He swatted it again. And so I bit him.

"OW! That hurt!"

"I TOLD YOU I'D DO IT."

"God, woman," Aaron said, opening the school doors.

"AHHHH! THE LIGHT! IT BURRRRRRRRRRRRNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSSS!"

"Shut up."

"NUUUUUUUU!"

"YEEEEEEESSSS."

"DON'T MAKE ME BITE YOU AGAIN, AARON!"

"Fine, fine," he said, setting me on the hood of his car. I flung open the door and hopped in, poking the dashboard.

"DID YOU MISS ME?!" I asked it, waiting for a reply.

When Aaron got in, I exclaimed, "Aaron! It won't answer me!"

He looked from me, to the dashboard several times, as if he were following a tennis match. "It's afraid of you," he said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

I turned to look at it. "Why are you afraid of me? I love you!"

"That is why it's afraid of you," he muttered, pulling out. "Do you have multiple personality disorder or something?"

"But.. if I love it, why is it afraid of me? Did I offend it?" I asked him, my eyes wide. "And no.. I don't.. think so."

"Yes. You offended it. It wants personal space. So give it personal space." I could tell that he found this very amusing.

"..Oh, wow."

We had arrived at my house. "I am not leaving you alone after what I witnessed today," Aaron said, turning to look at me.

I grinned. "Okay!"

_ _ _

Caitlin had finally stopped acting all loopy, and we were laying on her bed. She was asleep with her head on my chest. She mumbled in her sleep, and wrapped her leg around mine.

I ran my fingers through her hair. She murmured again, and tightened her grip around my middle. I could fully see all of her scars, including the nearly healed cuts that she'd had the from the night in the rain. She still hadn't told me what her mom had hit her for. Her arm was covered in scars. I could tell that some had faded, because her arm was an un-natural color underneath the.. twenty seven long lines going down her arm, not counting the.. eighty or so on her wrist. It was worse than I'd thought. But.. We haven't even been dating for more than twenty four hours.. maybe not even twenty four hours.. and yet, the thought of leaving her hurt me. It hurt me to no end.

Caitlin stirred in her sleep, and lifted her head. "Aaron?" she mumbled.

"Hmm?" I asked softly.

"I love you," she said, and lay her head back down.

"I love you, too."

I must have fallen asleep, because when I woke up, it was four thirty.

Caitlin was sprawled out across me, her arms around my shoulders.

"Caaaitliin?" I said, shaking her shoulder a little.

She lifted her head. "Whaa? Is my omelet done, Mr. Wiggles?"

Gosh. What does she dream about? "Yes. It is."

"Did you put the pickles in it like I ordered?"

"Yes." Pickles?

"I loooooove youuuu," she murmured, kissing my neck. She seemed to be awake enough now to torture me. I suppressed a groan.

"You were never half asleep, were you?" I asked, trying to keep my voice level. It was quite hard, actually.

"Nope," she said, nipping my collarbone. "You know.. my mom doesn't get home until tomorrow. She .. has stuff to do.." She punctuated every word with another kiss to my neck. I couldn't hold back the groan this time.

I slid my hands up her back underneath of her shirt. She let out a small sound. She payed me back by sticking her hands under my shirt and running them up my chest, and kissed up my neck. I let out another low groan.

"You like that, do you?" she mumbled against my jaw.

I let out somewhat of an "Mhmm.." but I'm not quite sure that it was an "Mmhmm."

I slid her top up higher, and ran my hands down her sides. Her breathing got shallow.

She pressed her lips to mine, and grasped my shoulders, and ran her hands down my arms, which caused me to let out a groan. I could feel her sliding her hands underneath my shirt, and sliding it up.

As it progressed into a French kiss, I slid her shirt up, and grasped the back of her bra. She pulled away and looked down at me. Her lips were swollen. "It's okay," Caitlin whispered breathlessly, and kissed me again. I unhooked her bra as she pushed my shirt off. I slid her bra straps down her shoulders as she moved back to kissing my neck. Pulling her bra and shirt off, I rolled us over, and kissed her jaw.

I kissed down her neck and around her collar bone. She let out a small moan, which struck me in a certain area that I bet you could guess. I kissed down her chest, which caused her to arch her back. I kissed down to her jean line, and kissed back up.

Caitlin managed to roll us back over, and she sat up on top of me. Her hair was messed up (Sex hair to the extreme) and her lips were swollen. All of a sudden, she rocked back and forth, and we both let out a loud moan. I grabbed her hips. She continued to do this, and you can only imagine what happened. Then again, maybe some of you don't have to imagine it.

We finally fell asleep, still shirtless, with her head on my bare chest.

* * *

It was still dark when I woke up. Aaron's chest was very, very warm and comfortable. I shifted in the bed and Aaron's voice filled the room. "Can't sleep either?"

"Nope," I said quietly. My jeans were digging into my sides. I crawled out of the bed.

"What are you doing?" Aaron asked, his eyes glinting eerily in the light from the moon.

"Nothing," I said, unbuckling my jeans. I could see his eyes widen. I stepped out of them, and crawled back into bed.

"That's a nice change," he said, smirking. I heard his pants unzip, and next thing I knew, his pants were on my floor.

This time, he lay his head on my chest—promptly in between my boobs, I might add. But it's not like he hadn't already tou.. Uh.. Cough—and wrapped his arms around my waist. "You know.. you make a nice pillow," Aaron said.

I started laughing. "Eden used to say "Dude. Your tits make great pillows." That was a classic," I said.

"Wow."

"Shush," I replied, running my hand down his back.

"Gah," he said, his breathing hitching.

"Aha. That works on both of us."

"Oh, does it now?"

"Yes," I said, doing it again.

"Gaah," Aaron said, squirming.

I started laughing, but immediately stopped when Aaron ran his hand down my side, and over my hip. I let out a small noise that resembled a moan.

Aaron, apparently wanting me to make more of those noises, ran his hands up and down my chest. I arched my back, and moaned a bit louder. "You.. tease," I whispered. He replied by sliding his hands back to my waist slowly, splaying his fingers out across my abdomen. He leaned in and brushed his lips across my neck and down my collar bone.

My breathing hitched and sped up when he kissed down my stomach, and pulled the corner of my panties down and kissed along the inside of my thighs.

I could see him smirk in the dark when I looked down at him. He kissed back up my body until he reached my lips, and then he pressed a chaste kiss to them. I let out the breath I was holding.

"You. Are. A. Fucking. Tease," I said breathlessly.

"And you love it," he whispered into my ear.

"..Maybe," I said, my heart speeding up.

"Again with the maybes?"

"Uh huh," I squeaked.

"So.. you don't love it when I do.. this?" he asked into my ear, running his hand over my chest and down my side, listening to my breathing speed up and hitch.

I couldn't respond, so I let out a squeak.

"That's what I thought," he said. I swear I could hear the smirk in his voice.

"Like you don't love it when I do this?" I asked, sliding my hand all the way down his chest to the line where his boxers met his waist.

Aaron made a sound that sounded pained, but I knew what that sound meant.

"Aha. I thought so," I replied to his noise.

"Shut up," he said, and put his head back on my chest. "Go to sleep, Caitlin."

"You too. It'll be weird if you watch me sleep while having your head on my chest," I said back, stretching.

"How?"

"Hello? You're on my boobs." I laughed. "It'll feel weird."

"So.. If you wake up, and I have my head right here, staring at you, you'll probably scream?"

".."

"Bahaha."

"Shut up and go to sleep."

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

_ _ _

I woke up before Caitlin did. Sitting up, I surveyed the room. My shirt was on the fan, and Caitlin's was stuck in her lamp. Our pants were in a pile on the floor. It looks like someone got laid last night. The only thing—I found Caitlin's bra. ..It was hanging out the window. Oops.—missing was a pair of panties and boxers.

I turned back to look at Caitlin, and almost burst into laughter. She was face down with her head tilted to the left, her left arm hanging off the mattress. Her hair was all over her face and across her nude back. Her mom wasn't home yet, apparently, considering the driveway was empty.

Standing up, I stretched, and decided I should probably take a shower. I would absolutely love to take a shower with Caitlin.. but.. we've only been dating.. about two days, and already this has happened. We don't need to rush it more than we already have. Not that I regret it. I don't regret it one bit. I just don't want to fuck up what I just got, which.. I'm starting to think.. may be one of the best things that can happen to me. I dunno. We'll just have to find out.

Making my way through Caitlin's room—which was pretty hard, if you were wondering—I grabbed a towel and turned on the shower.

Half-way through it, I heard the bathroom door open, and I peeked out the curtain.

Caitlin had stumbled into the bathroom with a towel around her. "Hi," she said, blinking.

I swallowed. It was a very short, black towel. Gah. Damnit.

"Hi to you, too," I said, rinsing my hair.

"Whatcha doin'?" she asked, sitting on the counter and crossing her legs. Why, oh why must I be able to see through this curtain? Why?!

"Oh, nothing. Taking a shower, obviously," I replied, internally cursing whoever made that towel.

"No, really? Hmm.."

Oh no. She said "Hmm." That can't mean something good.

I heard her jump off the counter, and her feet pad across the floor. Next thing I knew, her voice was practically by mine. "Room for one more in there?"

"..Uh.." I couldn't even speak right. Dammit!

"Pleeeeeeaseeeee?" Ahh.

"Yeah. Room for one more," I choked out.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

I heard that insanely small towel hit the floor, and the curtain open. Next thing I knew, her hands were on my stomach, and she whispered in my ear, "You look tasty when wet." Was she trying to drive me insane?

I turned around, and my eyes widened.

Her hair was sopping wet and in her face, and it was just long enough to cover her chest. I had a.. uhm.. growing problem, if you get what I mean.

She smirked. "See something you like?"

I put my arms out around her against the shower wall, so she couldn't move, and lowered my lips to her ear. "Definitely."

I pressed up against her and she gasped, feeling my problem pressed against her stomach. "Wow," she said, a slight laugh in her voice.

"Guess who's fault that is," I whispered, smirking.

"Oh, I dunno," she replied sarcastically. "Angelina Jolie?"

"No," I said. "Why don't I repay you in making you have a small problem of your own?"

Her eyes widened.

"Oh, yes. Be afraid."

"I am."

"Good," I said, leaning in and kissing her neck. It was wet, which made it easier to make her squirm. I placed my hands on her waist and pulled her close, all the while kissing her neck. She was starting to make little noises.

I slid my hands down, and pulled her even closer, if that was possible.

I kissed down her chest, pausing for a moment. (Use your imagination, people) She let out a semi-loud shout.

Going lower, he shouts became more proclaimed, and her back arched.

She let out a small shudder as I kissed back up her body.

"You know," she said breathlessly, "you started a problem.. and fixed it.. But.." Caitlin trailed off, looking down. "You have a problem that hasn't been fixed."

I pushed her against the wall again. "I bet we can find a way to fix that."

"So do I," she whispered, and grabbed my head, yanking it forward, kissing me hard.

* * *

Currently, Aaron and I were curled up on the couch under a big, soft blanket, watching Mean Girls. You don't know how much force that took.

"Get in loser, we're going shopping!"

Aaron looked at me. "What the hell.." he trailed off, taking another breath to continue, "is wrong with you?"

"I love you, too."

"I love you more," I replied, not taking my eyes off the screen.

"No you don't," he said.

"Yes, I do."

"If you did, you'd look at me when you said it," he quipped, sounding full of himself.

I looked over at him. "I love you more, Aaron," I said softly, looking at him through my eyelashes. I could hear his breathing quicken, and I smirked slightly.

"No, you don't," he said again.

"I do."

"Don't."

"Do.

"Don't."

"Do."

"Don't."

"Dooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"

"Doooooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn't!"

"BLAH!" I shouted, throwing my hands in the air. "Fine! You win!"

"Yes!"

"Shut up," I said, turning up the TV.

He put his head on my shoulder. "You love me."

I sighed and rested my head on top of his. "Yeah. I guess."

"You guess?"

".."

"You GUESS?"

".."

".."

I started laughing. Hard. "AHAHA! You're so FUNNY!"

He frowned and put his head back on my shoulder. "You're mean."

"You love me."

"I guess."

"Haha. Very funny."

"I thought it was."

"And yet, you're not laughing," I pointed out.

"Ha. Ha ha ha," he said sarcastically.

I pushed on his arm.

..And then he pushed me off the couch.

"Now that is what I call funny," he choked out between peals of laughter. I pulled myself off the floor, and turned to look at him. My eye twitched. He swallowed. "Oh no."

"OH YES. COME HERE YOU LITTLE BUGGER!" I flew at him and we actually knocked the couch over.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Aaron squealed. Yes, he actually squealed. Like a little girl.

"YOU SCREAM LIKE A GIRL!" I shouted, sitting on him and hitting him with a pillow.

"SO DO YOU!"

"I AM A GIRL, RETARD!" I hit him again.

"DO YOU KNOW THAT FOR SURE?!" Oh, no he didn't. I pressed my face against his.

"You seemed pretty sure that I was in the shower an hour ago." He swallowed again, his golden eyes widening. "Mhmm. That's what I thought." I hit him once more for good measure, and got off him. But that was to be a short-lived victory, for he grabbed my ankle and pulled me back down, and rolled on top of me.

"I win." He smirked and kissed me.

"Alright, alright, you win," I said, kissing him back. "If this is what I get every time you win, I'll lose more often."

He laughed. "I doubt it." He got up off of me, and stood there, staring down at me.

"Whatchu lookin' at?" I quipped, growling.

"The most beautiful girl in the world," he said, smiling.

"WILL YOU STOP WITH THAT?!" I asked, huffing.

"Nope. Not when it's true." I growled and he laughed.

"Help me up." I raised my arms up like a little toddler, and he laughed again.

"You're so weird," he said, helping me up. "Now, let's feed you."

"Blah, blah, blah." Aaron kissed my cheek, and I obliged. Stupid boy who gets whatever he wants.

Not much later, we were sitting at the table eating spaghetti.

"Fuckin' noodle." Aaron shouted, stabbing his spaghetti in an attempt to get it on his fork.

"Aaron, it's already dead." He glared. I took his fork and spun it, getting the spaghetti. When I tried to give him his fork back, he opened his mouth. I stuck the fork in, and when he bit down, I let go, so he had a fork sticking out of his mouth.

As I took a sip of my water, he made a cross eyed glare at me, and I had to cover my nose and mouth. I ran to the sink and spit it out, as it ran down my face, and I collapsed on the floor in laughter, my eyes watering.

After Aaron managed to swallow, he started laughing at me.

I grabbed the table and pulled myself up so that he could only see my eyes on up, and glared. He laughed even harder.

God, this is the best dinner I've ever had.

After the laughter died down, I climbed back into my chair, and we finished dinner.

Aaron said he'd be right back, so I started washing the dishes.

As I started washing my cup, two arms encircled my waist, and I dropped the cup, and soapy water shot up and covered my head. I turned around, and found Aaron, struggling not to laugh. I was frowning severely, so he grabbed a towel and started wiping me off. He was still trying not to laugh. I stepped on his foot.

"Ow!" I glared. "Sorry."

After he'd gotten most of the suds off me, I turned around.

"Caitlin.. Come on. I'm sorry. I won't do- "

I cut him off by shoving a handful of soap bubbles into his face.

"Pay back is a bitch, honey," I said, mocking my old friend, Amy. His jaw was hanging open.

"You'll wish you hadn't done that, honey." Crap.

He took a handful of bubbles and shoved it in my face. I took another and threw it at him. He did it back. Oh great. A bubble fight.

I grabbed the hose attachment and turned on the water. Aaron's bubble-clad hand stopped in mid-air. "I'll do it. I swear."

"Don't you even."

I pulled the handle a little and a bit of water squirted out. "I will. I swear."

He shoved the bubbles into my face, and I sprayed.

The water shot off his chest and hit me back in the face, so we both got soaked.

Aaron tried to grab the hose, which in turn sprayed both of us. "Give me the hose, Caitlin!"

"NEVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!" I shouted, trying to get it. I sprayed myself in the chest. Why, oh WHY did I have to be wearing a white shirt at this moment? And with a black bra? How cliché.

He finally got the hose, and sprayed me with it. I screamed. "DAMN YOU AARON! DAMN YOU TO HELLLLLLLLLL!"

He finally stopped spraying me, and I bet I looked like a half-drowned cat. I stepped on his foot and stole the hose, and sprayed him back.

"AHHHHHHHHHH! FUCK YOUUUUU!" he shouted.

"YOU WISHHHH!" I shouted back.

"I ALREADY HAV -" and then he made a weird gurgling sound. I'm betting he got some in his mouth.

He smacked the faucet switch, and the water stopped spraying. I gulped, and took off out the patio doors, and ran to the drive way.

"Get back here!" he shouted, following me as I started running down the street.

"MAKE ME!"

As I ran by Mr. Crisswell's house, he was standing there, watering his flowers. He looked up, and his mouth dropped as I ran by, and then as Aaron ran by, screaming at each other, dripping wet, and covered in bubbles. He dropped the hose, and it sprayed him in the face. Ha.

"Oh, when I catch you, I WILL MAKE YOU!" Aaron said, running behind me.

"LIKE YOU'LL CATCH ME!" I curved and ran back past him. He stopped, and started following me again.

We ran back past Mr. Crisswell, and he was still staring.

"Hi Mr. Criswell!" I said, running back past him and around my house.

"Hi Cait..lin..," he said, waving slowly.

By the time Aaron had come around the house, I had the hose on, and was aiming at him. He stopped in his tracks. "Not again."

I could see Mr. Crisswell peeking over the top of his fence, holding a video camera.

"OH. YES. Again." I pulled the lever, and sprayed him full on.

"ARGHHHHHH! Stopp itttt!" Aaron was waving his hands, trying to keep the water away. FAILURE.

"NEVER! AHAHAHHAHAHHA!" I started running at him, chasing him, as we ran in circles.

Aaron managed to grab the hose, and yank it out of my hands. Oh no.

I started running back to the drive way, but I got hit with a jet of water. I kept on running, my feet now pounding the sidewalk, as Aaron chased me, spraying me. Mr. Crisswell was still following with his camera. Damned long garden hose!

We were now standing in the middle of the street, and he was spraying me. And I was screaming.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"As you said, PAYBACK IS A BITCH, HONEY!" He started laughing.

"DON'T STEAL MY LINES!"

He lowered the hose. I took that as my opportunity to run past him into the yard again. "Hey!"

Aaron chased me back, and yes, I do have a pool, and yes he chased me into the pool. Goddamnit!

Mr. Crisswell was STILL filming us. My old social studies teacher, for godsakes!

Before Aaron could get back to the pool completely, I sucked in a big breath, and went under, shooting off the wall to the side he was sure to stand by. I came up for air one more time, and saw him coming around.

Up through the water, I could see him standing on the edge.

I shot up, grabbed his ankle, and yanked him into the pool. He screamed.

I could see him drop in, and shoot to the top. I came up for air, and grinned at him.

"And now you're wet."

"Like I wasn't already?!"

"AHHHH!" I said as he started swimming at me.

Now we were chasing each other in the pool.

"GIVE UP ALREADY!" he shouted. "YOU WON'T WIN THIS!"

"YES I WILLLLLLLL!" I screamed, trying to swim faster, and failing as he grabbed my ankle and yanked. "OKAY! OKAY! MERCY!"

Pulling me to him by my ankle as I tried in a fruitless attempt to doggy-paddle away, he tackled me under the water.

I gurgled and stepped on his leg, shooting back to the surface, screaming, when I somehow wound up on his shoulders. I started hitting his head with my palms while he splashed me. And Mr. Crisswell was still filming.

* * *

After the water fight that we had this afternoon, and having my old Social Studies teacher see my bra.. we'd finally calmed down after we tried to drown each other in the pool. Mr. Crisswell is probably putting that up on YouTube. Just great.

My clothes still weren't dry. And the kitchen is like, under water. We have a big job in the morning.

I came out to the living room, with my blanket around my shoulders and holding a bowl of popcorn. I sat down next to Aaron and pushed him a little. "Move over, couch hog."

"Psht. Me? Couch hog? YOU move over." He pushed back.

"YOU move over," I said, pushing back.

"Make me."

I threw popcorn at him. "There."

He glared. Aaron threw some at me. "You wanna play it like that?"

My jaw dropped. "You did not just do that." I threw some more at him.

"Yes. I did."

Oh god. Now it was a full on popcorn fight. WHY AGAIN?!

"Argh!" I said, throwing a whole handful at him.

We were still on the couch, and there was now popcorn everywhere.

As I tried to throw another, Aaron grabbed my wrist, and I dropped the popcorn on my lap.

"You're not playing fair, you know," I said, staring intently at him.

"I know. And I don't care." He grabbed my other wrist. "And you really don't care either, do you?"

I gulped. "Maybe."

"There's no maybe about it," he whispered, getting closer.

"Maybe there is," I whispered back, my eyes flickering to his lips.

"I don't think so, Caitlin. There is no maybe about it, when it comes to me. I can see that much." He continued to get closer.

"How do you see that, Aaron?"

"Because.. when I do.. this— " He kissed me softly "—you do that."

"Do.. what?" I was having trouble speaking.

"One, you can't breathe, and two, you can't speak right," he whispered, almost right in my face.

"True.. But when I kiss you.. you do almost the same thing," I said, and then kissed him softly right back.

We leaned back on the couch, having one of those movie make-out moments, when the lights went out.

Make it more movie like, why don't you? What's next? Jason coming through the door and killing us?

Aaron pushed my head farther into the couch. "Hold on," I muttered. He pulled away.

"Huh?"

"Did you not notice how funny it'd be if Jason came through the door and killed us?"

He looked at me like I was nuts. "It would?"

"Yes. It'd be just like a movie."

"Oh.. Riiight." He was still giving me that look.

"Oh stop it." I grabbed his neck and pulled him down, and kissed him again.

That led to many different places that children's—or adults, for that matter—eyes should wander, if you catch my drift..

* * *

It was maybe 1:00 AM. I was breathing hard. So was Aaron.

He kissed my sweaty neck, and I arched my back. After a few more small kisses, Aaron lay his head on my chest. I ran my fingers through his hair.

"I love you," I whispered.

"I love you, too, babe," he replied, running his hand over my waist.

Soon we were both asleep.

* * *

The sunlight was barely filtering through the windows, when I fell off the couch.

"WHOA! Argh!" I now had a nice view of the ceiling.

Aaron's head was now blocking that view. "Well, good morning to you, too," he said, smiling.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. My face is up here," I said, grabbing his chin and making him look at my face.

He grinned. "Maybe.."

"We are NOT starting this again." He laughed.

"What if I want to?" He raised his eyebrow.

"Well, I'm kinda.. NAKED."

"Really? I hadn't noticed."

"Fuck you, Aaron," I said tartly, crossing my arms.

"One, you shouldn't do that, and two, you wish." AGAIN with the eyebrows.

"And three, I did about five times last night. Four, STOP STARING!" He laughed at me more.

"Why should I?" he asked.

I propped up on my elbows. "Because I said so."

"That doesn't mean anything," Aaron said.

I hit him in the face with a pillow and stole the blanket that was around him, tucking it tightly around me.

"Make yourself useful and put some boxers on, and make us something to eat. I'm hungry," I said, stalking up the stairs. I could hear him following me.

"You love me," he pointed out.

"That proves nothing."

"Or does it?" I could practically hear him wiggling his eyebrows.

"Oh, you can bite my ass, honey," I quipped, ignoring the quirk in his voice.

"I'd rather just stare at it, but that sounds pretty appetizing."

I stopped walking, not turning around. "I dare you."

I felt a light nip, and turned, screaming, "YOU BIT MY ASS!"

"REALLY?"

"PSH." I turned into the hallway and closed my bedroom door, locking it. He knocked on it.

"Open up, Caitliiinnnn!" he whined. I cackled.

"No. I have to get dressed."

"I WANNA WATCH!"

I opened the door and threw a sock at him. "There. Wear that. I think you're getting cold."

He blushed and I closed the door again, pulling open drawers.

When I opened the door again, he had a towel wrapped around his waist. I looked at it. Hello Kitty. Nice choice.

"So.. You like Hello Kitty?"

"Pfffffffffshhhhht."

"AGH shut up."

"Make m—"

I covered his mouth. "Aaron, say make me, and I will personally strangle you."

".."

"That's what I thought," I said, releasing his mouth.

"You should get aggressive more often."

I smacked myself in the face. Of course. I sighed. "Aaron, Aaron, Aaron."

"What, what, what?" he asked.

"You're an idiot, idiot, idiot," I said, staring at him.

"I am not, am not, am not," he said back.

"Are too, are too, are too."

"Not, not, not."

"YES, YES, YES."

"NO, NO, NO."

This continued back and forth until he covered my mouth with his hand. "MPH, MPH, MPH."

"Oh, give it up already," Aaron told me.

"Mphk mhe."

"Can be arranged, honey," he said, and then pinned me under him. He started to tickle my sides, and I started screaming and wriggling underneath of him.

"Nooooooooo!" I screamed out, laughing. "I'm really ticklishhhh!"

"REALLY?!"

"EHHH FUCK YOUU!" I shouted, clawing at the bed.

"Ha." He tickled harder.

"I SURRENDER! MERCY! UNCLE! LET ME GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" I surrendered, or I was gonna pee myself from laughter, or die of asphyxiation, and he was going to lose his towel, which may be or may or may not prove to be a good thing.

He finally stopped tickling me, and let me catch my breath. I turned to him. "I hate you," I whispered.

"No you don't. You love me," he said, grinning.

I gasped. "SINCE WHEN!?"

"Since the day you met me." His grin turned smug.

"And how do you know that?" I was genuinely interested. He's odd, but he comes up with reasonable stuff every once in a while. And when I say once in a while, I MEAN ONCE IN A WHILE.

"Considering you couldn't talk when you looked at me, and I know you felt the electric current that hit when I accidentally—"

"Accidentally on PURPOSE."

"Shush. When I accidentally on purpose managed to run into you."

I propped up on my elbow. "Well, I think you were in love with me since the day you met me. And I knew I hadn't run into you!"

"And how do you figure that?" he asked, ignoring the fact that he'd run into me.

"I have no idea, but I could tell. It's just.. kinda.. I dunno. But I could.. feel it, I guess." It was weird, but true.

"You felt right then," he said, smiling.

"APPARENTLY." I sighed and rolled onto my back. "Aaron?"

"Yeah?"

I turned to look at him.

"Your Hello Kitty is showing."


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

At the current time, I was standing in the shower, thinking. About what? My mom.

I didn't know where she was, and you know what? I didn't really care. She could die, and I wouldn't shed a tear.

I sighed. It was maybe ten at night, and I'm pretty sure Aaron was asleep. He'd had a tough day at school. I did too, but I couldn't fall asleep. Typical.

Turning off the water, I stepped out of the shower and wrapped myself in a towel, and opened the door to my bedroom.

As expected, Aaron was lying across half of my bed, the sheets tangled around him, dead asleep. I smiled. He looked so peaceful when he was asleep. I tip-toed across my room to my drawers, trying not to wake him, when he said,

"Hello there."

I almost fell over.

"Hiiii. I thought you were sleeping," I said, digging through my drawer furiously.

"I was almost asleep. Thanks for waking me up with your notoriously loud tip-toeing," he muttered, turning over.

"Shut up."

"Make me."

I threw a shirt at him. He didn't move. I guess I made him shut up.

After getting dressed, I climbed into bed next to him. He threw the shirt at me. Typical. I threw it off the bed and snuggled close to him. He was warm.

Aaron wrapped his arm around me.

"Goodnight."

"I love you."

"Te quiero bebé," he said.

I smiled. I loved it when he spoke Spanish. I muttered in response. "Con todo mi amor."

Then we were both out like a light.

* * *

When I woke, it was dark-ish, and I was alone, with my face embedded in my pillow. There was a light coming from downstairs, and the sound of clanging pots and running water coming from the kitchen.

I got up slowly, and made my way downstairs. "Aaron?"

"In the kitchen," he called. Since when does he use the kitchen?

I padded over to the door, and peeked in. Aaron was cooking. Wow. It's a miracle. Aha! He's using a cookbook. Of course.

"'Cha makin'?" I asked, walking in.

"Be more elaborate, man." I stood next to him and rested my hands on the counter.

"The kind you eat," he responded, going to the stove.

I looked at the cookbook cos I'm that intelligent. "Ooh. Lasagna."

"Goddamnit." He laughed. "I forgot you could read."

I grabbed a nearby spoon and smacked him. "I'm amazed you can read."

"Hey! That hurt. And that was mean." His face was a mask of mock sadness.

"Don't you even give me that puppy dog face, Aaron. It doesn't work on me." ..Okay.. It doesn't work for anyone BUT him. Anyone else can beg me until they die and it won't work. He can beg for like, two minutes, and I'll crack. It's sad.

"Yes it does." He gave me one of those wicked smirks.

"Fine. Maybe it does, but don't you even start with me. I have a spoon and I am not afraid to use it, mister." I waved the spoon around as I said this.

He pulled out a fork. "And I have a fork. So don't you even go there." I could tell he was struggling to keep a straight face as he said this.

I smacked him with the spoon. "Oh yeah! I went there!" I said, mocking Hannah Montana.

"You so should not have gone there," Aaron said, with a gay lisp, and poked me with the fork. I smacked him. He poked me. I smacked him, he poked me.

By now, we were trying to kill each other with kitchen utensils.

SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.

We both turned around. Oh. Shit.

The pot of water had boiled over and there was water everywhere and a lot of sizzling going on. I started laughing hysterically while Aaron ran to turn off the stove.

He turned around to glare at me. "It's not funny!"

"Yes it is!"

"Okay, maybe a little."

I grinned and kissed him on the lips, turning on the small TV we had in the kitchen.

I was staring at the screen, but not really watching it. My mind was someplace else.

I knew that I was too happy, and that I was gonna crash soon. It's always what happened. I just hope Aaron wasn't here to see it when it actually happened.

I was jolted out of my thoughts by Aaron placing a plate of Lasagna in front of me.

"Gah."

"You okay?" He looked worried.

"I'm alright. Just thinking.. Oh, by the way, I never got to ask how your day was yesterday. You just kinda.. died.. when we got home," I said, cutting into my food.

"My day was pretty boring. Except this one kid asked everyone "Can I punch you in the face?" every time he spoke to them. It was hysterical." I started laughing at the "Punch you in the face" part. "What's so funny?"

"Punch - you - in - the - face?" I choked out between giggles.

"Yes. Speaking of.. Can I kick you in the face?" I could tell he was struggling to keep a straight face.

I thought of something to say. "Can I smother you with my chest?"

"Yes."

And that was the end of our fuses. We just burst out laughing. Total screaming laughter. The people next door probably thought that someone was being murdered. I was laughing so hard I couldn't breathe, and Aaron's face was turning red.

"Oh wow," I said once we'd finally stopped laughing. "I haven't laughed that hard in forever."

"Me either," Aaron said.

We'd both dropped our forks and had nearly choked on lasagna.

"Smother me with your chest?" He snorted. "Seriously?"

"Yes. Seriously."

"Oh, what a way to die," Aaron said happily, which sent us into another round of laughing.

* * *

After dinner, we were in the living room, watching The Uninvited. Aaron had a bowl of strawberries on his lap. I turned to him.

"Yo, dude. Give me a strawberry."

"Okay." He threw one at me, and it hit me smack dab in the middle of the chest. He covered his mouth and snickered.

"No. I mean.. not in my boobs. I mean my mouth, you dip shit!" I opened my mouth.

He threw. He missed. This one hit my head. "WHAT PART OF MOUTH DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND?!"

"No comprendé," he said, smirking.

"Will you comprendé it when I steal your strawberries?" I threatened.

"Nuuuuu. Don't steal my strawberries."

"Yee. I'm gonna steal yer strawberries."

I stood up, ready to attack. He brought his leg up and sheltered the bowl.

"Don't touch my strawberries." He looked hilarious.

"What if I do?" I asked, my hands on my hips.

"Uhm.. I'll.. I dunno. But don't touch them." He looked like I'd threatened to give him a vasectomy.

I bent over the chair so I was eye level with him. "Can I please have a strawberry, Aaron?"

He blinked. ".."

"Please?"

I took the other half, and bit through it, kissing him in the process. I stood up completely and walked to the kitchen to fetch some Pepsi.

"SUCCESS!" I squealed.

I could hear Aaron's roaring laughter in the living room. And then the sound of glass breaking. And then,

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! MY STRAWBERRIES!"

I opened the kitchen door to find Aaron sitting on the couch, staring at the broken bowl in disbelief.

I grabbed my camera, and snapped a picture. Blackmail is a wonderful thing. Putting it in the cabinet, I asked, "Having difficulties?"

"MY. STRAWBERRIES."

"What about them?"

"THEY'RE ON THE FLOOR!"

"Yes. Yes they are."

"WHY?!"

"You dropped them?" I sipped at my Pepsi.

"But - they - but - my - but - berries!" he stuttered, still staring at the glass and berries.

"Your butt berries?" I asked, snorting. He frowned.

"THIS IS YOUR FAULT!" Insert facedesk here.

"My fault? I was getting Pepsi."

"You stole my strawberry and then you broke it," he said, looking like he was gonna cry.

I stepped over the mess and sat next to him, taking his hand in mine. "Aaron, I didn't steal it, you shared it. You dropped it because you can't get ahold of yourself while laughing about Strawberry Success." I patted his thigh. "Honey.. Get over it."

"Meh," he said quietly.

"Idiot."

"You love me," Aaron muttered, ignoring the food on the floor, which I would surely force him to pick up later.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," I said, laying my head in his lap.

I guess I fell asleep for a while, because I woke up in my bed next to Aaron some time later, and it was pitch black out. I lay in bed for at least two hours trying to fall back to sleep. No such luck.

I yawned.

It was maybe one in the morning, and I just absolutely couldn't sleep. I had chills, and a runny nose, and I kept coughing like I had a hair-ball. How in the hell had I managed to get like this in four hours or so? I was actually thinking about taking a hand-full of sleeping pills so I could sleep, but I knew I couldn't cos of one thing: Aaron. I knew he wouldn't like it at all.. but..

I WANTED SLEEP SO BAD.

Aaron had no idea I was still up. He was in a total k.o. Which was so completely and utterly unfair. I deserved sleep. I mean, he did too, but c'mon people! I'm so tired.

I got out of bed and went over to my computer, yawning the whole time.

After turning it on and getting online, I sat down.

I was typing some more on the story I was writing when a voice said,

"Can't sleep?"

and I jumped about a foot in the air. Roaring laughter sounded from behind me, and Aaron came up behind me and put his hands on my shoulders.

"I apologize for scaring the shit out of you, but you woke me up when you got out of bed," he said, starting to rub my shoulders.

I started typing again, waiting for my heart to stop beating like mad.

"Sorry 'bout that. I'm just being all insomniac-ish again," I muttered, staring at the screen.

There was no light in my room other than the light radiating from the computer screen, so my room looked quite interesting in the pale glow.

"What're you typing?" Aaron asked, sitting down beside me.

"A story I'm working on," I replied, still typing, and trying not to look at him.

I didn't want to look at him because: A) He'd see how miserable I was. B) I looked like crap. C) He'd see that I'd been crying. D) I didn't really feel like being seduced or coerced into telling him what was wrong.

"What's it about?"

"Hmm?" I'd spaced off while thinking about why I didn't wanna look at him.

"What's your story about?" he asked a second time.

"Oh. Right. Stuff."

"That's too vague," Aaron said, patting my thigh.

"It's about me and you," I said, surrendering.

"Oh, really?"

"Yes. Really."

He put his hand on top of mine and stopped my typing. A line of kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk went across the screen. He grasped my chin and turned me to look at him.

"You've been crying," he said quietly. "Your eyeliner is smeared everywhere."

I turned my head away. "I'm fine. It's just from sleeping."

"No, it's not. Why were you crying?" he asked, turning my head to face him again.

"Just thinking," I murmured.

"About?"

I'd turned to fully face him by now. "Well.. I can't sleep, so there's that. But then.. my thoughts went out of control. And.. stuff.. happe.. never.. So I started crying. And.. I'm sorry that I'm being .." I trailed off.

"Being what?" In the light from the screen I could see that he was staring at me. Directly at me.

"I don't know a good word for it. But I'm sorry."

He hugged me to his chest tight. "You're not doing anything wrong," Aaron said, kissing the top of my head. "I love you."

"I love you, too," I whispered, and wiped my eyes. "I just feel bad for being all sad, because I'm good at bringing other people down with me when I get like this.. And it usually.. Nev.."

"It's fine. Don't worry about it." He wiped my eyes. "C'mon. Try and go back to bed."

I yawned. "Alright." I shut the computer and crawled back in next to Aaron. I lay my head on his bare chest and wrapped my arms around him. He was so warm. I kissed his chest. "I love you."

"I love you too."

I really hope this isn't the beginning of a breakdown.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

Aaron and I were sitting on the couch, doing nothing except staring at each other. Don't call me corny. The TV had died, it seems.

"Feed me."

He laughed. "I'll make the sandwich, but you're feeding yourself."

"Should I fear for my life since you're making the food?" I asked, walking into the kitchen with him.

"It depends."

"Psht."

After Aaron made my sandwich, we were sitting at the table. I poked it.

"You sure it's not poisoned with Lysol or something?" I poked it again.

"You really think I'd poison you?" He looked hurt.

"Sometimes, I don't know." I raised my eyebrows.

"Do I even have to take a bite to prove it to you?" Aaron asked.

"If it is poisoned, you know where to bite," I pointed out.

"Do I have to take a bite off of every edge then?" He sounded exasperated.

"Yes. Yes you do."

He picked it up and took a bite off one corner. He was fine. He bit off three others and was fine. He bit the middle, and then he put it down, blinked, and went wide eyed and fell on the floor.

Aaron sat up and looked at me over the table. "COME ON. Eat the damn thing already!"

I glared. "It's contaminated though."

He shot me a look and I said, "All right, all right!" I picked it up and took a bite. It didn't taste like it had Lysol. At least.. I didn't.. think.. it did..

"Taste any lysol?" he asked mockingly.

"No. But I taste some Windex," I joked.

"And how's that taste?" Aaron asked, sounding interested.

"Clean."

We started laughing then. Tastes clean? Really.

"Clean. Never heard of that taste. Maybe they should make it into an ice cream flavor," Aaron suggested. I laughed again.

"Yes; Windex Ice Cream: So Shiny You Can't Even See Your Teeth!" We started laughing again.

"We could make millions with this," he said.

"Ha! We could be the Windex Ice Cream Enterprises."

God, we are stupid.

* * *

It was maybe four in the morning, and I had just woken up. Aaron and I were asleep on the couch, and he was on the outside.

I was staring at the ceiling when I realized I really had to sneeze.

"Ah.. Ah.. Ah.. Ah.. AHHH CHOOOOOO!" The sound I made was more of a high pitched squeal-scream thing.

Aaron yelled and fell off the couch.

"AGHHH!"

I continued to sneeze several more times - twenty four to be exact - and I saw that Aaron had his hands over his head like we were under a bomb attack.

Once I was done, he raised his head.

"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!"

"I had to sneeze.." I said, rubbing my nose.

"That was not a sneeze. That was an .. I don't know what that was. But don't do it again, or I'm gonna die of a heart attack or something," Aaron said, his eyes the size of an orange.

I just burst out laughing. "The - look - on - your - face!"

"Shut. UP." He got back on the couch.

"Ahaha!"

"What part of shut up do you not get?" he asked, pushing me over a little and laying face first into the pillow.

"The shut up part."

"Apparently."

"Oh calm down. It's not my fault my nose is retarded," I said, putting my hand on his back.

"Bleh," he muttered into the pillow.

"I love you, too," I told him, and kissed his head.

He mumbled into his pillow and I put my arms around him.

"Now shut up and go to sleep."

I caught a mumbled "Screw you" out of his pillow, and said,

"You wish."

He lifted his head. "I don't have to wish."

"..As I said, shut up and go to sleep."

"Bleh."

"Bleh back."

"BLAH."

"Shut up and go to sleep."

"Fine."

I'm just saying, Aaron snores, but not so loud that my thoughts can't drown it out.

I began to ponder when my mind's blockade that Aaron had seemed to create would wear down and break. It could be now, tomorrow, or two weeks from now.. And that's what scared me. I just really, really hoped Aaron didn't see me in that state.. Especially if the voices showed up.

I sighed and moved closer to Aaron, inhaling his scent, and letting go of everything, making my way into dreamland.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

On Monday morning, I didn't feel very good, so I told Aaron to just go on ahead, and I'd be waiting when he got back.

"You alright?" He asked, surveying me, curled up on the couch and staring blankly at a spot on the wall.

"Yeah. I'm just a little under the weather, that's all," I assured him, not really paying attention.

I jumped when he was suddenly in front of me. He placed his hand over mine. "Caitlin, are you really okay?" I looked at him. His eyes were filled with worry, and were searching mine for answers, which I knew he wouldn't find. My mind had gone on lock down.

"Yeah. I'm okay." No. I wasn't.

"Are you lying to me?" He wasn't angry or anything. Just worried. Yes.

"No. I'm okay." I smiled. "Really."

He seemed hesitant. "Alright.." He leaned in, and kissed me slowly. "I love you."

"I love you too, Aaron," I whispered, kissing him again.

"I've gotta go or I'm gonna be late," he muttered, reluctantly pulling away and grabbing his keys. "I'll see you at three." I hope I see you, too.

"Bye," I said quietly, and watched the door close, waiting for the lockdown to break.

_ _ _

All day, the only thing I thought about was if Caitlin was alright. The worst possible scenarios went through my head. She could be hurt. She could be dead. She could have hurt herself. Her dad could have shown up.

I finally succumbed to my thoughts, and called the house at lunch.

No answer.

I dialed again.

No answer.

..Hopefully.. she's asleep. I didn't let my mind wander any further than that, or I'd never make it through the end of the day.

When the bell rang, I all but sprinted to my car and got in, dialing the house once more.

No answer. This is bad.

* * *

I was tingling, and yet I was still in pain. I can't feel my fingers. Everything's blurry.. I'm cold. It hurts.

_ _ _

It had just begun to rain when I pulled up to the house, barely taking the time to yank my keys out of the ignition. Something was wrong. I could feel it.

I all but threw the door open, throwing my stuff on the floor, calling out for Caitlin. I didn't get a reply.

"Caitlin?" I asked, moving to the bottom of the stairs. My heart was starting to palpitate. Something was very wrong.

I dashed up the stairs, stopping at the top. All of the doors were closed, and there were no lights on in any of them. I had no choice but to open all of them. She wasn't in her moms room, the guest bedroom, the wash room, or her room. The only room left was the bathroom. I knocked. "Caitlin..?"

Once again, no answer.

I barely opened the door when I was hit with the extreme smell of blood. FUCK.

Pushing it open, I found Caitlin, sitting in the tub, blood everywhere. There was no water, but there was so much liquid in there with her, I could have thought there was. Shitshitshitshitshitshit. No.

All I could see was red. I didn't know one person had that much blood.

Numbly, I reached for my phone and dialed 911.

"911, what's your emergency?"

"I need an ambulance on 911, Clark Street. Number 9450."

"Ambulances will be there right away, sir."

I snapped the phone shut and something in me clicked.

"Caitlin? Caitlin? Babe?" I shook her shoulder, and got no response. She was cold; freezing, actually.

"SHIT!" I shouted, grabbing two washcloths and wrapping them around her wrists and arms,

"Nnngh," she mumbled, moving her head a little.

"Caitlin?" I asked again, grasping her chin. "Can you hear me?"

Her eyelids fluttered a little, and her eyes rolled back into her head slightly. "Aaron?"

"I'm right here." I hope you stay here, with me.

"..I'm..sorry," she said, her eyes rolling all the way back into her head.

"No. C'mon, wake back up," I said frantically, shaking her. "Please. Wake up."

I didn't get an answer, and I could feel hot tears welling up. Where the fuck is the ambulance?!

Not waiting, I picked her up, and ran down the hallway. Making sure not to hurt her any more, I sprinted down the stairs, skipping three at a time, and threw open the front door. The ambulance had just torn into the driveway, narrowly missing my car.

I could feel warm blood on my arm, which felt different from the chilly feel of Caitlin's skin.

I didn't really pay attention to what they were doing. All I did was stare at Caitlin, silently willing her to wake back up.

I did notice when they tried to take her from me. I refused to let them, and put her on the gurney myself, and then climbed into the back with her.

Not being able to watch as they pulled the washcloths from her arms and wrists, I turned away, wiping my eyes. Why, why, why, why, why?! I shouldn't have left today. I knew she was lying to me, but I didn't think this was gonna happen. This is all my fault.

I heard a sharp intake of breath from the EMT who had peeled them back. They were completely red by now. I don't get why she hadn't stopped bleeding yet.

"What happened?" the EMT asked quietly, pressing large amounts of gauze to her left arm, which was exuding the most amount of blood.

"What does it look like?" I snapped, grabbing a handful of gauze and pressing it to her other wrist. She was so pale.

"It looks like she tried to find a way out." I glared.

"A way out of what, exactly?" Is he suggesting that I hit her or something?

He ignored that. "Anything wrong in your relationship?"

"No. There wasn't. And if you're suggesting I hurt her in any way, I swear.." I trailed off.

"I'm not. I was just asking. We usually don't see these this bad."

"Yeah.. She.. uhm.. knows what she's .. doing," I whispered.

"Nnnghh." Caitlin had apparently come back into somewhat of a conscious state.

"Caitlin?" I leaned in towards her. Her eyes opened slightly.

"Aaron.."

"I'm right here. You're on your way to the hospital." I was crying again, but I didn't really give a damn.

"No," she protested quietly. "No. Take me back. Leave me there."

I put my hand gingerly on her face. "Why?"

"I don't want to be here anymore," she mumbled.

I looked up at the EMT. He looked grief-stricken. "How much longer?" I asked quickly.

"Two minutes maximum," he said, changing the gauze, for the first wad was no longer usable.

"Babe, why don't you wanna be here anymore?" I asked her quietly, trying to keep her awake.

"I'm tired of it." ..Of me?

"What about.. Me?" I asked quietly, wiping away the light sheen of sweat on her face.

"You.. I love you, Aaron," she whispered, her eyes starting to roll again.

"Stay with me, Caitlin," I told her, kissing her forehead.

"I'm sorry. Don't forget," she mumbled, and her eyes closed again.

"No. Caitlin, come on. Wake up," I begged, not caring that the EMT was right there next to me. "Come on, babe. Wake up. Please."

"We're here," the EMT chimed in, changing the gauze a third time. "Hold this for me. We're gonna be walking fast, and you probably won't be allowed in her room."

"Why not?" I demanded, angrily wiping away my tears. "I'm the closest thing to family that she's got."

He didn't answer, and opened the doors.

Everything else happened so fast that I couldn't tell what was going on and who was going where.

All I knew was that if I lost Caitlin..

No. Don't think about that.

I sat in a plastic chair staring a hole in the floor for God knows how long before a doctor came out to see me, grim faced. Oh God. She's dead. She'sdeadshe'sdeadshe'sdead.

"Excuse me, are you the one who arrived with Ms. Evans?" she asked, sitting down across from me, probably already knowing the answer.

"Her name is Caitlin," I said in a monotone, still looking at the floor.

"Well, we almost couldn't stabilize her. There were at least two hundred lacerations on her each wrist alone. Probably five hundred all together. She lost more blood than most people can survive without." I cringed. She really had done damage. "We aren't sure if she caused any nerve damage or not. She hurt herself pretty bad." She paused. "Are you alright?"

I looked up at her. She looked genuinely concerned. "To be honest, what do you think? The .. I can't say love of my life, because I love her more than that.. but.. My girlfriend just tried to kill herself, and I'm the one who had to find her. How do you think I am?"

"I'm sorry." I sighed.

"It's not your fault. I'm just.. I'm scared," I muttered, running my hands through my hair. "When can I see her?"

"Right now, if you'd like," the doctor said, standing up.

I followed her to Caitlin's room. Cringing, I entered the room.

She was hooked up to several tubes, and there were bandages up to her elbow on both arms. She was asleep, and she looked peaceful. "I'll leave you two alone."

I ignored her and sat next to the bed and lay my head next to hers on the pillow. Running my hand down her face, minding the tubes, I whispered, "Te quiero, bebé."

In my head, I could hear her voice saying, "Con todo mi amor."


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

My head felt heavy, and I felt like I was a thousand pounds of pure lead. If this was death, I didn't like it. What happened to pearly gates and blazing fires? No one said anything about being stuck in limbo and feeling like you have a dump truck situated on you.

That's when I noticed the incessant beeping coming from the left of me, and the feel of an oxygen tube in my nose. No. I'm not in the hospital. It's my imagination. No.

I slowly opened my eyes, trying to adjust to the bright-as-hell fluorescent lightning. Fuck. I'm in the hospital!

Without my own permission, I started getting panicky. I could hear my heartbeat quicken on the monitor, and my eyes started darting around the room, taking everything in, while my breathing quickened pace.

"Caitlin?"

I screamed when someone called out my name, because I hadn't seen them there.

"Babe, it's just me," Aaron murmured, putting his hand on my face. I immediately felt my heart-rate slow back down, and my breathing speed decrease. "Do I need to get Dr. Smith?"

"No they won't," he said, turning me to look at him fully. There were deep bags under his eyes, which were bloodshot. And he looked more pale than a Hispanic should ever be.

"Wh - why do you look like that?" I asked, confused on why he looked so.. dead.

"Because I haven't left your side in three days," he told me, pressing a kiss to my nose.

"You haven't?" I was astonished. "Why?"

"Because I love you. So much." He sighed. "Why did you.. Why didn't you call me, Caitlin?" He sounded.. hurt.

My lip trembled. "I - I didn't want you to see that, Aaron." My voice broke. "It was awful before.. I got.. the razor.."

"And it wasn't awful after?" His voice broke too.

I was silent. Oh, no. "Y - you're the one who found me?" That wasn't supposed to happen.

"Who else?" he whispered, looking into my eyes. "There was so much blood, Caitlin."

I inhaled shakily. "I.. I didn't know you'd be home so early.. I di - I didn't.."

"Shh. It's okay," he whispered, placing a finger over my lips. I searched his eyes. All I could see was my reflection.

"No it isn't," I mumbled against his finger. "You shouldn't have had to see that."

"I said it was okay." He removed his finger and pressed his lips to my own, and then pressed his forehead to mine. "It's okay, Caitlin."

"I'm sorry," I whispered, closing my eyes and pressing my nose to his.

"Do you remember anything?" I opened my eyes, to find his golden eyes staring into my own.

"Not after.. I remember being cold.. and not being able to feel.." I felt a tear slip down my cheek. Aaron's finger brushed it away.

"You don't remember talking to me, do you?" he asked, continuing to brush each tear away.

"I - I talked to you? When?" I don't remember. What .. What did I say to him?

"You told me you were sorry, and that you.." He sighed. "You said, quote on quote.. 'No. No. Take me back. Leave me there. I don't want to be here anymore.' When I asked why, you said you were .. tired of it. And when I asked about.. me.. You told me you loved me.. And once again, that you were sorry.. And for me.. to not forget.. and passed back out," he whispered, looking down.

This brought on a fresh wave of tears. "I'm sorry," I said. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!"

"Calm down. Shh, shh. It's okay." He kissed my lips and then kissed my forehead. "You have nothing to be sorry for." I stared in disbelief.

"Nothing to be sorry for?" I whisper-yelled. "I've probably imprinted the image of me like that in your head forever."

He sighed and closed his eyes. When he re-opened them, they were glossy with unshed tears. "I don't care about that. All I care about is whether you're safe and alive. I thought I'd lost you." His voice cracked. "It's all my fault."

"What?! No! It's.." I didn't know how to tell him about the fact that I hear voices in my head.

"I shouldn't have left for school," he continued, not acknowledging the fact that he'd heard me at all. "I knew you had lied to me, and yet I still left. I should have stayed with you. I -"

"No, Aaron. Stop," I wiped a tear from my cheek. "I didn't plan anything I did. I knew it'd happen sooner or later. I was hoping I'd be fine when you got home. But the voices—"

Aaron cut me off. "Voices?!"

It got very quiet very quickly. I stopped talking—maybe even breathing—and the only sound in the room was my heart monitor, which was beeping incessantly again to the rhythm of my heart.

"Voices?" Aaron repeated quietly.

"I—never mind," I mumbled, looking down at Aaron's fingers, which were interlocked with my own.

"Babe," he said, making me look at him. "What. Voices?" He punctuated each word and made it sound like a sentence of its own.

"In my head," I said, barely above a whisper. I could see the fear flicker in his eyes. It said to me: She's worse than I thought.

"What do they say to you?" His voice cracked at the end.

"They tell me to do things," I answered, doing everything I could not too look at him. "To hurt myself." I was starting to cry. "That's why I did what I did! They wouldn't shut up! They were nagging and nagging and I felt like my mind was being torn apart!" I screwed my eyes shut. "I was curled up in a little ball in the bathtub screaming, "SHUT UP!" I was sobbing so hard I could barely understand myself. "Aaron, they wouldn't stop! I didn't want to do it, Aaron, I didn't!"

"I know, I know," he said, trying to calm me down.

I ripped at the bandages. "I DIDN'T MEAN TO! I DIDN'T MEAN TO DO THIS TO YOU!"

I felt his hands close over my wrists. "Breathe. Caitlin, breathe. C'mon. With me now. Inhale and exhale," he said, trying frantically to calm me down. "Can I get a doctor in here?!"

I could see blood starting to seep through Aaron's fingers, and my breathing quickened. "What did I do? What did I do!? I'M SORRY!"

"Caitlin, babe, c'mon, stop crying. Please." I looked into his eyes as best as I could with all of the tears blurring my vision. His eyes were pleading with me.

I couldn't answer because my eyes widened. "A - Aaron.." My head started to buzz. When I tore off the bandages, I must have opened every single wound on my wrist, because there was a lot of blood going through Aaron's fingers and down my arms. I blinked hazily.

"I NEED A DOCTOR!" Aaron shouted, releasing my wrists and pushing them into the blankets to try and halt the bleeding.

A woman and about twelve men in scrubs came flying through the door, and that's the last thing I remember, because I then fell into a pool of black.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten**

I got dragged from the room and taken into a bathroom to wash my hands free of Caitlin's blood, which was all over my hands and arms. How can one person bleed that much?

All that ran through my head while pink water ran down the drain was everything she'd screamed.

_I DIDN'T MEAN TO! I DIDN'T MEAN TO DO THIS TO YOU!_

I shook my head, as if that would get the voice out of my head, and her eyes, screaming apologies at me.

_I'M SORRY!_

I left the bathroom and returned to the waiting room, and returned to staring at the hole I was trying to glare into the floor.

_I was curled up in a little ball in the bathtub screaming, "SHUT UP!"_

Rubbing my temples, I screwed my eyes shut tight and willed her voice to get out of my head; to leave me alone, just for now. I didn't need to hear it repeated.

I must have fallen asleep at some point, because Dr. Smith woke me up with a grim expression on her face. Shit.

"What's wrong? What happened?" My mind flipped to the worst possible scenarios. They couldn't stop the bleeding. She made it even worse. She's been put in a locked up room.

Dr. Smith, once again, sat across from me. "We have her in stable condition yet again, but.." But? But? What but? "We've had to restrain her arms, so another episode like the last doesn't happen again." I blinked. Restrain her arms?

"I—I'm sorry," I said, not really knowing what I was apologizing for.

Dr. Smith smiled a sad smile at me. "Do you know why she broke down like she did?"

Her voice came rushing back into my mind.

_I'M SORRY! I DIDN'T MEAN TO DO THIS TO YOU!_

"She.. I don't know." I shook my head again, trying to rid my head of her voice.

Her pleading brown eyes infiltrated my mind, and I cringed.

"Something wrong?" I gave Dr. Smith a "What-the-Fuck-Do-You-Think?!" look, and she mumbled, "Sorry."

"H - how long do you think it'll take for the deep cuts to heal?" I asked quietly.

"Well, the deepest lacerations are nearly an inch deep —" cringe "— so up to a month-and-a-half, probably," Dr. Smith rattled off, her voice sounding staccato in the nearly empty waiting room.

"And where are the deep ones at?" I wasn't one hundred percent sure if I wanted to know, but I had a pretty good idea of where they were at.

"Well.. she has five running down her wrists, and those are about half an inch deep, but there is a single line going down each arm. Those are the deepest ones. The scars won't be pretty." I blinked while this settled in. I knew the "Cutter's Poem." Go across the stream, not down the flow, or up to heaven you'll surely go. She really had come close to.. No. Don't think about it.

A loud shriek pierced through the silence, and I recognized it as Caitlin's.

"AA-RON!"


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven**

Dr. Smith had to sprint to keep up with me as I tore out of my chair and down the hall to Caitlin's room.

When I flung the door open, she was screaming, "LET ME GO!" and straining against the straps around her arms. "DON'T HURT HIM!" she shrieked. She was having a night terror.

Dr. Smith had gone to hold her front down, while I grabbed her legs and pinned them down. I watched as she injected Caitlin with some sedative. Almost immediately she stopped struggling. I could see tears running down her face; she was crying in her sleep.

Dr. S. sighed. "Incase that happens again—which it shouldn't—why don't you sleep in here for the rest of the night?"

"Yeah. I think it's probably better for both hers and my sanity." I smiled a weak smile and heaved myself onto the badly upholstered couch.

"I'll go get you a blanket," Dr. S. said, and rushed out of the room. I turned to stare at Caitlin, of whom still had tears running down her face.

As soon as the Dr. left the room after dropping off a blanket for me, I got up and wiped Caitlin's tears.

"Te quiero bebé," I whispered in her ear, and kissed her forehead.

"Con todo mi amor," she mumbled back. I looked down in surprise. She hadn't woken up; she had answered me in her sleep. I smiled a little; it felt weird on my face.

I sighed and lay back down.

_ _ _

In the morning, I was woken up by Caitlin calling my name. It wasn't very light out, so I figured it was around five in the morning.

I was by her side in an instant. She was awake this time.

"Aaron?" she asked, her eyes shining in the dark.

"I'm right here," I said, intertwining my fingers with hers as best as I could.

"Wh - why do they have me locked up?" She sounded frightened; terrified, really. It struck a string in my heart.

"Babe, we don't want you to hurt yourself anymore."

"I - I don't know why I did that yesterday. I'm sorr—" I put my hand over her mouth.

"Please, please don't apologize anymore." I still hadn't rid myself of her screaming apologizes from the day before. They'd haunted me in my dreams.

"Why?" she asked through my hand, which I then removed from her mouth.

I decided against telling her the real reason why. She'd have another breakdown over having a breakdown. "Just.. please, don't. You have nothing to be sorry for, and don't tell me otherwise, Caitlin, because I won't listen to it." Her eyes glistened in the small shaft of light coming through the window, but she said nothing, and I released a breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding.

I put one hand on her face and kissed her nose, and lay my head next to hers on the pillow. "You know, it may take nearly two months for those to heal," I said, looking at her arms, which were tied down, making sure not to re-open anything or let her re-open anything. I could see her eyes widen in the dark.

"Two months?" she whispered, awestruck.

"Yeah. You really did some damage to yourself." I kissed her nose again, and brushed away the tear that threatened to fall. "You really had me scared that I was gonna lose you." I really didn't like showing any proof that I was scared/afraid/upset, but I honestly couldn't help it with Caitlin. I felt a warm tear slip down my cheek and wiped it away furiously, hoping she hadn't noticed it.

"..Are.. are you crying?" she whispered. Of course she noticed.

"No; I'm fine," I said, trying to hold back any others that I wasn't sure were there or not.

"You're lying to me," she said, her voice level. "I can tell. You're crying." It wasn't a question. It was a statement.

"I'm not crying. It was one tear," I said, closing my eyes. When I re-opened them, she was staring at me.

"Please don't cry over anything I do," Caitlin said, still looking at me. "I'm not worth it, Aaron." I blinked.

"That's a hard request," I told her, running my thumb over her cheek. "When I found you, I cried more than I think I have in my whole life."

"Oh, Aaron.." She blinked away tears, for she couldn't wipe them. "You did?"

"Yeah, as much as it makes me sound like a wimp." I laughed a hollow laugh. She smiled a hollow smile.

"Not a wimp. Someone who cares about the one they love more than words can express," Caitlin said quietly. "I love you forever; I like you for always. As long as I'm living, in my heart you will be."

I smiled, and closed my eyes.

Apparently I fell asleep right there, because I was woken up by Dr. Smith when the sun was finally in the sky. She had a smile on her face.

"Hey," she said, trying to stay quiet, for Caitlin was sleeping soundly. "You guys have a good conversation?"

"Yeah," I mumbled while she led me back to the couch. "She told me a poem."

"Yeah? Which poem?"

"I love you forever; I like you for always. As long as I'm living, in my heart you will be." She smiled, and put the blanket over me.

"How sweet. Well, I'll leave you guys to sleep for a while."

"Mmph," I mumbled, already half asleep.

Her pleading apologies didn't come back to invade my dreams.

_ _ _

Caitlin had been in the hospital for nearly two weeks with arm restraints. Today was the day they were to be taken off. She couldn't open her wounds anymore with the brush of a finger.

Her eyes were shining with tears while Dr. S. took the restraints off. "Why're you crying?" I whispered.

"I'm happy I'm getting these fucking things off," she whispered back, smiling. It was one of the first genuine smiles I'd seen in a long time. It made her a thousand times more beautiful than she already was. "God, it feels good to be able to move my arms again!" she exclaimed, startling the Dr.

We all started laughing.

"Well, this is nice," Dr. S. said, smiling. We both looked at her with a "Go Away Please?" look, and she coughed, and excused herself, which sent us into another round of laughter.

"So.. Whatcha wanna do today?" Caitlin asked, stretching her arms all over the place. I had to duck a few times to keep from getting hit in the face.

"Anything—" duck "—that doesn't involve—" duck "—you doing that!" I had to duck again, and she started laughing.

"I'm sorry. My arms hurt though, and my neck is killing me because I haven't been able to move most of my upper body." She whimpered when she arched her back, trying to loosen up the muscles.

"Here, turn around." I put my hands on her shoulders and started massaging her neck and upper arms.

"Ohh that feels niiiiice," she mumbled. "Who knew your hands were oh-so magical?" I snickered, and whispered in her ear.

"You did." She shivered.

"You know.. I thought we could stay in your room for today," I told her, continuing to work my "magic" on her sore muscles.

"But I—we—we've been in here for two weeks!" she protested, but I pressed a sensitive place on her neck, and she gasped. "I hate you."

I kissed her ear. "Love you too." She giggled. "I thought we'd listen to some music." I could practically hear the smile come across her face. She hadn't heard music in nearly three weeks. "I found some songs I think you'd like." She rested her head back against my chest, and puckered her lips. I gladly kissed them.

"So, what song first?" she asked me as I grabbed the small portable CD player out of the bag I'd brought.

"You'll see." I grinned and pulled her to her feet. She crashed into me. "Smooth," I laughed.

"Shut up and press play already!" I rolled my eyes and pressed play.

I grasped her hand and placed my own on her hip.

"I've been beaten down, I've been kicked around. But she takes it all for me." I kissed her nose. "And I lost my faith in my darkest days, but she makes me want to believe." I leaned down and whispered the chorus into her ear. "They call her love, love, love, love, love. They call her love, love, love, love, love. She's all I need."

I felt her press her lips to my collar bone, and I smiled.

All we did for nearly the whole day was dance in her room.

When it finally got to be around ten, Caitlin lay on the couch with me. She had her ear pressed to my chest, right over my heart.

"I get to go home next week," she said, playing with the bottom of my shirt. I desperately wanted her to pull it up and to feel her hands on my skin again. But I knew that couldn't happen for at least three more days. Damn.

"Which day?" I ran my hand through her hair.

"Dr. Smith said probably Tuesday." That was in three days, almost two. "Are you excited?" I felt her fingers slip underneath my shirt and dance along the waistband of my jeans. Oh, I was definitely excited. Tease.

"Uh huh," I mumbled, closing my eyes.

When she started to hum, I could feel it reverberate through my chest. "They call her love, love, love, love, love," I whispered to the melody she hummed.

"He is love, and he is all I need," she sang quietly, draping her arm across my waist. "And when that world slows down, dear, and when those stars burn out here; Oh, he'll be there. Yes, he'll be there."

"You know it's "she" right?" I whispered.

"Not in my world. Last time I checked, you are a guy." She giggled.

"Really?" I asked, my voice dripping with sarcasm. "So that's why I have a cock?"

"Yeah. THAT'S why." She snorted.

We cracked up with complete gut-wrenching laughter.

After we'd finished laughing, I looked over at the clock. 11:03.

"Shouldn't you be going to bed now, little lady?"

She scoffed. "What're you gonna do then? Film me?"

I flicked her in the head. "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

She pointed at me.

"Thanks." I smiled and kissed the top of her head before standing up, throwing her over my shoulder, and then depositing her on the bed.

"DON'T DAMAGE THE MERCHANDISE!" she squealed.

I leaned over her and pressed my forehead to hers. "I wouldn't damage anything on you."

"I know," she whispered, and then pressed her lips to mine.

It was another one of those firework explosions throughout my body. And especially to my lower-half. I wished with extreme force that we weren't in a hospital right then, but we were. Damn. I wanted to take it farther, but at that moment Dr. Smith walked in and cleared her throat. We pulled away from each other as fast as we could.

"I just came in to say goodnight to Caitlin, and to tell you that you ought to get home. You have school in the morning," she said to me, a grin coming across her face. I smiled sheepishly. "You have three minutes," she said, and then exited the room.

Caitlin snorted. "Psht."

"I'll see you tomorrow," I said, leaning back down over her.

"Yeah, but that's so far away!" she whined, placing her hands on the side of my face.

"Yeah, I know, but you'll probably be asleep for most of the time I'm gone." She squished my cheeks together. Which made the "So it won't be that long" I said next come out sounding like, "Sho eet wuunt bee dat lung." She giggled, and I stuck out my tongue and crossed my eyes, which only made her laugh harder, and squish my face harder. "Leet meeh gewww!"

"No."

"Yeeeeeshhh."

"Noo."

"Peash?"

"No."

"Whey newt?"

"Cos you look cute," she squealed, squeezing harder.

"New I dunt. I lewk feeny."

"You sound "feeny" too," she laughed, and I glared.

"Releesh mee."

"I shant "releesh" you." Caitlin grinned.

"Whey newt?"

"You asked that already."

"I dunt caare." She is evil.

"You love me."

"Dat prewves noodiing." I grasped her hands and pulled them from my face.

"Aww. You ruined my fun," she pouted, sticking out her bottom lip. I leaned in and kissed it. "Okay, nevermind."

I laughed. "Caitlin, Caitlin, Caitlin.." I kissed her again, and stood up, grabbing my bag. "I'll see you tomorrow."

I left as fast as I could so she couldn't find a way to pull me back in there, and I ran smack dab into Dr. Smith.

"Well, hello there!" she said, smiling. "In a hurry?"

I laughed nervously. "Trying to so Caitlin can't find a way to drag me back in there."

"Haha." She smiled even bigger. "Well, I've gotta get going. See you tomorrow." She brushed pass me and I just stood there with a WTF look on my face, I presume. Ooooooooookay then.

I made my way out of the hospital and to my car, tossing the bag into the back.

The drive home was quiet, except for the quiet music I had coming from the radio. I don't know how I managed it, but I started thinking about Caitlin's mom, Ms. Evans.

Apparently she'd called—and Caitlin hadn't told me—saying that she and Brandi—the evil little sister—had moved to Florida of all places, so the house was now in her care. Apparently all she had to do was pay the bills because the house was fully paid for—insert surprise here—and there were no more payments to make on it.

So I just wound up moving in, because like hell was going to live with my family. I'd done that for seventeen years. And when I have a place to go where I want to be, I'm going.

I parked in the driveway and made my way into the house, kicking off my shoes, and then proceeding to busy myself in the kitchen by trying to make myself a sandwich. Yes, I did say try. I finally gave up and had a bowl of cereal.

As Caitlin would say, _FAILURE_.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve**

The second I parked in the driveway, Caitlin flew out of the car and attacked her front door. When I made it up to where she was, she was screaming,

"I LOVE YOU HOUSE! I LOVE YOU DOOR! I LOVE YOU OLD BEAT UP PLANTS THAT I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE FUCK YOU ARE!"

I rolled my eyes and dragged her into the house.

"I LOVE YOUUUU!"

"Shut up! You're making a fool of yourself!" I laughed, closing the door behind us.

"Well, the neighbors can't see now, can they?" she asked, smirking.

"I guess not.." I leaned in to kiss her, but the next thing I knew, she was running away, cackling. "DAMN YOU!"

"What?! I'm hungry!" She popped her head out of the doorway that lead into the kitchen. "We can make kissy face later."

I smacked my palm into my face. Kissy face?

Making my way into the kitchen, I saw that Caitlin already had food spread out everywhere. I raised my eyebrow at her, seeing as she was on the counter with a package of pepperoni in her mouth.

She spit it onto the floor. "I'm making pizza. Don't judge!" I laughed.

"Can I judge when you fall off the counter?" She glared.

"I'm not gonna — WHOAAH!" I started laughing as she slipped and squealed, trying to get back onto the counter. "SHUT UP!"

"Don't rip the cabinets off the hinges!" I said through the laughter.

"If I do, I'll beat you with them."

Caitlin finally found her way off the counter, grabbing a large can of pizza sauce, and threatening to kill me with it. I just rolled my eyes and found the can opener.

"So, how're we doing this?" I asked, poking the package of whatever it was that she was going to make the dough out of. "Is this dough?" She looked at me incredulously and laughed.

"Yes, Aaron. It's dough. Now get me some damn flour!"

I fiddled around in the cupboard until I found what I think was flour. I held it up. "Is this flour?"

"Yes, Aaron. You are sometimes too dumb for words."

"Why thank you."

"Would you stop being so dumb and get me out four small bowls for the vegetables?" She tapped my nose with the wooden spoon in her hand, and I laughed.

"Yes, your highness."

"When the moon hits your eye - Like a big-a pizza pie - That's amore. When the moon hits your eye - Like a big-a pizza pie - That's amore!" she sang, washing a big green pepper. I just laughed and pulled out four small bowls and set them beside her. "Could you cut the pepperoni?"

"Isn't it already cut?"

She threw a giant log of meat at me. "DOES IT LOOK CUT TO YOU?!" She sounded like an army general.

"You're so weird," I said, pulling out a cutting board and beginning to slice the pepperoni.

"You love me."

"Yeah. I guess."

"Don't start this again," she muttered, starting to slice the vegetables.

I ignored her, trying not to chop off my finger, and hoping she didn't chop hers off either.

"Is this enough?"

She looked down at the slices on my board. "Perfect! Would you mind washing the boards while I get the flour and dough ready?"

She grabbed a plate and put it onto the counter, and then scooped the slices onto the plate and handed the boards to me.

I chuckled to myself as I watched her pull out the dough for the pizza crust. She set the bag of flour in the middle of the island to be sure it wouldn't get knocked over by accident. She reached under the island and pulled out a rolling pin. I stood next to her and leaned down on my elbows, watching her closely.

"You have to put flour on the roller and the dough so they won't stick to each other or the island," she explained. She moved the plate and bowls further down the counter. Caitlin opened the bag of flour and took a handful, sprinkling it over the countertop. "It's easier to get it on the dough this way." She took the ball of dough and pressed it into the flour, rolling it until the entire ball was covered, sprinkling flour on the rolling pin while she turned it with her other hand, and pressed the pin against the dough and started to flatten it out. She stopped a few times to sprinkle more flour on the rolling pin.

"I'm impressed," I said suddenly. She looked up, surprised, at me, waiting for me to continue. "Well, you've been sprinkling away and you only have flour on your hands and a little on your shirt. I doubt I could manage that."

"Come over here with me and let's find out."

"I want to eat sometime tonight. You better do it."

"Get over here before I go and collect you," She said, lifting an eyebrow at me.

I rolled my eyes, but came closer.

"Stick your hand in the bag and grab the flour. You're going to sprinkle it over the pin while I turn it."

I did as she asked and managed to keep the flour on the counter.

"See? That wasn't so bad."

I clapped my hands together, trying to get the flour off, and wound up sending a cloud of flower over my face and shirt. She stared at me, trying hard not to laugh. My brown eyes widened and I looked down at myself and then up at Caitlin. She couldn't hold it in any longer, and started laughing at me, clutching at her side as she shook hard from it.

I turned back towards the counter.

"Aa—A—Aaron ," she finally managed.

I turned to her, cocking my arm back and grinning. She instinctively closed my eyes and I threw the flour, watching it puff out over her face and neck. She blinked her eyes open to see me smiling wickedly at her. She wiped a finger against her cheek and held it out before her, realizing I had pelted her with flour. I started laughing at the bewildered look on her face.

She returned the wicked grin as she strode forward, locking me between her body and the counter. I honestly didn't object, until she pressed her cheek onto my shirt, returning a bunch of the flour I threw at her. I slid my hands down her waist and started tickling her, which made her back away.

"Great. Now we're puffy. I told you flour and I don't get along!" I said, sneezing from the flour that had proceeded to make its way up my nose.

"You're the one who clapped your hands to get it off you!" she protested, finishing the dough on her own.

"You're the one who didn't tell me not to clap my hands!" I growled, trying to pat some of the stupid-ass white stuff off of me.

She turned towards me. "Aaron, a rock would know not to do that!"

"A rock is an in-animate object, Caitlin."

"That's why it proves how dumb you are." She picked up the dough and twirled it around in the air. I strode over to where the package of flour was, and picked it up.

"..Did they spell flour wrong on the package? It doesn't say f-l-o-w-e-r." She dropped the giant dough-pancake on her head.

"SERIOUSLY?!" Peeling it off her head, she hit me with the wooden spoon again.

"WHAT?!"

"FLOWER? REALLY? Did you miss kindergarten through eleventh grade?" She resumed tossing it in the air until it was round.. I think.

"WHAT?! They spelled it wrong!"

"I give up!" she exclaimed, putting it on a tray and pouring the sauce onto the crust.

"..Doesn't the sauce have to be cooked first?"

"It's not spaghetti, Aaron."

She sprinkled cheese on it, and then dropped pepperonis over them, and finally covered them with peppers, onions, mushrooms, and olives. I wrinkled my nose.

"Ew."

"Ew?"

"You didn't tell me there were olives on it."

"You can pick them off?" She slid the pizza into the oven, and I glared at it.

"But that means I have to touch the fucking things."

"You can pick them off!" She threw her arms up and stalked into the living room.

I looked from the oven to the door, and dashed over to it, pulling it open. I grabbed a fork and started spearing the stupid little black things. I jumped when I heard Caitlin's footsteps. I slammed the oven shut and threw the fork.

It hit the ceiling and got stuck. "Fuck!" I whisper shouted.

Caitlin opened the kitchen door and I leaned on the counter, acting as causal as someone who had just thrown a fork covered in olives into the ceiling.

"..Whatcha doin'..?" She raised her pierced eyebrow.

"Watching the pizza bake," I said, looking at the oven.

"..Alrighty then.." Caitlin left and I pulled a chair into the middle of the kitchen, and got on the counter, reaching out for the fork in the ceiling.

"WHOA!" I screamed as I grabbed the fork, and fell off the counter. I popped up, and screamed, "GOT IT!" when Caitlin opened the door. I did the only thing I could. I shoved the fork in my mouth.

"Got what?"Caitlin asked.

Trying not to throw up, I spoke around the fork. "I got the fork."

".." She pulled the fork out of my mouth, which left me with a mouth full of olives. Gag. "What'd you do to it?"

"Nothing," I mumbled with my teeth closed. "Excuse me.." I flew into the living room and tore off towards the bathroom, spitting the olives in the toilet and squirting at least half a bottle, if not more, of toothpaste onto my toothbrush and attacking my teeth with it.

I meandered back into the kitchen and found Caitlin still standing there with the fork in her hand, when an olive fell off the ceiling, and landed on her head. My eyes widened. I didn't notice I'd left an olive up there.

I moved next to her, and pointed at the wall. "LOOK AT THAT!" She turned and I grabbed the olive and threw it at the wall, where it fell behind the cookbook rack.

"What the fuck was that?" she asked, running her hand over her hair.

"Nothing," I said too fast, leaning back on the counter.. and missing.

She stood over me. "Fail."


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen**

"WHERE THE FUCK ARE MY OLIVES?!" she shouted from the kitchen when the timer went off. I dove behind the couch as the kitchen door flung open. "AARON DANIEL SANCHEZZ!"

"Y—yes?" I asked, peeking over the sofa.

"WHERE ARE MY OLIVES?"

"They.. um.. melted..?"

She smacked her forehead with her palm. "You .. You.. GAH!" She stormed back into the kitchen, and I heard a loud bang and a "FUCK IT ALL!" I opened the door and peeked around it. There were pans everywhere, and she was holding a lone spatula.

"Having troubles?" I asked.

She glared daggers at me. "JUST A BIT." Kicking her way through the pans, she carried the pizza over to the table by the sliding glass doors and began to slice it.

I picked up the pans and shoved them into the cupboard and tied a towel around the handles, to make sure it didn't explode again.

When I sat down, I asked, "Is an olive a vegetable, or a fruit?"

Caitlin stopped cutting and looked up. "An olive, honey, is a vegetable."

"I thought so."

She flopped a piece of pizza onto my plate, and sat down.

I bit into it and immediately regretted it. "GAHHHHH HOTTTTT!"

Caitlin rolled her eyes and picked at her pizza.

I repeated the "GAHHHHH HOTTTTT!" phrase several times until the pizza cooled off enough.

"You know what?" Caitlin asked, staring at me over her pizza.

"Whaa?" I asked, cheese stuck to my chin.

"You are a sad excuse for a human, you know?"

"What does that make you?"

She aimed a sharp kick at my shin and I groaned.

"It makes me someone who can kick your ass." She smiled a gorgeous smile and resumed eating.

"You're evil."

"Thank you, darling."

The rest of the meal was finished in silence, except for the occasional glare over the table about the mysteriously disappearing olives.

_ _ _

Since the olives had disappeared while I was in the kitchen, I was forced to do the dishes while Caitlin watched TV.

When I opened the door to the living room I stopped where I was and my eyes widened. Caitlin was on the couch in sweatpants and a blue leopard print bra with black lace trim on. When she noticed me, she waved.

I picked my jaw up off the floor and went to sit next to her.

She crawled into my lap and lay her head on my chest. I snaked my arm around her waist. God, she's warm. She ran her index finger over my chest.

"I know that you took the olives off the pizza, you know," she said. I could practically hear the smile in her voice.

"And how do you know that?" I asked, a smile playing across my lips.

"An olive fell on my head, Aaron."

I snickered. "Sorry." I kissed the top of her head and ran a finger over her left forearm, where the scars were, including the still-healing lacerations. I felt her shiver, and I felt unspoken words drift between us.

Caitlin rolled off me and grabbed my hand, pulling me up. "C'mon," she said, dragging me up the stairs.

When we got into her room, she kissed me and pushed me into the bathroom, knowing I needed a shower, for I still had flour on me.

"I'll be right in here," she said, and closed the door.

I rushed through my shower and stepped out into the steamy bathroom.

Pulling on a pair of navy blue boxers, I opened the bathroom door, and immediately had a slight problem.

Caitlin was sitting on her desk in that blue leopard print bra with the black lace trim, and now she was wearing matching panties. I swallowed. Oh God.

She turned, noticing I was there, her long hair flowing around her shoulders as she swung her slender legs into the air.

I was immediately in between her legs, my arms on top of the desk, pressing her against the wall. I pressed my forehead to hers.

"Are you trying to kill me?"

She pressed her nose to mine.

"Possibly," she whispered, and pressed her lips to mine.

The kiss lasted for a maximum of five seconds, and she pulled away, breathing heavily from the sheer force of passion packed into it. She ran her finger down my cheek and pressed her lips back to my own, and almost immediately parted her lips. I slipped my tongue in between them, and she moaned quietly, only causing me to press my lips closer to her own as I melded her body to my own.

Our tongues battled for at least a minute, and then we parted because of the lack of oxygen traveling to our lungs.

I pressed my lips to her neck and she gasped, craning her neck back and giving me further access. Sucking on her pulse point, I trailed my fingers up and down her sides as she did the same to me. I kissed up and down her neck, finally resting on her collarbone to nip, causing her to make a noise I enjoyed very much.

I made my way back up to her lips, and she firmly secured them to mine, and wrapped her legs around my waist. I felt her slip two fingers into the waistband of my boxers, and I slid my hands up her back and undid the clasp on her bra and slipped the straps down her arms. She quickly shook them off and tossed it across the room.

I brought my lips to her chest, which was begging for some much-needed attention, and she cried out. "God, you're such a.. tease," she gasped out.

I kissed her neck and mumbled, "And you don't really give a fuck."

"I will if you don't give me a fuck," she growled, yanking on my boxers.

I responded by hooking my fingers into her panties and yanking them down, throwing them across the room.

She finally gave up and pushed my boxers down with her feet, which made me chuckle.

Caitlin wrapped her legs around my waist, and I leaned into her, both of us crying out.

_ _ _

When our breathing finally slowed down, Caitlin lay across my chest, her hand on my side, legs intertwined with my own. I ran a hand through her sweaty hair, and I felt her lips press to my warm skin.

"I love you," she breathed, kissing my chest again.

"I love you too," I said, continuing to run my fingers through her hair.

"Good God, that was fun," she laughed, shaking the bed.

"That's gotta be the first time I've ever had sex on a desk, or against a wall." We both started laughing.

"Me too." She sighed happily, and not soon thereafter, she fell asleep, her breathing becoming slow and deep.

A few minutes later, I fell asleep too.

* * *

A few weeks after I'd gotten out of the hospital, I was back in school, and had signed up for the talent show for some un-Godly reason that I still didn't know, which happened to be tonight. Aaron thought it'd be good for me to finally get into the "social circle of things" which confused the hell out of me, considering he had dropped off the football team, for a reason he wouldn't tell me. I guessed that the "guys" had really pissed him off about dating the "emo chick" as I'm most likely referred to. "Evans the Emo," as I was often referred to as.

I shuffled to my locker and began to beat on it — the only way to get the fucking thing open — when Aaron walked up.

"What are you doing?" he laughed, leaning on the locker next to mine.

"Opening—" smack "—my—" smack "—locker!" I huffed angrily and kicked it. It flew open and hit me in the face, and Aaron's laughter filled my ears. His voice then was directly in my ear.

"Babe, there's a dial on the locker for a reason." I shivered, and turned to face him, our lips nearly touching.

"It doesn't work."

"I can make it work."

"Sure you can, Mr. Magic," I murmured, my eyes flicking to his lips.

"Oh, I can. By the way.." His eyes flickered to my lips. "Is your head okay?"

"No more messed up than usual."

I suddenly became aware of nearly everyone staring at us, and had the dying urge to kiss him and prove that he's mine.

That urge was shattered when he slammed my locker shut.

I glared and he grinned. "Now I've gotta beat it to death again!"

"No, you don't," he said, twisting the lock around. It popped open.

"How do you know my combination?"

He leaned in and whispered in my ear. "I'm magical."

I laughed and tapped his nose. "Yes. Yes you are." He grinned.

"C'mon. Math is waiting." I groaned.

I hated Algebra. Mrs. Hockenberry was alright, though.

"Oh, come on. You can actually do math," Aaron said, holding my books while I fished around for my math binder.

I heaved an exasperated sigh. "Who's the one who skipped a grade?"

"Me. But you can still do math."

"Not as good as you." He grinned.

"That my be so, but you're still smart."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah."

I slammed my locker and we trudged off to math class, bringing me even closer to the damned Talent Show.

* * *

"Aaron, I don't know what the fuck I should wear!" I shouted in a burst of frustration, throwing another shirt across the room and hitting him in the face with it. He was distracted because I wasn't wearing anything except a bra and panties. "AARON! FOCUS!"

"GAH wha?" he said, jumping. He had been staring at my ass, which had been in the air as I searched around on the bottom of my floor.

"Help me!" I threw my hands up in the air in exasperation.

He sighed and got off his lazy ass. "What color do you wanna wear?"

"Black, obviously," I said, gesturing to my almost all black wardrobe.

He rolled his eyes and pulled out a few dresses.

One was simple and had a V-neck, the second one was shorter, and had blue beads across the top, and the third one looked like a prom dress that had never been used. Aaron raised his eyebrow at it.

"I got asked to prom once and then they dropped me." I glared at the wall.

"Well, if they'd seen you in this, they wouldn't have," he said, sounding surprised that someone had dropped me for prom. "Try it on."

"Why?"

"Cos it's gorgeous, and so are you. It's a perfect match." I growled, but grabbed the dress anyway, stalking to the bathroom.

I didn't bother to look in the mirror, and opened the door. Aaron dropped whatever it was that he was holding.

"Damn," he whispered.

I turned around in a circle slowly. "Do I look okay?"

"You look more than okay," he said, standing up. He ushered me into the bathroom to look at the floor length mirror on the back of the door. My eyes widened.

The dress was knee length, and had a wide pink ribbon across the middle, just under my boobs, which happened to look about a DDD, instead of their usual DD, and it was covered in sparkles.

"Wow," I said, turning and placing a hand on my hip.

"Wow is right." Aaron smiled. "So, what shoes are you gonna wear?" I laughed.

"Let me do my hair first."

"Oh, God."

* * *

Before going down stairs—Aaron had gotten tired of waiting—I looked in the mirror once more.

My hair was straight and had been teased, and I had sidebangs half-way over my left eye, with a sparkly pink headband nestled on top of my head. I had a black bow choker around my neck, and my shoes were three-inch heels with laces tying up under my dress. All in all, I looked pretty. Yes, I said I was pretty. You're not hearing things.

I made my way down the stairs, and once again, Aaron dropped whatever it was he was holding. This time I think it was the remote.

"You like?" I asked, spinning around and smiling.

"Oh, definitely." I laughed and grabbed my coat. "Come on."

In the car, Aaron asked me what song I was going to sing.

"A song," I said, playing with the bottom of my dress.

He sighed, figuring he wasn't going to find out until I started singing.

When we got into the school, Mrs. H, who was running the talent show, told me I looked "absolutely lovely." I rolled my eyes, and Aaron yanked me away from her before I could manage to get myself in trouble for having an attitude. I went with him because I enjoyed the feeling of his hand around mine too much.

Aaron and I sat backstage, waiting for my turn. I was extremely nervous.

Aaron ran his thumb over the back of my hand. "You'll do fine," he said, and kissed me softly.

"I hope so," I mumbled, tapping my foot to the beat of the song that was playing on the stage.

When it ended, Aaron kissed me again and made his way out to the front row.

"Next up, we have Caitlin Evans, playing the piano and singing A Thousand Miles by Vanessa Carlton!" Applause filled my ears, and I stepped onto the stage.

I sat down at the piano, and started playing. The band behind me followed not soon thereafter.

"Makin' my way downtown, walking fast, faces passing. I'm homebound. Staring blankly ahead, just making my way, making my way through the crowd. And I need you, and I miss you. And now I wonder.. If I could fall into the sky, do you think time would pass me by? Cos you know I'd walk a thousand miles if I could just see you.. tonight." I took a deep breath before continuing. "It's always times like these when I think of you, and I wonder if you ever think of me. Cos everything's so wrong, and I don't belong living in your precious memories. Cos I need you, and I miss you. And now I wonder.. If I could fall into the sky, do you think time would pass me by? Cos you know I'd walk a thousand miles if I could just see you.. tonight."

The whole crowd was bobbing their heads along with me, and I felt completely euphoric.

"And I, I, don't wanna let you know I, I, drown in your memory. I, I, don't wanna let this go. I, I, don't.. Making my way downtown, walking fast, faces passing. I'm homebound. Staring blankly ahead, just making my way, making my way through the crowd. And I still need you, and I still miss you. And now I wonder.." I stole a glance at Aaron's face, and saw that he was smiling at me. I smiled back. "If I could fall.. into the sky.. do you think time.. would pass.. us.. by? Cos you know I'd walk a thousand miles if I could just see you.. Oh, if I could fall into the sky, do you think time would pass me by? Cos you know I'd walk a thousand miles if I could just see you.. If I could just hold you.. Toni-i-ight."

I stood up as cheers and applause exploded. I couldn't believe it. The girl that no one likes was getting the most applause.

I could feel happy-tears running down my face, and ruining my makeup. I smiled and made my way off the stage.

When I got back there, Aaron was already waiting, and he engulfed me in the warmest hug I've ever felt. I could feel his lips touch the top of my head. "You did amazing, babe," he whispered into my hair.

"Really?"

"Of course. Would I lie?" I laughed.

"Possibly. You did lie about the olives.." I could hear the growl in his chest and I laughed even harder.

"Stupid vegetable."

"Oh, come on," I said, grabbing his hand and pulling him out to the audience.

When he sat down, I crawled on his lap and watched the rest of the performances. Aaron played with my fingers, and I rested my head back against his shoulder.

I sat up stock-still on Aaron's lap when they said they would announce the winners.

"Our third place winner, with the bronze trophy and a $15 gift certificate is.. Gala Avary!" exclaimed Mrs. Hockenberry. Gala came sprinting up the stairs that led to the stage and all but attacked the trophy. She'd sung RESPECT by Aretha Franklin, and very well. I clapped along with the rest of the crowd, tense as hell.

"Our second place winner, with the silver trophy and a $20 gift certificate is.. Emma Bransen!" A very loud shriek came from somewhere in the audience, and then a blur of blonde and black flew by. My eyes widened. Emma had done Never Say Never by The Fray. I clapped once more, even tenser than I was the first time. Aaron wrapped his arms around my waist.

"You'll win," he whispered in my ear, and I felt myself un-tense, and I sighed.

"And our first place winner, with the gold trophy and a $50 gift certificate is.." Mrs. Hockenberry paused, drawing out the suspense.

"JUST SAY IT ALREADY!" I shouted.

Thank God she couldn't identify who'd screamed it, because I would've gotten a detention or some stupid-ass thing like that.

"Caitlin Evans!"

This time, I screamed and flew up the stairs to the stage, tripping twice. I grabbed the trophy from Mrs. H's hands and hugged her for some unknown reason. It was probably just because I was extremely elated. I don't go around hugging Algebra teachers on a daily basis. Unless I'm high. Or drunk. Or something.

* * *

On the way home, Aaron and I blasted I Gotta Feeling by the Black Eyed Peas.

I turned to him. "I gotta feeling, wooohoo, that tonight's gonna be a good night! That tonight's gonna be a good night! That tonight's gonna be a good, good night!"

The music was so loud the car was shaking.

"Tonight's the night, night! Let's live it up! I got my money; Let's spend it up! Go out and smash it! Like "OH MY GOD!" Jump off that sofa! Let's get, get off!" Aaron and I shouted. I was also shaking the car with my sporadic dancing.

"I know that we'll have a ball, if we get down, and go out, and just loose it all! I feel stressed out. I wanna let it go! Let's go way out, spaced out, and loosing all control!"

Aaron and I started laughing at our sheer stupidity.

When we reached home, we were still really hyped up, and you can just imagine what happened.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen**

About a week-and-a-half after I won, I was lying in bed next to Aaron, and staring at the ceiling in the pitch black. The LED light alarm clock numbers floated in the dark, as if suspended by some unknown force in the room. It was quite eerie.

Aaron was in a deep sleep; snoring up the room. Okay, not really snoring. More like light.. snore-ish noises.

I sighed and got out of bed, slipping my baggy white sweatshirt that was on the floor over my bra and panties. It said IGNORANCE on the front, and IS YOUR NEW BEST FRIEND on the back. Woo. Go Paramore.

I slid my feet into my slippers and grabbed my iPod, shuffling out of the room and closing my—our—bedroom door, and made my way to the very end of our hall, going into the spare bedroom. I reached above the door frame and pulled down the old black skeleton key, and unlocked the door to the attic, and closed the door behind me. I became engulfed in the darkness. Feeling around for the rail, I made my way up the wooden steps and into the large attic.

I crossed the floor, side-stepping random items, and pushed open the largest window. I inhaled the midnight air, and climbed out onto the flat roof.

Sitting down against the side of the house, I plugged my headphones into my iPod and hung them around my neck.

It started in the middle of a song, and I began to sing along as I tilted my head up, and looked around for the North Star.

"The rumors flew, but nobody knew how much she blamed herself for years and years. She tried to hide the whiskey on her breath. She finally drank her pain away a little at a time, but she never could get drunk enough to get him off her mind, until the night.. She put the bottle to her head and pulled the trigger, and finally drank away his memory. Life is short but this time it was bigger than the strength she had to get up off her knees. We found her with her face down in the pillow, clingin' to his picture for dear life. We laid her next to him beneath the willow, while the angels sang a whiskey lullaby. La la la la la la la. La la la la la la la."

I rested my chin on my knees and wrapped my arms around myself while my body wracked with silent sobs. I didn't know why I was crying, but it felt good to get it out.

"This heart, it beats, beats for only you! My heart, my heart is yours," rang out into the silence from my headphones. This only made me cry harder.

I don't know how long I was on the roof, or how long I sobbed myself to death. It could have been minutes, hours, or years. I'm not sure. I just know that my sight was so blurry that the stars looked like little blobs of light.. Maybe like fairies..

I laughed at that thought, but the sound of the laugh wasn't pleasant.

I wiped my eyes and made my way back to the window, and crawled inside, latching the window tight.

Stepping over the random odds and ends once more, I made my way over to the stairs and traipsed down them, opening the attic door at the bottom. I closed it and locked it, replacing the key at the top of the frame.

When I got back into our room, Aaron was sitting up in bed. "Where were you?" he asked, his voice laced with worry.

"I—" I sniffed and wiped my eyes again.

'What's wrong?" He was up and out of bed in record time, coming to a stop right in front of me.

"Nothing," I muttered, wiping my eyes continually.

Aaron put one hand on my shoulder, and the other on my cheek. "Why are you crying?"

"I'm fine," I whispered, sniffling. His large thumb wiped away a tear that I missed.

"No, you're not," he said, pulling me to his chest and wrapping his arms around me. I returned the gesture, burying my face into his white t-shirt, and heaved a sob. "Am I ever?" I asked quietly. I felt his hand go through my hair.

"Not really, but I love you anyway, babe. Now, will you tell me what's wrong?" He sounded worried. That made me feel even worse. I hate making him worry. That's all I seem to do nowadays.

I removed my face from his shirt and looked at him, searching his eyes for any sign of what was running through that mind of his. It was too dark to see anything except the shine of his golden brown eyes reflecting the light that was beginning to filter in through the windows.

Had I really been gone that long?

"I - I don't .. really know," I whispred. "I just decided to o outside, and I wound up crying." I decided against telling him about the attic. I'm not sure why; maybe in case.. No. Don't venture there. I could see him finding me sooner or later, spacing out at the stars.

"Is there any particular reason why?" His thumb brushed away another tear.

"No. I just needed a cry, I guess."

"Are you okay now?" I smiled a watery smile and nodded, standing on my tippy-toes and pressing my lips to his.

The kiss was slow, sensual. It filled me with the love he had for me through every crack and crevice inside and outside of me. It felt absolutely amazing.

When we separated for the much needed oxygen that filtered to our brains, I sighed happily.

We made our way back into the bed, and I curled up next to him, half on and half off of his chest. My head rose and fell with each breath that filled his lungs, and it was a consoling movement.

Aaron began to mindlessly play with my long brown curls - which I loathed with a fiery passion from hell - and trailed the other finger down my arm and back up it. "You're so pretty," he mumbled. I wasn't even sure I had heard it. I decided to respond anyway while I drew meaningless patterns on the lower part of his stomach.

"Not really."

"Aaron, you're blind." I drew circles and zig-zags, my finger leaving little dips in his shirt wherever it went.

"No, you're the blind one." His finger twirled around in my hair, and then I felt a curl boing as he pulled his finger away.

"No I'm not.I see myself clearly." I closed my eyes.

"Then what do you see?" I could hear his voice reverbrate through his chest.

"I see a short girl, who isn't skinny enough. I see a girl who needs a completely new face. I see a girl who is just one big flaw." Aaron didn't say anything for a moment; he just played with my hair some more.

"What you see is wrong. All wrong," he finally said, breaking the silence. "Yeah, you're short, but it makes you even cuter when you have to stand on your tip-toes to kiss me. You don't need to lose any weight. None at all. I love your body." He trailed a finger along my jawline. "And you're.. absolutely.." He seemed to be searching for a word. "You're the most beautiful and prettiest girl in the whole world, Caitlin."

Immediately, I felt tears spring to my eyes. "Really?" I asked quietly, stopping the drawing I was doing on his stomach.

"Of course. I wouldn't lie to you about something like that." He quickly caught what he had said. "I wouldn't ever lie to you."

"I try not to," I said, resuming my doodling.

We were silent for a while, and I started to doze off.

"Caitlin?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

I smiled. "I love you too, Aaron."

Not soon after, I fell asleep, lulled by the light movement of Aaron's chest, and his words floating through my head.

* * *

When I woke up, the sun was gone, and the sound of rain pitter-pattered against my window. I was alone, with my face down in the pillow. "Aaron?" No answer.

Sitting up, I stretched. I realized I was still in pretty much just a hoodie, but I decided that I didn't give a damn. I got up and slowly made my way downstairs, all the while wiping sleep from my eyes and clutching to the side-rail for dear life.

Aaron was in the kitchen again. Oh no. Last time he was in there alone, we had olives on the ceiling.

I stopped with my hand on the kitchen door when I heard voices coming from the other side. Who could be here?

"I'm pregnant, Aaron," A voice said. A voice I didn't recognize. My heart spasmed and I sucked in a breath.

"Are you sure?" he asked quietly.

"Yeah. I'm positive. Pardon the pun." He chuckled darkly. "I'm scared, Aaron."

"I know you are." I could hear a chair scoot across the floor. "It's okay to be scared."

"I just don't want them to kick me out or anything.. Then they'll be alone with them.."

"Jessi," Aaron started, and I released the breath I was holding. He continued," If they kick you out, you can come live with me and Caitlin."

"Speaking of her, how's she doing? Last you told me, she'd just gotten out of the hospital."

"She's doing great." He sighed. "But I'm still worried." My heart clenched.

"Why?"

"Last night, I woke up, and she wasn't in the bed. I could hear noises.. that sounded like they were coming from outside. It sounded like someone was crying." He heard me? Who else had heard me? "She finally came back into the room.. and she was crying. I don't think she cut herself or anything.. I mean, she was wearing white.. I would have seen it, right?"

"Probably," Jessi said. "But she loves you, Aaron. She wouldn't do something like that again."

"I hope so."

There was a moment of silence, and I decided to make my entrance then.

Pushing open the door, I tripped on Lord knows what, and went sprawling onto the floor. I heard Aaron try and stifle a laugh, and Jessi gasp. I lifted my right arm and waved somewhat.

"Hi, Jessi."

"Are you alright?" she asked, coming to help me.

I pried my face off the linoleum, and I met Jessi's worried eyes. "I'm fine, I'm fine! This is the usual way I enter the kitchen. Any other way would probably signal the Apocalypse." I laughed. Aaron rolled his eyes. I glared at him.

He sighed. "Are you okay?" he asked, still snickering.

I picked up a shoe off the floor and threw it at his head, and smiled sweetly. "Now I am."

Jessi just looked back and forth from me to Aaron, like it was a tennis match. "You two.. are really weird."

I sat up and dusted myself off. "Yeah, we know and embrace it." I pulled myself up and went to sit on Aaron's lap. "So, how're you this.." I surveyed the light through the windows. "This muggy afternoon?" She laughed, and I smiled.

"I'm doing great. I just found out I'm about three months pregnant, though."

"You happy about that?" I rested my head against Aaron's shoulder and played with his fingers.

"I'm elated." She smiled, and her eyes glistened.

Jessi didn't look as Mexican as Aaron did, although I say they look nearly alike. She had blonde hair and blue-ish eyes. She seemed to be maybe 5'6 or 5'7, and she was really pretty.

"I love babies," I told her, wrapping my legs around one of Aaron's. "Although I don't think I'm getting one any time soon."

"You got that right," Aaron said, resting his chin on my shoulder. "I don't mind them, but I honestly don't think we need another person in the house for a while, you know?"

"I never said we needed one now."

"You two are really .. You sound like an old married couple."

"Old?" I squeaked. "We aren't old!"

"I may not be, but you are," Aaron said, laughing at my outburst.

"WHO'S THE SEVENTEEN YEAR OLD, AND WHO'S THE SIXTEEN YEAR OLD, EH?!" I yelled, smacking him upside the head.

He sighed. "You're the sixteen year old, I'm the seventeen year old. Yeah, yeah, yeah, we got it."

Jessi just stared at us.

I started giggling and Aaron rolled his eyes again. "Ignore her," he said to Jessi, putting a hand over my mouth. I licked his hand. He ignored me. "It's how i deal with her."

"You're so mean," she said, laughing. Checking her watch, she jumped up, nearly knocking over the chair she was sitting in. "I have to get to work! I forgot!"

"You must be where I get the forgetfullness from, Jessi," Aaron said, releasing my mouth.

"Nah. You're just dumb," I said, patting him on the head.

"Once again, you're mean, Aaron," she laughed, and leaned in, kissing his cheek, and then kissing mine. Next thing I knew, she was gone. I turned to look at Aaron.

"She looks exactly like you."

"No she does not."

"Yes she does."

"Doesn't."

"Does."

"Doesn't."

"Doesn't."

"Does."

"HAHA!"

"HEY! You used that stupid reverse psychology on me. Again," Aaron said, flicking me in the head.

"If it's so stupid, why'd it work?" I grinned, moving to sit across from him.

".." He narrowed his eyes.

"No, we don't."

"Yeah, you do. If we shaved her head, or gave you a blonde wig, you two would be twins!"

"Excuse me?"

"What?" I blinked.

"BLONDE WIG?"

"You'd look sexy."

"I give up!" he shouted, stalking into the living room. I burst into hysterics at Aaron's outburst, and followed him into the living room after regaining my composure. He was flipping through the TV channels mindlessly, so I moved in front of the TV.

"You make a better door than you do a window," he said, continuing to press the channel up button.

I moved closer to him and he looked up at me with those gorgeous brown eyes.

"..Whatcha doin'?" he asked, reaching around me to mute the TV.

"Doesn't look like nothing," he muttered, pulling me onto his lap. I smirked and kissed him, giggling slightly. "You're so strange," he mumbled against my lips.

"You like it," I replied, pushing closer to him and putting my hands on his waist, digging my fingers into his hips.

"That may be so.." He couldn't reply any further, for I had rendered him incapable of speech.

* * *

I picked up Aaron's hand and turned it over, tracing the lines in his palm with my fingers that looked like a child's compared to his own.

"Why do you find my hands so fascinating?" he asked. I could feel his bare chest vibrate against my naked back.

"I dunno.. They just are." I rested my head back on his chest and looked up at him. He looked kind of odd upside-down. "I like big fingers," I whispered, and giggled when his eyes widened.

"So you're only dating me for my hands, eh?"

"Oh, definitely. That, and the rest of your probing extremities." He tickled my sides and I laughed.

"I'm only dating for your laugh."

"Of course! My only redeeming quality!"

"Yeah, other than your everything else," he mumbled into my neck.

"Baah," I said, closing my eyes and tilting my head back as far as I could.

"You're gorgeous. Stop denying it."

"You win.. for now."

I could feel the smirk cross his lips, seeing as they were pressed against my neck.

During a moment of silence while Aaron pressed light, tender kisses to my neck, I began to doze off.

"Caitlin?" he said quietly between kisses.

"Mmmm?"

"I love you."

"I love you too, Aaron."

* * *

"Hey Aaaaronnn?" I called, drawing his name out.

"Yessss?" he replied, sticking his head into the kitchen where I was playing with my laptop.

"I have an idea of what we can do today."

"Oh, no," he said with a smirk on his face. "You've been thinking."

I crossed my eyes and stuck out my tongue. "Bite me."

"That can be arranged." He smirked evilly, and I had a flashback of him biting my ass on the stairs. "Anyhow, what's your idea?" I blinked.

"Right.. Sorry; spacing out." I shook my head, and again, he laughed at me. "I thought that today, since it's a teacher in-service day, that we could take a bunch of pictures in random places." Aaron acted like he was pondering that fact.

"Pictures of..?" He tilted his head to the side and I giggled.

"Of us, silly!"

"Hmm.. maybe the school?" His eyes widened.

"But we hate that place."

"Maybe, yes, but the front of the school with all the stairs - which I have fallen down a few times - and the ramps and the rails makes for good pictures.."

"Okay, okay, I get it!" he laughed.

"YAY! I need to get dressed." I flew past Aaron and up to our room.

"What's wrong with what you're wearing now?!" I was in a skimpy tanktop and shorts.

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME?" I shouted, digging around for my white and purple layered tanktops. "Maybe for working on a street corner, yeah, but not going outside and taking pictures!"

"On a street corner?" Aaron asked from behind me, and I jumped. I then ignored him, looking for some of my old flare jeans.

I pulled out four pairs that were absolutely riddled with holes. I turned to aaron, who had been gazing off in the direction of my booty-short-clad butt. "Which pair?"

"Try them on?" I rolled my eyes and tried on each pair. He finally chose a light blue pair that had holes in the knees and in the butt, with bleach spots all over, curtosey of myself.

"Hair up or down?"

"Down." I could see him behind me in the mirror.

"Curly or straight?" I pawed through my evil hair.

I felt a curl on the back of my head boing, and Aaron whispered in my ear, "I like it curly," and I shivered.

After quickly applying make-up, I turned to Aaron and slowly turned in a full circle. "So? You liiiiike?"

His eyes trailed my every movement, taking in everything from my eyebrow ring to following the chain that led down into my shirt with his eyes.

"You should dress like this more often." I beamed. "You look amazing." He smiled lightly, and I blushed and thanked him.

While trying to tie my purple converse, I asked Aaron to go get the camera out of the kitchen.

I could hear him leave, and clomp down the stairs.. and then I heard a loud clatter and Aaron swear. I'm assuming he accidentally opened the cupboard that we had shoved all of the pots and pans into.

I ran down the stairs and found Aaron trying to cram the pots back into the cupboard.

"Having issues?"

"GAH!" All the pans came back out and crashed into an even worse mess than before at his feet.

"Honey," I laughed, pulling out the camera, "give it up."

"Stupid fucking stuff!"

I snapped a picture, and he glared.

"You love me," I countered, smiling sweetly.

"Beh."

I grabbed his arm. "Come on!"


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen**

"Do you know how to use my camera?"

"Yes.." he said, pulling up to the nearly-empty parking lot.

"Let's hope so," I said, patting his thigh and then hopping out of the car. I raced over to the blue railings that went around the barren flower (or what was supposed to be flower) beds. I climbed onto the railing and balanced myself. Aaron took the camera from me and backed away several feet, moving the camera around, supposedly looking for a "good view." There was no good view of me.

I re-balanced myself and turned away from the camera as a large gust of wind came, ruffling my hair as I tried to push it back behind my ear. I heard the camera click.

"How does it look?" I asked as the breeze died down.

"Great!" Aaron called back.

"Whoa!" I shouted as a piece of mulch hit me in the forehead, and I toppled backwards into the flower bed, my legs still up over the rail.

"And the wood chip hits the mark, knocking the target off the railing and into what is supposed to be a garden of some sort," Aaron said, walking slowly over to me.

He leaned over the rail, and in between my legs (which were spread eagle, mind you. I looked like I was in a sex position!) and panned the camera in on my face (and chest). Men.

"Aaron, I'm going to give you a vasectomy," I growled, propping up onto my elbows. "WITH AN AXE." He gulped, but continued filming as I fought to get down (completely) from the railing.

"Even when pissed, you're cute." I just glared, and pulled myself up. Aaron shoved the camera into my face again, and I stuck out my tongue, and pressed the stop button. "You're mean."

I licked the top of his nose and he just stared, bewildered, at me.

"There is something wrong with you. Really." I grinned and nodded, grabbing the camera in the process.

"Smile!" I said, and raised the camera. Aaron beamed, and I snapped a picture. "Aww, you're so cute!"

He frowned. "Cute?"

I rolled my eyes. "You look hot, okay?"

"That's better."

"Let's take some more pictures!" I squealed, pulling him to the stairs. He just groaned and followed suit. Like he had a choice? Ha!

* * *

"Did you have fun, Aaron?" I asked, smiling.

We were on our way home from the bridge; our last stop of the evening for pictures before sunset.

"Yeah," he said, taking my hand. I smiled at him, and then with my free hand, I flipped through the pictures on my camera, favoriting several pictures. A few of them were:

At the high school, where I was on Aaron's lap, and we were both smiling into the camera,

In St. Morrison Park, I was hanging upside-down off the monkey-bars, and Aaron was kissing me (think of the Spiderman upside-down kissing scene),

A random picture of me running away from Aaron and laughing,

and my favorite one was Aaron and I at the bridge, with the beginning of the sunset behind us, sharing a kiss.

"Good," I replied, turning off the camera.

"Do the pictures all look okay?" Aaron turned onto our street.

"Yeah. You're photogenic." I laughed.

"Then what does that make you?" He parked the car, and turned it off.

"The photogenic boy's girlfriend?" He tapped my nose and got out of the car.

The sun was finally starting to set, and the whole sky was aflame with crimson and fuchsia streaks.

When we finally got into the house, I pulled Aaron over to the couch. "Come on. One last picture for today."

"Oh, fine."

I sat on his right side, and put my head on his shoulder. I could feel his head come to rest atop my own. "Smile," I said, raising the camera. I smiled, and I sure hoped he had, too, and I snapped the picture.

When I turned the camera to look at the picture, my mouth dropped open. The picture was amazing.

Aaron leaned over my shoulder. "Wow. That's a good picture." I turned to him and kissed his lips.

"Of course it is. You're in it."

"But it's better because you're in it, you know," he muttered, kissing me again.

"If you say so," I mumbled against his lips.

"I do say so." Aaron kissed my neck, and I squeaked. "You know, you make the cutest—" kiss "—little—" kiss "—noises—" kiss "—ever, right?"

I was having a hard time forming coherent and complete thoughts. "Yeah, sure, whatever you say."

He chuckled and continued kissing my neck.

Little did I know that that was the last time that would be happening for a long while.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Sixteen**

Caitlin had stayed home with a migraine today, so I was in for a pretty boring day.

So far, I had sat mindlessly through four periods. Lunch was where I was headed, and I was almost thankful for it.

Almost immediately after I had sat down with some type of sandwich, Luke Conroy and Steven Kelley pulled out a chair and sat across from me. I looked up in surprise. Neither Luke nor Steven had done much speaking to me since I dropped off the football team.

"Hi," I said, eyeing them warily.

Luke answered. "Yo."

"Hi," I repeated, taking a drink of my soda.

"Sup?" Luke asked.

"Nothing much. You?"

"Nothin'. So.. Where's Evans?" He eyed the empty chair next to me. Steven was actually sitting in her seat, but anyhow..

"Home with a migraine."

"That's too bad." _Doesn't sound like you feel sad about it._

I nodded.

"So.. Steven and I were wondering if you wanted to hang out at my place for a while after school, and play San Andreas or somethin'," Luke asked. "MY parents aren't home until 6:30."

"I dunno." Caitlin was sick.

"C'mon man. All you do is spend time with that chick."

"That _chick_ is my girlfriend, thanks."

"Yeah, we know," Steven said.

"But you need to do something else." Luke leaned in. "C'mon. I found out where my dad hides the beer."

"Fine." It couldn't hurt, could it?

"You gonna come right on over, or do you needa do somethin' first?"

"Nah. I'll just come over after school."

* * *

It was now six. Aaron had said he'd be home around five.

Doing something like this to someone like me.. probably wasn't in Aaron's best interests.

I had probably already worn a path in the carpet by pacing back and forth at least forty thousand times in ten minutes.

I jumped when the front door opened and Aaron clamoured in.

I immediately wrapped my arms around him. He smelled faintly of beer and.. I looked at his brown eyes. Dilated pupils.. he smelled faintly of Marijuana. I knew the smell — Smoky, sweet, and kinda peppery. I'd done several pounds of hashish myself.

I decided not to say anything about the fact that he was high, and instead asked, "Where were you?"

He closed the door and took off his jacket. "I lost track of time. I'm sorry." He kissed my cheek. "Do we have anything to eat? I'm starving." I blinked.

"Um, yeah." I followed him into the kitchen. "What do you want?"

"Do we have any chips or something?"

I pulled out a bag of BBQ chips, of which he took from my hands and then kissed my cheek again.

"Thanks, babe," he said, and then went into the living room.

"Wel.. come?" I exhaled, hoping this was a one time drug-use. Oh, how wrong I was.

It was only the beginning.

* * *

For the past two weeks, Aaron has come home around at least 6 - 7 PM, when school gets out at 3:15.

I've gotten a job at the local to help with the growing loneliness, and to help pay the bills.

I was currently at work. It was at least 8 PM. I got off in 15 minutes or so.

The person I had been currently thinking about showed up at the counter with a large Sprite and a bag of Cheetos.

"Oh, you're working tonight?" Aaron asked as I rang him up.

"Yeah," I said. "That'll be $5.47."

He handed me $6.

"What time do you get off?" he asked as I handed him 13¢ back.

"8:15. You wanna just wait here until I get off?" He surprised me when he said sure, and took a seat at one of the small booths by the windows, and opened his bag of Cheetos.

I didn't know what he was high on this time - he didn't really smell like pot or anything. I honestly wanted it to stop soon. I missed Aaron.

Already, I had considered calling Jessi to find out if he'd had any drug problems before. And, if he had, it wouldn't surprise me in a way. I seemed to always go for the druggies without knowing it.

When I got off work, Aaron and I trudged to the car. Yes, the car. I have to skateboard to work, for Aaron has the car to go to Luke's, Steven's, or whoever's house he's at getting high as a kite.

"Pretty good," Aaron replied. "What about you?" Oh, I bet it was pretty good.

"Pretty interesting at some points." He made a noise, as if to say, "Carry on." I looked out the window. "Some forty-year-old looked at me as if he were undressing me with his eyes, and a thirteen-year-old commented on my "nice rack."

He was silent. I couldn't tell if it bothered him or not.

The rest of the ride was quiet. Too quiet.

When we pulled into the driveway, Aaron turned off the car and turned to me. He opened his mouth as if to say something, and then decided against it. He got out of the car. I sighed and followed suit.

As Aaron made his way into the living room, I picked up the phone and found Jessi's number. I took off up the stairs and waited until I got unto the attic to actually call her.

She picked up on the fourth ring.

"Hello?"

"Um, Jessi? It's Caitlin, Aaron's girlfriend?"

"Oh! Hi! How are you?"

"I could be better. You?" I pushed open the window and sat down, pulling my knees up so I could rest my chin atop them.

"Pretty good. I'm amazed at how much bigger I am within about three weeks."

"Yeah.." I swallowed. "Listen, I've got a question about Aaron." I bit my lip, unsure on how to go about asking Jessi if her brother had ever had any experience with drugs that she had ever known about.

"Yeah?"

"Has Aaron ever.. like, been into drugs before, that you know of?" There was a silence on the other side of the line, and then Jessi cursed quietly.

"Not that I know of, really. I think when he was thirteen or fourteen, he got a little into Marijuana, but that's about it.. Why do you ask?"

"Oh, no reason," I said a little too quickly. "I was just.. wondering." I closed my eyes tight, hoping she wouldn't ask me the question that she (of course) asked me next.

"..Is he using drugs?" Her voice sounded concerned.

"I—" I froze. Should I lie? No, Aaron's her brother. She deserves to know, right? "It's just maybe a little pot here and there, I think." Okay.. so.. that wasn't a total lie. There was (more than) a little pot here and there, buts he didn't need to worry more than she probably was going to.

Jessi was silent again. "Is that all he's doing?" she asked, as if she knew I wasn't telling her the whole truth.. and maybe that she knew more than I did about the whole "maybe just a little pot" thing.

I felt bad about lying to her.. But I had to. "Yeah.. I was just wondering, is all."

"Alright then."

"Caitlin?" Aaron's voice called. "Where are you?"

"I've got to go. Aaron needs something." Probably more food or something.

"Okay. Bye."

"Bye, Jessi."

I made my way downstairs. Aaron was at the bottom.

"Oh, there you are." He smiled and kissed my cheek. I immediately wondered what he was on this time.

"Yeah. Here I am," I said, going into the kitchen to hang the phone back up. If Aaron noticed, he didn't say anything (surprisingly).

I nearly jumped out of my skin when Aaron wrapped his arms around me from behind and rested his chin on my shoulder.

"You're so pretty. Did you know that?"

I could feel tears trying to let loose. This was the first time in two or more weeks that he'd touched me or said anything that indicated that he wasn't just a random stranger living in my house.

"Did you?" he whispered in my ear.

"Nu-uh," I finally answered, willing myself to speak.

He chuckled. "Well, you are." He kissed my cheek and went back into the living room, while I made my way up the stairs, trying to hold back tears.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Seventeen**

I wiped my eyes and told myself that he was not becoming like my parents.

Sitting on the bed, I tried to think about the drugs that would make Aaron like he was downstairs. Happy. Uninhibited.

Probably not pot; he'd be too.. calm. More calm than he was. More.. "let's lay on the couch eating potato chips."

Opium is also more laid back. I would know.

Probably not crack or cocaine; he's been high for too long..

I settled on either something like Vicodin, or maybe GHB.

Wiping my eyes again and expelling a shaky breath, I went to the bathroom to go take a shower.

When I came back out, I had a bandage on my leg. I accidentally cut myself "shaving."

I lay down and plugged my iPod into my head.

Cos I'm so sick and tired of being sick and tired. Somebody turn the lights on, somebody tell me what's wrong. I'd be lying if I told you losing you was something I could handle. Somebody turn the lights on, somebody tell me how long. All this darkness will surround you, cos I'm burning for you, burning like a candle. This honestly reduced me to tears for no apparent reason that I could see.

I guess I finally fell asleep. I don't know when or if Aaron ever came to bed or not. I hoped that if he did, he felt bad about what he's doing to me. But, then again, he was probably higher than Cloud 9, and either didn't care, or didn't realize I was crying or why.

* * *

The next morning, Aaron was in the kitchen, swallowing some form of pill. An upper (amphetamine), probably.

He choked on his water when I walked in. This showed to me that he didn't know I knew about his drug usage.

"Morning," I said as he finished coughing. Did he think I was that stupid?

"Morning." He smiled.

"Did you ever come to bed last night?" I asked, deciding against eating something.

"Yeah," he said. "Around midnight, I guess."

I twitched. GHB was more likely than Vicodin. Vicodin seemed to wear off faster than GHB. God, what's next? Crack and cocaine? Meth? Heroin? Really?

"You going to Luke's, Steven's, or whoever's house you go to?" To get high as a kite.

"Uhm, yeah," he answered.

"Okay.. I may or may not be here when you come home." If you come home.

"Why? Where will you be?"

"Work. I get off at seven." I slung my backpack over my shoulder. "You ready?"

"Yeah." Aaron took my hand, and the first thought that ran through my head was that this felt strange. As I said earlier, Aaron hadn't really shown any acknowledgement that I was even his girlfriend lately.

When we got into the car, Aaron turned to me, and grabbed my hand again. "I'm sorry that I've been gone a lot these past two weeks," he told me. "If you hate me, I can completely understand.." It seemed as if he may tell me finally that he was on drugs, but instead he leaned in and kissed me lightly on the lips, and started the car.

Where his lips had been burned, like the first time he'd kissed me.

Half-way to the high school, I finally said, "I don't hate you. I never can."

He didn't say anything, and I silently willed the tears that were threatening to fall to go back into hiding.

We got out of the car in silence, and Aaron almost immediately wrapped an arm around me. I sighed, and leaned into the warmth that was Aaron.

We passed Luke Conroy on our way into the building, and I could see the look that passed between the two. I couldn't exactly read it. I wasn't sure if it was one of those, "What the hell are you doing?" - "Mind your own business." looks, or .. maybe one of those "We still on for tonight?" - "Yeah. Don't mind the chick on my arm." looks. I hoped it wasn't the latter.

Since Aaron still had my schedule, excluding sixth period, so we made our way to writing, and both sat in the back.

We were making brochures about ourselves. I found this an odd project to be starting in the middle of the year, but whatever. Currently, we had to pick five pictures of ourselves, our friends, us and our family, or some kind of picture with you in it to go inside of it.

"Aaron?"

He turned to look at me. His pencil eraser was in his mouth. He looked cute.

"Yeah?"

"What pictures do you think I should use?" I knew for a fact that I was going to use the one of us on the couch, and outside on the stairs.

"Oh," I dunno." He paused to think. "Maybe the one of you in the field? And maybe the one right before you fell off the railing?" He grinned.

"Good idea." I turned back to my paper and quickly wiped my eyes.

"Why are you crying?" he whispered, reaching over and touching my arm.

"I'm not," I whispered back. "My eyes are just watering. Allergies."

"No, they're not," he said. I nodded.

"Yes. They are."

I just sighed, and started writing, hoping that the clock would go faster.

* * *

Aaron came home with me for the first time in three weeks.

I lay down on the bed and closed my eyes. I felt Aaron brush my hair away from my face.

"Do you want me to stay home?"

"Really?" I whispered, sniffling. Don't you have to go smoke something?

"Yes, really." I could hear a tone of regret lacing into his words. I wasn't sure if it was regret for staying here and not leaving, or regret for what he's done to me lately.

"Please?"

He lay behind me, and pulled my back against his chest, and put one leg over part of mine, and then ran his fingers through my hair. The soothing motion eventually lulled me to sleep.

When I woke up, I couldn't see Aaron, but I could smell him. He was in the bathroom.

I creeped over to the door, and peeked through the crack. Sure enough, he was smoking a shard of glass. I flinched.

Meth fucked up lives. Bad.

I suddenly felt nauseous, but I knew I couldn't go into the bathroom.

I dashed over to my window, and wrenched it open, and heaved out into the yard.

I collapsed on the floor, trying to breathe fresh air.

"Caitlin?" I turned. Aaron was standing there. God, he smelled too sweet.. And he was all jumpy.

I heaved out the window again.

"Caitlin? What's wrong?" I felt him holding my hair back.

Coughing, I answered, "I don't know," when I full well knew what was wrong.

I understand doing drugs at a friend's house, but at ours?

I didn't know how much more of this I could take.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter Eighteen**

Two more weeks, and he's only been here for about six days out of those two. At all.

I knew that by now he was snorting.. Possibly injecting..

He'd had three nosebleeds out of the blue when he was home, and I'd seen the marks on his arm where it looked like he'd had blood drawn.

I'd also pretty much taken up cutting again. They were small and discreet, but they were there.

Currently, I was curled up on the couch, watching Intervention. I'd gotten really attached to it lately.

This one was about two kids who were addicted to Heroin. It was bothering me, but I couldn't come to change the channel.

When the door opened, I nearly flew out of my skin.

I turned, and there stood Aaron, looking like hell. Apparently it was raining, because he was wet. This was the first time he'd been home in five days.

I looked at him, long and hard, and then finally said, "Nice of you to show up."

"Yeah.. I'm sorry about that."

I narrowed my eyes. "If you were so sorry, you could have come home."

He sighed. "Yeah, I guess I could have."

"Yeah, you could have." I pinched the bridge of my nose. "How long will you be here this time? Two days? Three?"

"Caitlin, I don't want to fight with you," he said, kicking off his shoes.

"Then don't give me a reason to fight with you, Aaron," I whispered.

He sat a few feet from me on the couch. "I don't want to give you a reason to fight with me." He took a deep breath. "And that's why I'm going to tell you what I'm going to tell you. I don't want to fight with you anymore." He took my hand, and I blinked. Another foreign move. "I also hate hurting you, and I see that's what I'm doing." I could feel my eyes beginning to water. "And.. I doubt you'd think I would notice, with how I've been acting lately, but I know you've cut again, Caitlin."

I wiped my eyes. "Yeah, I have."

"Caitlin.." I looked at him. "I have something I need to tell you."

I swallowed. Was he finally going to tell me he was on drugs? "Yeah?"

He looked down. "I'm using drugs."

I let out the breath I didn't realize I was holding. "I know."

His head shot up. "You did?"

"Aaron.. You don't hide it as well as you think." I pushed a strand of hair behind my ear. "You know that day.. I threw up?"

"..Yeah?"

"It's cos I caught you smoking glass." He closed his eyes, and breathed in through his nose. "It scared me. Because.. smoking it at Luke's is one thing.. Smoking it here.. was another.. And I know how bad Meth fucks up lives."

"..Yeah," he said quietly.

"Aaron.. what drugs have you used.. in the month that this started?"

"..I—Do you want to know?" I flinched. It was that bad?

"..Yes. I want to know."

He sighed. "It started with Marijuana.. and then it went to Barbituates.. Mostly Valium.. And then I did Acid, and I did Opium a few times." He looked up at me, and then continued. "I did Amphetamines, like Ritalin and stuff. I did X.. And.. I did Cocaine.." My heart froze. "You know I did Meth.. I did Heroin. I snorted and injected it." I already knew that. I saw the marks. "I did GHB.. And through almost all of that, I was taking Vicodin."

I wiped my eyes. "What did you do when you were gone for so long?"

"I was drunk for .. four days or so. And high." I blinked, and pinched the bridge of my nose. "I'm sorry. Are you mad?"

"I'm not mad, Aaron. I'm scared." I looked down and rubbed my temples. "I know what drugs do to people. Especially that big of an amount over only.. what, five weeks? I don't want to lose you."

He tilted my chin up, and made me look him in the eye. "You're not going to lose me, Caitlin." He kissed my lips softly. "I promise you."

"You can't know that. You could accidentally shoot up too much, or snort too big a line of Coke. You can't know that." I closed my eyes, trying not to cry. "You can't know that. You can't."

He pulled me to him, and I wrapped my arms around his neck and buried my face in his shoulder. "You're right. I can't know that."

For the first time in five weeks, I was actually .. being held by Aaron, and I could finally feel how thin he'd gotten. That was the end of my fuse.

I started bawling, and Aaron rubbed my back, and ran his hands through my hair. He never told me it would all be okay; he probably knew it wouldn't. I knew it too.

And that's what terrified me most.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter Nineteen**

Right now, I was sitting in front of the window in my room with my acoustic guitar. If Aaron was home, he hadn't come up to find me yet.

I played a few chords until I found the one I was looking for.

I closed my eyes, and played the intro.

"I looked away, then I looked back at you. You tried to say things that you can't undo. If I had my way, I'd never get over you. Today's the day.. I pray that we make it through. Make it through the fall, make it through it all! And I don't wanna fall to pieces, I just wanna sit and stare at you. I don't wanna talk about it. And I don't want a conversation. I just wanna cry in front of you. I don't wanna talk about it, cos I'm in love with you." I could feel my fingers starting to shake. "You're the only one I'd be with 'till the end. When I come undone, you bring me back again. Back under the stars, back into your arms! And I don't wanna fall to pieces, I just wanna sit and stare at you. I don't wanna talk about it. And I don't want a conversation. I just wanna cry in front of you. I don't wanna talk about it, cos I'm in love with you."

I faintly heard the door open. I knew I was being listened to. "Wanna know who you are, wanna know where to start. I wanna know what this means. Wanna know how you feel! Wanna know what is real! I wanna know everything, everything! And I don't wanna fall to pieces, I just wanna sit and stare at you. I don't wanna talk about it. And I don't want a conversation. I just wanna cry in front of you. I don't wanna talk about it. And I don't wanna fall to pieces, I just wanna sit and stare at you. I don't wanna talk about it. And I don't want a conversation. I just wanna cry in front of you. I don't wanna talk about it, cos I'm in love with you, I'm in love with you. Cos I'm in love with you, I'm in love with you. I'm in love with you."

A sob ripped out of my chest, and before I knew it, Aaron's arms were around me, and I was crying into his chest.

"Are you okay?" he asked quietly, rubbing my back.

"Not.. not really. I guess so." I wasn't making sense.

"Caitlin, you're contradicting yourself," Aaron laughed. "What song was that?"

"Fall to Pieces by Avril Lavigne." I chuckled darkly. "I don't wanna fall to pieces, but I'm thinking I just did."

"Ha. If you did, I'll pick up the pieces."

I pulled away from Aaron slightly, and looked up at him. He wiped some of my tears.

Making it so that I was down on my knees, I leaned in and kissed him, putting my hands on his thighs.

He hesitated only for a second, and then he kissed me back, and leaned me all the way back until I was laying down, propped up by my elbows. He had his hands around my wrists, and had a leg in between my own.

When he pulled away, I whispered breathlessly, "Well, now that you have me pinned, what're you gonna do to me?"

He kissed my neck repeatedly. "I'm gonna.. Hmm.." He kissed it again, this time biting it lightly, and then kissing up to my ear, where he whispered back, "I'm gonna rape you with my tongue."

I shivered. "I'd like that. A lot."

He kissed me again, this time roughly. "I know you would."

I freed one of my hands, and pulled at the bottom of Aaron's shirt. He caught the jist of what I was implying, and paused what we were doing to take it off, which caused me to growl slightly. He chuckled, and slid his hands into my sweatshirt.

"You're wearing less than I am," I said.

"Can we change that?" he said, kissing my neck.

"You can fix that." Speaking was a very difficult thing for me to accomplish.

He pulled my sweatshirt over my head and threw it to the side. All I had on underneath was a black bra, and a black thong, of all things.

Aaron kissed me again, and I definitely kissed him back, that is, until he ran his fingers down the length of my back, which caused me to moan.

"Gahh. That fucking moaning kills me," he said, kissing my neck again, and moving up to my ear, which caused me to whimper and arch my back slightly. "Jeez."

"Your fault," I managed.

"No," he chuckled. I leaned in and kissed his neck, and he pulled at my bra strap. "Take it off."

"You take it off," I said against his neck.

He unhooked my bra, and took it off, making sure his fingers danced around along my spine, causing me to shiver.

The shivering got worse as he kissed me, and then kissed his way down my chest, which wound up causing me to moan once more. He growled.

"You did it," I gasped.

He chuckled, and I hitched my leg over his hip.

I reached in between us, and tried to unbutton his jeans. He finally couldn't take my hands being there anymore, because he unbuttoned them, and I kicked them off with my feet, and kissed his neck again.

"I could just eat you," I growled.

I ran my fingers down his back, and he gritted his teeth. "You're such a fucking tease."

I couldn't answer, because he then ran his own fingers down my back and across my stomach, which caused my head to fall back, and me to screw my eyes shut.

He rubbed lower, and it was becoming hard to restrain a moan.

Trying to keep my mouth shut, I trailed my fingers over his stomach, along the waistband of his boxers.

He slid his hand over my thigh, and I finally couldn't take it anymore. I moaned, and he growled. "I told you, that moaning fucking kills me."

"That's why I do it," I choked out as he tugged at the side of my thong.

"Take 'em off."

"You take them off."

He slid my thong down slowly, and I shivered again, and then brushed my hand against the front of his boxers.

He leaned in and kissed me forcefully, of which caused me to part my lips and kiss him back, full force. He slipped his tongue in, and I moaned, and tugged on his boxers.

"You want me to take them off?"

I swallowed as he pulled them off and tossed them to the side. We hadn't had sex in over a month, and I was getting very wound up on the inside.

Aaron leaned forward, and kissed me again, all the while sliding his hand down my side and over my hip. I arched my back, and moaned when my hips met his. He groaned, and bit my lip. I lifted my hips to meet his again, and he pulled my lip between his teeth. Ooh, kinky.

His fingers danced along the inside of my upper thighs, and my legs were close to shaking. He was in dangerous territory, and if I didn't get what I wanted soon, I was going to explode.

I managed to roll us over, and I grinned.

"Oh, I'm in trouble now," he said, chuckling.

"Oh, yes. You've been a naughty boy." I smirked, and leaned down, kissing his neck. I could tell he was holding back a groan.

I kissed lower, going down his chest, nipping at it in random places. He let out a groan when my teeth met his skin.

Still going lower, I could hear his breathing getting more and more shallow. I kissed back up his body, and he growled.

"You're such a tease."

"Oh, you haven't seen yet," I whispered, and he swallowed, his eyes widening.

I sat down on his stomach, and slowly slid down until he was pressed against my back, and then I rocked back and forth.

"Agh," Aaron choked out, sliding his hands up my legs.

I did it again, and he grabbed my hips. "Stop. You're driving me nuts."

"That's the point."

I tried to rock back and forth again, but Aaron was holding me too hard. Instead, I pushed down and jerked back. He growled again.

"Damn you."

I leaned down and pressed my lips to his ear. "You like it."

"That may be so.. But I'd like it better if you were on me."

"Oh, so would I." I kissed his neck.

I sat up and slid back farther, moaning loudly.

We fixed it. Oh, we fixed it big time.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter Twenty**

Heh. What can I say about the next two weeks after that night? I can't say shit about it, except that Aaron used again, and wound up deciding that if he'd done it once, apparently it was alright to just start up again.

For once, he had actually come home at 6 PM. This was the first time in at least three days, maybe four.

I was in the kitchen, eating a container of Ramen Noodles and eyeing him, trying to figure out what he was on. He hadn't acted like this before.

He had his face practically pressed up against the mirror in the hall, and kept moving around like he was trying to get a clear view of something. He apparently gave up.

"Dammit," he said, walking into the kitchen.

"Yes..?" I asked, my fork in mid-air.

"My pupils are still really dilated." He sat down across the table from me and put his head on his arms. I bored holes into the top of his head.

"So, you're still really high?" I asked nonchalantly, spearing a carrot in the bottom of the container so hard that I'm amazed I didn't go straight through it.

"No," he said, his voice muffled. He looked up at me. "Not.. really.. high."

I frowned. "Then what is your definition of really high?"

"Like passed out, overdosing," he muttered, pinching the bridge of his nose. I pushed away my unfinished Ramen Noodles. I wasn't hungry anymore.

"Aaron, what the fuck are you jacked up on tonight?" I asked, point blank. He didn't say anything for a minute, and just stared at me, blinking every few seconds, as if he couldn't believe I had just done that.

"..I don't really wanna tell you." I sighed and grabbed his arm, turning it over. "What're you doing?"

"You didn't shoot up, but that doesn't mean you didn't snort." He looked at me like I had grown a second, third, and fourth head. "Aaron, tell me. What. Are. You. Jacked. Up. On?" I enunciated every word so that it sounded like its own sentence.

He looked at the wall. "I don't want to tell you. It's bad."

I looked at him like he was stupid. "Like crack, heroin, and meth aren't bad?"

"You have a point there.."

"Tell me what you're on." It wasn't a question, or a statement. It was a demand. A fucking demand.

"OxyCotton." I cringed.

The actual name for it was OxyContin, and it was a major painkiller. I had been on it once when my mom broke my arm in ninth grade. I loved the stuff.

"You snorted it, didn't you." It didn't come out sounding like question, and, I guess it wasn't, because we both knew that I already had the answer.

I pushed my chair back from the table and stormed outside, not even bothering to put on shoes.

"Caitlin?" Aaron called after me, but I didn't look back. I couldn't look back.

My feet pounded along the street, which felt cool and rough underneath my feet. I turned and began running between houses. I didn't know where I was going, and I, quite frankly, didn't care. As long as it got me far away.

I could feel my muscles tightening, and my lungs constricting, but I still didn't stop. I had tears running down my face, and I had scratches on my legs.

I screamed when I slipped in the wet grass and landed face first. I stayed there, and just cried, and cried, and cried, vaguely wishing I had something - anything - sharp with me, even if it meant hurting Aaron. He'd hurt me, so why not? I doubt I could wound him as deep as he had wounded me with anything I could ever do to myself. I don't think it was possible in any shape or form.

I dug my fingers into the dirt, and let out another sob, this time nearly choking, for I could barely get any air; I was crying too hard.

My head started to buzz, and so did my fingers. I wasn't getting enough oxygen. I also didn't care. Being unconscious would bring me some peace of mind, which was something I desperately needed.

What little I could see through my tear-filled eyes began to tunnel, and I started coughing, even while still crying. I sort of found it all funny, although I'm not sure why. I wanted to laugh, but I couldn't.

Everything began to tingle fiercely, as if I were in a massage chair, and then all went black.

_ _ _

I looked over at the clock. It was nearly ten after ten, and Caitlin hadn't come back yet. I felt like a total ass for not going after her, but I just hadn't been up to it. I hadn't wanted to fight with her over something that we both knew was technically pointless.

But, now that it was getting later and later, I was feeling more and more like an ass, and was becoming more and more worried.

At 10:20 I grabbed my car keys and went in search of her.

I drove everywhere I could think of as it started to drizzle lightly.

Cursing in frustration, I slammed my fists into the steering wheel, and pulled a U-ey, returning back the way I came, but turning onto a side road, desperate for any place she might be.

I nearly missed it, but along the line of trees leading back towards the small river, there was something white on the ground. Caitlin was wearing a white shirt.

I hit the brakes and flung open the door, and jogged through the now steadily falling rain. I made a small noise of regret as I found Caitlin, lying face-first into the ground, her fingers dug into the dirt, and completely pale.

I crouched down and pressed my fingers to her neck. She had a pulse, thank God, but she was breathing shallowly.

I ran my fingers through my hair, and sighed, and then scooped her up and carried her back to the car.

She had scratches all over her body, and she was covered in mud.

Laying her in the backseat, I covered her with my jacket and sped off towards home.

I was officially the worlds biggest asshole.

* * *

When I woke up, the first thing I did was lurch to the bathroom and get violently sick.

Stumbling back into the bed after washing out my mouth, I lay down and look at the ceiling.

Aaron had apparently found me. I sighed. Did he ever think about the fact that maybe I didn't want to be found? No, of course he didn't.

I didn't move when a light knock came from the door and he walked in the room.

"..Hey," he said quietly.

I didn't answer him.

He sighed. "I deserve the silent treatment."

Once more, I didn't answer him.

"Caitlin, I'm sorry. I acted like an asshole. I should have come looking for you. I'm sorry."

This snapped my ten second silent treatment, and I turned to stare at him. "You're. Sorry? You're SORRY?" He cringed.

"Yes. I'm sorry."

Wrong thing to say.

I sat up and tried to hold myself back from strangling him. "If you were sorry, you'd stop doing fucking drugs, now, wouldn't you?!" I shouted at him. "You don't give a about me, do you?" He didn't answer. "DO YOU?!"

"YES, I GIVE A DAMN ABOUT YOU!" Aaron shouted back.

"Funny way of showing it! Packing as many chemicals in your body as possible doesn't show me you love me, you know! It shows me that you care more about those fucking drugs than you do about me!" My voice shook. I hated that my anger was hardwired into my tear ducts. "Aaron, it hurts me. It hurts me physically to see you doing this to yourself!"

He opened his mouth, but no noise came out.

"It honestly does make me wonder if you care about those fucking drugs more than you care about me. And do you know what that can do to a person inside? It rips them apart piece by piece."

Aaron pinched the bridge of his nose. "Caitlin, I'm sorry."

"STOP TELLING ME YOU'RE SORRY, AND FUCKING SHOW IT TO ME!" I screamed, tears beginning to run down my face. "Don't tell me things you don't mean."

"..I.. I don't know how.. to show it to you," he said evenly. "And I do mean it."

"You know how to fucking show it to me, Aaron. You do. You know you do. You just don't want to think about it, because it'll mean giving away the high, the rush. And it'll mean me being happy again."

He looked right at me. "You don't think I want you to be happy?"

I laughed darkly. "Sure as hell doesn't seem like it, because you know exactly what the hell it is you need to do for either of us to be happy again, Aaron."

"You never were happy in the first place."

I was silent for a moment. "Yeah, well, who is ever fully happy any-fucking-how? I had you. That's all I needed."

"You still have me."

"NO I DON'T! What part of that are you not grasping?!" I shouted again. "The only thing that has you is fucking drugs! And Aaron, for fuck's sake, it's killing me, and it's killing you." My whole body was shaking. "You know it is, too."

"Yeah, I guess I do."

"And you don't give a fuck, do you?"

He didn't answer, and I shouted in frustration, and stormed out the door, shoving him aside as I did so.

I pounded down the stairs and grabbed the car keys, once again not bothering to put on shoes, and climbed in, backing out almost as soon as I had shoved the keys into the ignition. I hadn't even fully closed the door yet.

I put the pedal to the metal, as you could say. I was driving at least 80 in a 30 MPH speed zone, and I give a rat's ass who stopped me.

I slammed on the brakes outside of a house that was painted light yellow, and charged up to the door, and pounded on it with my fist so hard I felt like I was going to either break the door or my hand, whichever came first.

Lucas Conroy opened the door, and the first thing I did was draw my arm back and punch him in the face, and, as he fell back, I pushed my way into the house and sat on his stomach, and clenched the front of his shirt in my hands.

"Now listen here, you fucking asshole, you are to stop giving Aaron drugs or I'll kill you, you hear me?!" I growled at him.

"What the hell..?" I looked up, and Steven Kelley was standing there. He realized it was me, and he backed away so quickly he fell over a chair.

"You can't tell me what to do," Luke snapped.

"Like hell, I can," I said back.

He grabbed my ass, and I did the first thing I thought of: I slammed his head into the hardwood floor.

"You wanna try that again?" I snarled, pushing my fist against his windpipe.

Apparently his hand twitched, because Steven said, "Don't do it, man. I really think she'll fucking kill you."

"He's right. I won't hesitate. I know how to kill someone, Lucas."

"Stop calling me Lucas," he choked. I lessened the pressure on his neck, and said,

"I don't do what you want me to, Conroy. I never have, and I never will."

"Yeah, well, your boyfriend sure as hell seems to."

"And what the fuck does that mean?" I swear, if he kept talking he wouldn't even be able to talk anymore. I'd break his neck.

"That'd sound better as who the fuck instead." He smirked, thinking he had got to me, which he sure did, but I wasn't going to do what he wanted, which was obviously get off him and go crying to Aaron, and break up with him.

"You lying son of a bitch!" I screamed, slamming his head into the floor with each word.

All of a sudden, a pair of hands were yanking me off the nearly unconscious Luke, and as I was pulled off him, I aimed a very hard kick in between his legs, and he groaned, curling up in a little ball.

"LET ME GO, STEVEN! LET ME KILL THE FUCKING BASTARD!"

Steven wrestled me out the door as I tried to kick him in the shins with the heels of my feet, and I know I hit him several times, but he kept dragging me.

He finally threw me up against the side of the car, and pinned me there. "Good fucking GOD, Evans, do you want to go to jail for murder?!"

"And do you want to go to jail for about a million dollars worth of drugs?" I snarled back. "LET. GO. OF. ME."

He let me go, and he stormed back into the house. I heard the lock click.

I kicked the car, and left a small dent, not caring that I had just re-broken my pinkie toe for the fifth time since I was nine.

Climbing into the car, I slammed my fists into the steering wheel, and screamed in frustration, and peeled away from the house.

When I parked in the driveway, Aaron was sitting on the front steps.

"Where did you go?" he asked.

"I just took care of a little business," I said, and stomped into the house and upstairs, and locked myself in the bathroom.

I took one look at the mirror and, for the second time that day, drew my arm back and slammed my fist into it, and watched it shatter. Pain shot up my arm, but I didn't care; It felt amazing. I slammed my fist into the mirror once more, and shards fell out, and clattered into the sink.

The doorknob shook back and forth. "Caitlin? What's going on?"

"Oh, nothing," I said, and punched the mirror a third time.

"Caitlin, come on. Open the door!"

I ignored him, and pulled open a cabinet, searching for an empty jar. I finally found one, and I threw it on the floor, and it exploded.

Aaron pounded on the door. "Dammit, open the fucking door!"

"No." I stepped onto the pieces of glass and let out a small shudder. I jumped once, and shouted in pain.

"Caitlin, I swear, if you don't open this door in five seconds, I will break it down," Aaron said.

I sat on the toilet lid and picked the pieces of glass out of my feet, and then stepped over the glass and stood in front of the door. "I wouldn't do that. My face is right in front of it. You break it down, you break my nose."

"God dammit, I'm not playing games! Just open the door!"

I sighed, grabbing a piece of glass and shoving it into my pocket before opening the door. "Happy?" I snapped, making my way past him and leaving the room.

Once I got into the kitchen, I could hear him thundering after me.

As I rinsed my hands off and ignored the bloody footprints on the floor behind me, Aaron asked, "What in the hell was that?"

"I couldn't kill Luke so I killed the the mirror," I said calmly.

"You what?" He spun me around. "What the hell?"

"I bashed his head into the ground six times and just made it so he can't have kids. Steven wouldn't let me bash his head into the floor a few more times so I took my frustration out on the mirror," I said, looking straight into his eyes.

"..Oh my God."

"Yeah," I muttered, turning back around, and wetting a washcloth. I hopped onto the counter and began to wipe the blood off my feet, pulling out pieces of glass I happened upon along the way. Aaron just sat in a kitchen chair and watched me, like he couldn't believe I just tried to kill his dealer.

Getting off the counter, I made my way into the living room and lay down on the couch, and turned my back to the rest of the world, and let a deep sleep overpower me.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter Twenty One**

_If you like it, then you shoulda put a ring on it! If you like it then you shoulda -_

"Hello?" I asked, pushing my bangs out of my face, and trying to keep my cell phone against my ear.

"Caitlin?"

"Yeah, Jessi?" I looked at the clock. The red LED lights glared the numbers 3:30 AM back in my face.

"Uhm.." Her voice got slightly distant, as if she had her head turned away from the mouthpiece of her phone. "I'm on the phone with Caitlin. Yeah, I'll tell her."

"Jessi? What's going on?" She normally didn't call me at 3:30 in the morning for no apparent reason.

"I'll tell you in a minute, but.. Aaron says hi, and that he loves you." I coughed. Aaron was with her?

"Uhm, tell him I love him, too," I said, pushing my bangs out of my eyes once more.

I was now fully sat up in bed, the blankets tangled around my legs.

"She loves you, too. I'll be right back," Jessi told Aaron, and then I believe she went outside, for I could hear what sounded like wind and cars passing by. "You still there?"

"Yeah. What's going on?" I repeated, twirling a lock of my hair around my finger.

"Aaron showed up at my apartment at like, midnight, and told me he needed to talk to me." I interrupted her.

"And you're at your apartment right now?"

"Mhm." I let out a breath I hadn't realized I was holding in relief. "I bet you could make an accurate guess of what it is he wanted to talk to me about, can't you?"

"The drugs?" I asked quietly.

"Yeah." Her voice softened. "Caitlin, why did you lie to me when I asked if he was doing more than pot?"

"I.. I hoped it would just go away, although I knew it wouldn't happen. And I didn't want you to worry more than you already probably were going to worry," I all but whispered. "I'm sorry."

"You have no reason to be sorry," Jessi said. "Anyway.. He told me everything." My heart flew into my throat.

"What do you mean, everything?"

"He told me that Luke and Steven accosted him and invited him over, telling him it was to just mess around on RockBand and drink some beer, failing to mention anything about drugs of any sort. When he went over after calling you, he got buzzed, and Luke offered him a joint, and he, being himself, took it, not thinking about what could happen if he did." I picked at a spot on the blanket. "He doesn't really remember anything after that, except coming home and treating you like an ass."

"Yeah, he did treat me like an ass," I mumbled. "He pretty much barged in the door, said hi, and then asked me if we had any food, and then traipsed into the living room and stayed there for nearly the rest of the night, as far as I'm concerned."

"Yeah.. He feels bad about that. Uh.. He then started moving onto Valium and he popped Vicodin tablets," Jessi said. I already knew about that. "He did some Acid, and Opium.. He told me that you caught him taking Ritalin."

"Yeah," I said. "He nearly choked when he realized I was in the kitchen."

"Of course he did. He did Extacy, and Cocaine, Meth, Heroin, and GHB.. He also told me that you caught him smoking Meth."

I cringed. This was probably the worst thing that happened, excluding today. "That was.. when I knew it was really, really bad, because he was doing them in the house.. And because I knew what Meth did to people, and how it fucked up lives."

"Yeah, I know how it fucks up lives too, trust me," she said, and I blinked. Jessi cussed. I'd never heard Jessi cuss before. And I don't count ass as a cuss word. "The night he told you.. He told you you weren't going to lose him, didn't he?"

I nodded, and then remembered she couldn't hear me. "Yeah, he did.. And he stopped using for .. a week, maybe? But then he started back up again.. He snorted OxyContin, and that was pretty much all I could take." I sighed deeply. "I walked out on him and took off running. I remember running for a really long time, and falling down.. and crying so hard that I couldn't breathe. I must have passed out from lack of oxygen, and I guess Aaron found me, because I woke up in bed."

"Apparently you really scared him when you did that."

"He didn't tell me I had."

"Well, you did," Jessi said, and then coughed.

"And then that morning I blew up on him and accused him of not loving me." I sighed. "God, I'm the worst fucking person in the world."

"No you're not. He doesn't blame you for it. AHH!" Her voice got distant again. "Yes, Aaron?" She was silent for a second. "Alright." Her voice became clear again. "Caitlin, Aaron wants to talk to you. I'm gonna go back inside; I'm getting cold."

"Alright. Goodnight, Jessi," I said, and heard the faint shuffle of the phone being passed between hands.

"Hello?" Aaron asked timidly, probably afraid I was going to hang up on him.

"Hey," I said quietly. "I love you."

He was silent for a second. "I love you too, Caitlin. And I mean it."

I choked on a sob, and wiped my now welling eyes. "I'm sorry I accused you of not loving me, Aaron. I know you love me."

He exhaled. "Don't cry, please." I tried my best to hold back the tears while he continued. "What you did today made me realize how much I was really hurting you."

"Which? Me screaming at you, nearly killing Luke, or hurting myself?" I asked, laughing darkly.

"All three, but why don't we start with the first?" he said.

"Okay," I whispered.

He sighed. "You accusing me of not loving you.. Hurt me, a lot, but I figure I deserve it if you ever wound up questioning how much I love you. I was angry that you had said it, but then it dawned upon me that you had said it for a reason, and not just because you were trying to be a bitch or anything. I felt like the worst person in the world. Maybe even the universe." I chuckled. "What?"

"Before you took the phone from Jessi, I told her I was the worst person in the world for accusing you of not loving me."

I could nearly hear the smile creep across his face. I knew that with the next things I was going to say, it would be wiped off his face within a millisecond.

"Aaron.. You hurt me so bad with using drugs. The reason I asked you if you cared about me was because it.. was beginning to seem like you cared about the drugs more than you cared about me." I wiped my eyes. "Have you ever been on that side of the line, where you're someones number one, and then something or someone comes along and you aren't anymore? You're their number two, and you don't seem to have any feelings? It's happened to me so many times.. but.. With you.. When I felt like you cared about the drugs more than you cared about me, it felt like I was being ripped apart, piece by piece. It was killing me inside. And then .. Watching you die before my eyes, slowly but surely, made that pain of being ripped apart multiply by ten million." He was still silent. "You were losing so much weight, Aaron, and you looked sick, as if you'd had the flu for weeks and weeks. You got pale, and you rarely sleep, that I can see. It's like you can't sleep, no matter how much you want to." I sniffled, and wiped my nose. "And then.. you started getting nosebleeds, and I know that's when there's a lot of snorting going on within a short time period with a lot of drugs, or a long time period.. And I know that it doesn't lead to anything remotely good. I just.. I don't.. want to lose you." A small sob erupted from my chest against my will.

He was silent except for his shaky breath, which told me he was either trying to refrain from punching something, or refraining from punching himself. I curled up under the blankets.

"Aaron?" I whispered.

"Yeah?"

"I love you. A lot. Don't forget that."

"I love you, too, and don't you forget that."

"I won't. Aaron, do you hate me for trying to kill Luke?"

He laughed. "No, but it's a little scary, to tell you the truth. The fact that you nearly rendered him unconscious and gave him a vasectomy with your bare foot makes me fear for my life, just a bit."

"Well, you know, bashing someones head into a hardwood floor at least six times usually knocks them out, and a well-aimed kick keeps the children away!"

I could practically hear him rolling his eyes. "It's.. almost four in the morning. Do you want me to come home?"

"Are you okay to drive?" Both him and I knew I wasn't only questioning how tired he probably was.

"Yeah, I'll be fine. It's only a ten minute drive."

"Okay. Drive safe."

"I will. Love you," he said, and hung up.

I flipped my phone closed and slid farther down into the blankets, wrapping them securely around my body, and closed my eyes.

I began to drift off when I heard a car door slam, and keys in the front door.

I vaguely saw Aaron come into the room. He laughed at me.

"You look like you're in a cocoon."

"It's warm in here," I mumbled.

"It looks warm."

"Care to join me?"

"Gladly."

He climbed into bed next to me after taking off his jeans and his shirt, and he was trying to get me to give him the blanket.

"I can't join you if you don't share the blankets."

"But you're coooollld," I protested.

"We can fix that," he muttered, yanking on the blankets.

"But I don't wanna be coooollld."

"I'll just go sleep in the living room, then.."

"NO!" I shouted, and opened the blanket so he could get between them. "Holy shit, you are cold."

"The wind is freezing," he said, draping his arm across my waist.

I pressed a kiss to his chest. "Stupid wind."

"Mhm," he muttered, and kissed my forehead. "Good night, or morning, whichever you prefer. I love you."

"I love you, too," I said, barely coherent.

Within the next few minutes, or, in my case, seconds, we both fell asleep.


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter Twenty Two**

As I dipped my Frito into my chili, Aaron cleared his throat. I looked up at him.

"Caitlin?"

"Yes..?"

"Do you think I should go to rehab?" he asked quietly, and then stirred his chili.

I blinked. "Do you think you should go to rehab?"

"I think.. it would be a good thing for me to try," he finally said.

I set down my spoon and looked him hard in the eye. "Aaron, are you sure? I know I'm going to sound like a pamphlet, but.. You can't get help unless you want help."

"I want help," Aaron said evenly.

I swallowed the lump that had arisen in my throat. "That's good."

"It's gonna be hard, though." I nodded.

"Yeah, it will be, but that's the truth, and it's just something you'll have to overcome," I said, hoping I wasn't honestly sounding like a rehab pamphlet. "I just want you to get better."

He sighed and looked down. "Yeah, so do I."

I got out of my chair and sat in the one next to him, and put my head on his shoulder. "I love you so much," I said quietly.

"I love you, too." He kissed the top of my head. "I'm not all that hungry anymore."

"Me either."

We both left the kitchen without a word and made our way into the living room, where we curled up on the couch.

I lay my head on his chest, and trailed my finger down his stomach, trying to decide whether I should ask him what it was I wanted to ask.

"Aaron..?"

"Yeah?" he replied, running his fingers through my hair.

"Why did you go talk to Jessi?" He paused in combing through my hair, and then restarted again.

"I'm not sure. I guess because she's probably the only person in my family that I'm close to and don't hate, really. And I think she deserves to know, you know?"

"Yeah. But why'd you wait so long?"

"I'm not sure.. I guess I was hoping I could get out of it myself; not have to deal with telling her, going to rehab or anything.. Not have to deal with hurting you." He kissed the top of my head. "What did you and Jessi talk about? You don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

I sighed. "She told me everything you told her.. And I filled her in on the parts you didn't remember.. And my thoughts and feelings about it.. About how I was getting scared I couldn't take it anymore, and how scared I was." He kissed the top of my head again.

"I'm sorry."

"I know you are, Aaron. I know you are."

"Especially because I drove you to cutting again." I could feel his voice rumble in his chest, and I could hear the remorse.

I began to run my finger over his stomach again. "It's not your fault I picked up the razor blade again, Aaron. It would have happened anyhow, and we both know it. This just.. all sped it up, a little. But it was coming. I could feel it."

A brittle silence filled the room, and neither Aaron, nor I wanted to be the one to break it.

I held my breath as Aaron grabbed my wrist and turned it over.

There were at least a hundred little one inch cuts all over my arm and wrist.

Aaron ran his finger over them, and down the deep ones traveling down my veins, and then gingerly touched the dark scars in my wrist, as if he were afraid they could still open.

"You're not going to do anything like this again, are you?" Aaron asked quietly.

I looked up at him. "I — I don't.. think.. so," I whispered, and I could feel him tensing underneath me. "You know I never know when I'm gonna lose it again, Aaron."

"I know, but please, don't. I don't think I can handle that again." He turned my arm back over.

"..What would you do if I did kill myself?" I asked, playing with his fingers.

"I'd.. I would probably take my anger out on someone, and then I'd probably kill myself, too." He ran his free hand through my hair. "Why? Are .. you planning on killing yourself?"

"I — no, not.. " I trialed off.

"Not.. at this particular moment?" he asked, his voice shaking slightly.

"I.. well, I've.. I can't truthfully say the thought hasn't crossed my mind lately," I said. "I.. The only reason I didn't do it was because of you." I wiped my eyes. "I couldn't do that to you. I.. It was hard for you finding me with my wrists slit." I could feel him tense again. "And you finding me actually dead isn't something I think I could do to you, or put you through."

"Well, that's good.." He sighed, and I turned over so that we were chest to chest.

"Aaron, if I'm planning suicide, you'll know," I said, and kissed him softly. I trailed my index finger down his cheek, and he closed his eyes. "I promise."

"What would you do if I killed myself?" he asked so quietly that I almost didn't hear him.

"I'd hurt myself really bad, and, if that didn't kill me, kill myself," I replied without even having to think about it.

"Can we change the subject?" I kissed his forehead.

"C'mon. Let's go to bed."

We made our way upstairs, and when we got to our room, we lay as close to each other as was humanely possible.


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter Twenty Three**

It was the night — okay, day — that Aaron was leaving for rehab, and we were making sure he had everything he needed.

"Yes, I have it all. Can we just stop talking about it for now?" Aaron asked, throwing a shirt into his duffel bag.

"Yeah.. You know what sucks, though?" I said, picking up and folding the shirt he had just thrown in.

"Hmm?"

"You'll be missing my birthday."

He looked at me. "Then I'm not going," he said.

"Oh, yes you are. You need this," I replied firmly, zipping the bag. No ifs, ands,or buts."

"God, you make it sound like you're just dying for me to leave already," he muttered.

I sighed and walked around the bed. Standing in front of him, I put my arms around his neck, and stood up on my tip-toes, pressing a kiss to his lips. "I don't want you to go, but you need to. Both you and I know it, Aaron."

He placed his hands on my waist and kissed my forehead. "I know, but I'll be missing your birthday. I can't do that."

I smiled. "Sure you can. by then, I'm sure you'll be able to have visitors, and before you leave, you can tell me happy birthday, you know."

"It still won't be the same."

"Aaron, you hated me during my birthday last year. I doubt you even knew who I was."

"I didn't hate you.. I just.. thought you were weird, that's all," he said, a small smile playing on his lips.

"You still think I'm weird," I pointed out.

"Only because I love you." I blinked.

"How in the hell does that make sense?" I laughed.

"It doesn't."

"I thought so." I kissed his jaw. "You know.." I kissed it again. "We have at least five hours until you leave.." I trailed off suggestively.

He chuckled. "You horn-dog."

I mumbled against his neck, "I'm not the one with the erection, now, am I?" He squeezed my waist.

"Well, that one is your fault." I stopped my assault on his neck and looked up at him.

"Oh, really now? I thought it was Megan Fox's fault."

He rolled his eyes and slid his hands over my ass. "Nah. It's all you, babe." I snickered and kissed his jaw again. He gripped my butt tighter, and pulled our hips together. "Are you trying to kill me?" he growled in my ear. I chuckled.

"Possibly.." I slipped my fingers underneath his shirt and pulled it off his head.

"And now you're undressing me," he laughed. I pressed my lips to his chest.

"Yeah.. you need a shower before you go. I will supervise." I opened the bathroom door and pushed him through. "The supervisor will be in in a few minutes."

"Supervisor my ass," he said.

"I'm supervising that as well! This angle is very nice!" I could hear him laughing as he unzipped his jeans.

After grabbing a pair of panties and a bra, I made my way into the bathroom.

Aaron peeked around the curtain, and I pulled my shirt off, and then slid my jeans down, kicking them off. I then un-clasped my bra and stepped out of my panties.

I laughed at how wide Aaron's eyes were. "Aaron, babe, my face is up here."

He looked up into my eyes, and the lust and passion that filled his own made me shiver.

"Get in here."

I smiled, and climbed into the shower.

Before I even had my hair wet, Aaron had me pressed against the cool shower wall, which made my nipples harden.

He pressed his lips to my neck, and I smirked. "Someone's a little frisky, aren't they?"

He didn't answer, but instead slipped his leg in between my own, which caused me to whimper.

Kissing my neck, Aaron ran his fingers up and down my back, which caused me to shiver and lean my head back against the wall.

Aaron kissed his way down my chest, pausing to give my boobs some much needed attention.

Biting my lip, I dug my fingers into Aaron's waist and closed my eyes.

His lips made their way back to my neck, and he mumbled against it, "Enjoying yourself?"

"Oh, God, yes," I said as his teeth grazed my pulse point. "You're driving me insane."

"How does it feel?" His voice rumbling against my neck sent pleasure all throughout my body.

"Amazing," I sighed.

He chuckled, and pressed his lips to mine.

When we parted, he whispered in my ear, "Then you'll love this," and slid into me, which caused me to all but scream.

* * *

We had three hours until Aaron left, and currently we were curled up in bed, and Aaron was playing with my hair.

"What do you find so fascinating about my hair?" I asked him, tilting my head back.

"What do you find so fascinating about my fingers?" he replied, right as I was going to pick up his hand.

"Touché.. But the things you can do with them are magical, though," I said, and we both started laughing.

"They are now, eh?"

"Oh, definitely. The screams resounding off the bathroom walls might have given you some insentive of that, you know."

"Why do you have to use such a big fucking vocabulary, man?" I growled.

"I'm a girl!" He chuckled.

"I think I know that."

"And I use such a vast vocabulary because I know it confuses you and makes you angry." I smirked, and he rolled his eyes.

"It doesn't anger me, it just makes me want to hit you with something hard so you'll speak normally."

I blinked. "How would that make me speak like a normal person? It would probably render me unconscious, or even possibly render my speaking ability unusable completely."

"WILL YOU STOP THAT?!"

"Stop what, dear Aaron?"

"Stop talking like you're from 1903," he said. "You were born in 1992. Speak like you were born in 1992 for Godsakes!"

"Where's the fun in that?" I laughed.

"The fun is not making me feel stupid." He smiled.

"Hey, you're the one who skipped fifth grade, not me. If I had skipped fifth grade, they would have had to send me back to fourth grade," I pointed out. "I'm stupid, but I have a big vocabulary."

"How in the hell does that make any sense?"

"It just does."

"-n't," he said, turning my does into doesn't.

"Oh, shut up, will you?" I snapped in a British accent.

"So now you're stupid, have a big vocabulary, and you're British?" Aaron asked, trying to stifle his laughter.

"Yes, you wanker."

"There is something wrong with you. Really."

"Stop quoting Finding Nemo. That's my job."

He slapped his palm to his face. "You really do have something wrong with you."

I pointed at him, grinning. "I think I found it."

He growled and rolled us over, pinning me underneath him. He started tickling me, and I began squealing and laughing, trying to get away from him.

"Noooo! Stooop! IT TICKLES!" I screamed, laughing so hard my stomach hurt.

"That's kinda the point," Aaron said, tickling my stomach.

"I SURRENDER! MERCY! MERCY! UNCLE!"

Aaron stopped tickling me, but stayed on top of me as I tried to catch my breath.

"You are an evil person," I said between gasps of air. "You are malicious."

"You love me." I rolled my eyes.

"I guess so." He kissed my nose.

"You know so." I smiled, and kissed his nose.

"Yeah, I do."

I looked up into his eyes, and then at his lips, and licked my own.

He smirked, and then kissed me.

It started out innocent enough, but it escalated into a full-on make-out session.

"Oh jeez. I'm sorry!"

Aaron and I pulled apart as quick as we could and slid away from each other, and Aaron wound up sliding onto the floor. He cursed quietly.

Jessi was turned around in the door, and I could see her neck slowly turning red. "I am so sorry."

I straightened my shirt and combed through my hair with my fingers. "Oh, it's fine.." Aaron was still on the floor, cursing. I hit him in the head with a pillow and told him to shut up.

Jessi's neck was still bright red, and she continued talking to the door so she didn't have to look at us. "I was just, um, hoping we could all have.. dinner.. together, you know, since Aaron's leaving tonight.. But if you two wanna continue what you were doing.." she trailed off in a nervous laugh.

"Yes, please," Aaron muttered, and I hit him with the pillow again. "Ow," he whispered.

"Sure," I said, and just hit Aaron once more for good measure.

"Stop that!"

"Is it safe to turn around now?" she asked, and I could see her neck slowly returning back to its normal shade.

"Yes," I replied, rolling my eyes.

Jessi turned around, and I blinked once. She had definitely gotten a baby bump.

"Aaron, why are you on the floor?" she asked, pushing a strand of hair out of her face.

"Oh, I don't know." Muttering, he got off the floor and sat next to me on the bed. "Maybe it has something to do with this thing right here who kept beating me with a pillow."

I hit him again and he fell back off the bed, and then I smiled sweetly at Jessi. She raised her left eyebrow.

"So, where were you thinking of going to dinner?" I asked as Aaron got off the floor for the second time in five minutes.

"Hmm.. Mexican food?"

I started laughing. "Olé!" I shouted, and accidentally hit myself in the face.

"Is there something wrong with her?" Jessi whispered to Aaron.

"I ask myself that question every day," he replied, and I hit him with the pillow again.

* * *

We had just gotten back from El Dorado, and it was almost time for Aaron to leave. I wasn't going with them because we all knew how much harder that was going to be on both of us.

"I'll give you two a few minutes," Jessi said, and headed into the kitchen.

I sighed and wrapped my arms around Aaron, resting my head on his chest. "I don't want you to go," I mumbled into his shirt.

He kissed the top of my head and hugged me back. "I don't wanna go either, but we both know it's something I need to do."

"Yeah, I know," I said tonelessly. "This is gonna be really hard."

"For both of us," he said, his voice rumbling in his chest. I nodded and tried to hold back tears.

"How long do you think you'll be there?" I asked, my voice quavering.

"I don't know. As long as it takes, I guess.." I took a shaky breath, and Aaron tilted my face up so that I was looking directly into his eyes. "Please don't cry."

I blinked, and one tear slipped through. Aaron's thumb caught it, and he wiped it away.

"I'm trying, but it's so hard."

"I know. This is harder than I thought it was going to be." He smiled a small smile, and kissed me softly.

"Same here," I replied, wiping away tears that hadn't yet fallen.

"Please don't cry," Aaron repeated, kissing my forehead.

"I'm trying," I mumbled, burying my face back into his chest, as a sob erupted from my own.

Aaron didn't say anything; he just rubbed my back, and rested his chin atop my head.

"I'm sorry," I choked out when the flood of tears had subsided.

"It's okay."

"You asked me not to cry," I mumbled, wiping my eyes.

"Which was a pretty stupid thing for me to ask, given the situation." I lifted my head and looked up at him.

"Stop sounding smart. It's scaring me." He gave a short laugh, and kissed my forehead, and wiped a few tears that were still lingering on my cheeks.

"I love you," he said, and pressed his lips to mine.

The kiss was short and sweet, but it said everything he wanted to say but couldn't.

When we parted, I whispered, "I love you, too," back.

Jessi stuck her head into the living room. "I — We have to go," she said quietly, her left hand on her stomach.

Aaron didn't say anything for a minute. "Okay." Sighing deeply, he hugged me once more, kissed me softly, and let me go.

I handed him his duffel bag. "I love you."

He kissed my head, and said, "Te quiero mas que eyer, pero no tanto como manana," and I smiled.

"Con todo mi amor," I replied, and he smiled back, and then walked out the door, leaving me to collapse on the floor and cry.


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter Twenty Four**

My birthday was in four days, and I still had yet to hear from Aaron.

"Jessi," I started, rinsing a bowl, "do you think he's okay?"

"I'm not sure.. But they'd contact us if it was severe enough, wouldn't they?" she replied from the kitchen table, where she was counting how much money she had saved, and eating a sandwich.

"I guess you're right.." I twirled a steak knife around in my hands, running the serrated edge over my fingers.

Because of my promise — which Aaron had apparently told his sister about — Jessi rarely let me wash or use the knives in the house, and she had changed my razors to the kind you couldn't take apart without the jaws of life. She had even found my box of razor blades!

I gasped when pain shot up my arm; I had forgotten I had the knife in my hand, and had squeezed it.

I dropped the knife into the sink, and assessed the damage.

There was a long, deep gouge going across my palm completely.

I could hear Jessi struggling to get up as I ran very warm water over it, trying to get as much blood and pain out of my accident as possible.

"God dammit!" Jessi shouted right before she managed to get free.

She waddled over to where I was, glossy-eyed at the pink and red water running down the drain. She cursed, and dug in the drawer for the small first-aid kit I had begun keeping in the kitchen when I realized I get hurt a lot in the kitchen.

I barely moved when Jessi switched the warm water to cold, and then pulled my hand from underneath the tap all together, but I did screw my eyes shut at the feeling of her patting my hand dry.

"Am I hurting you?" she asked, nearly dropping the towel when she saw the look on my face.

"No, just the opposite," I mumbled.

She furrowed her brow and finished drying my hand, and then wrapped it up.

"Was this an accident?"

"Yeah. I forgot what I was doing.. I don't even remember picking up the knife, really," I said, rinsing the sink out.

In my peripheral vision, I could see Jessi eying me, trying to figure out if I was lying or not. I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair, and realized my hands were shaking.

"I.. I'm gonna go lay down for a while, okay?" I mumbled, and walked around Jessi into the living room, where I lay down on the couch and closed my eyes. I fell asleep in no time, no doubt because of the stress I was under.

* * *

Through the fog in my mind, I could hear a phone ringing, and it was getting to be extremely annoying. I groaned, and sat up, rubbing my eyes with the palms of my hands, and remembered how I had cut my palm when the itchy gauze rubbed my forehead.

I could hear voices coming from the kitchen, and realized that the ringing phone had been my ringing phone.

After a few minutes, I heard the faint beep of the phone being turned off, and then Jessi came into the living room, her face grim. My heart nearly stopped beating.

"What happened?" I asked, my voice cracking.

Before answering me, Jessi sat down and ran her fingers through her blonde hair.

"Is it Aaron?" I asked, fear bubbling up inside me.

"Yeah," she said. "He.. He isn't doing too well. They may have to send him home because they're having a hard time controlling him."

My blood ran cold. "What.. what's wrong with him?" He'd only been gone for two weeks. What could have happened in that short time frame?

"He beat a kid up really bad.. and.." She sighed. "He tried to kill himself."

"Oh, God," I said, burying my face in my hands.

"They're probably gonna send him home," Jessi said. I could hear the worry laced in her voice.

"Will we then take him to another one?" I said quietly.

"Probably.. Our .. parents may do it." I almost cringed at the way she said parents.

"Okay," I mumbled.

"Are you going to be okay?" she asked, and I looked up at her. She looked exhausted.

"Yeah," I said. "Go on to bed."

Jessi was living with me for the time being, apparently to keep me safe or something.

"Okay.. I'll.. Goodnight." She made her way upstairs, leaving me downstairs, with a drawer full of knives, and my thoughts.


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter Twenty Five**

I was woken up by the hand on my shoulder that was shaking me so much that my teeth were chattering.

I opened my eyes, and I met Jessi's blue ones.

"Oh, thank God," she said, and sank back against the ottoman behind her.

I sat up, and rubbed my eyes. "What?"

I looked around and realized that I had thrown pill bottles everywhere, and some had opened, causing them to cover the floor like little pink, blue, and white dots. There was also a knife on the floor, but it was clean.

"I thought you'd overdosed or something," she said, her shaking left hand covering her eyes. "I couldn't tell if any of the bottles were empty, considering they were everywhere." She ran the hand that had been covering her eyes through her hair. "What happened last night after I went up to bed?"

"I.. I don't.. I had a panic attack, and I couldn't find the Lorazepam.. And I threw pill bottles.." I pinched the bridge of my nose. "I don't really know."

"Did you take any pills?"

"I don't think I did."

She sighed, and managed to get herself off the floor. "I'm gonna make some breakfast. Do you want anything?"

"Sure. I'll take whatever you give me," I said, beginning to group the pills together. "I'm gonna clean up."

"Okay," she said, and I could see her sliding the knife across the floor by the hilt with her foot. I decided against saying anything, and continued picking up capsules and tablets.

* * *

The day before my birthday, Aaron came home around eight, and he was in an extremely bad mood.

When he walked in the door, I stopped in the kitchen doorway, and played with the long black drawstring on my purple plaid pajama pants, and then played with the bottom of my charcoal grey tank top, and didn't say anything, and neither did he.

Aaron kicked off his shoes, took off his jacket, and bumped past me, headed for the stairs. A few minutes later, I heard our bedroom door slam shut. I choked back a sob.

Jessi wrapped her arms around me, and patted my back. "Don't take it personally, Caitlin. I've known him since he was born. This is just how he gets when he's in a really bad mood. He has a trigger temper most of the time. He'll cool down eventually." I nodded and rested my head on her shoulder. "It's gonna be okay, you know."

"Yeah, I know. It just seems like I did something to make him mad." I wiped my eyes. "Did I?"

"You didn't do anything, Caitlin. He's just mad because.." She trailed off.

"Because..?" I prompted.

"Never mind," Jessi said, patting my back again. "It isn't important."

I sighed, and let it go. "Okay."

"You hungry?"

"Not really, but I expect I need to eat something sooner or later." Jessi smiled and nodded.

I disentangled myself from her, and followed her into the kitchen, and sat at the kitchen table, grabbing a pen and a notebook. I flipped it open and began to write.

"Whatcha writing?" Jessi asked, a frying pan in her hand.

"A song that's stuck in my head. This is about the only way I know how to get them out of there," I said, continuing to write as I spoke.

"Ah. What song?"

"I can't think of the name right now, but I'll figure it out eventually," I replied, writing so fast my hand was beginning to cramp.

Before I knew it, Jessi had plopped a plate with three grilled cheese sandwiches on it in front of me.

"Put the pen down, and eat, young lady," she said smiling.

I grinned and picked one up. "They look great."

"Why, thank you. It takes vast culinary experience to create the delicacy known as the grilled cheese sandwich!" Jessi exclaimed, wiggling her fingers, and I burst out laughing.

"You are so much like your brother," I said, pulling my sandwich apart and dipping it in ketchup. "It's kinda scary, you know?"

"Yeah, we've been told that," she said, still giggling.

"I still say you two also look alike." Jessi rolled her eyes.

"No we don't!"

"You do."

"We do not."

"You do too."

"Do not."

"Do too."

"Not."

"Too."

"Not."

"Not."

"Too."

"HAHA!" I shouted, dropping my grilled cheese. "I WIN!"

"You used reverse psychology on me! That isn't fair!" she said, throwing a piece of crust at me.

I picked it up and stuck it in my mouth. "It is, darling, because you never said I couldn't use it." I smirked, and she pouted.

"You're mean."

"And you're a good cook."

"Flattery gets you nowhere." I raised my eyebrow. "Okay, maybe it gets you some places."

"Of course it does." Aaron came down the stairs, and I blinked. "Hey."

"Hey," he said, lifting his hand in a small wave. "Whatcha doin'?"

"Eating," I replied, picking at my sandwich. "You hungry?"

"Nah." He hopped up onto the counter and rested his head against the cabinets.

Jessi blinked a few times, and then turned to look at me. "What were we talking about?"

"..Um.. Right. About how you and Aaron look alike, and about how I had won by using my vast knowledge of the art of reverse psychology." Jessi rolled her eyes.

"We do not look alike!" She turned to Aaron. "Do we?"

"I thought we established the fact that you and I look nothing alike the first time you two met," he pointed out.

"..True.. But, you know, you two do. Really! As I said before, put Aaron in a blonde wig, or shave Jessi's head and you two are twins!" They both glared at me. "See? You two glare alike, too."

"Shut up already," Jessi growled.

"I love you, too," I said, and laughed.


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter Twenty Six**

I was woken up due to the fact that several little kisses were being pressed to my neck. I smiled, and opened my eyes. "Well, hello there."

Aaron laughed, and his breath against my neck caused shivers to race up my spine. "Good morning."

"A very good morning," I said, giggling as he continued to kiss my jaw line. "And why this wonderful wake-up call?"

"It's your birthday, silly," he said, kissing me some more.

"Oh, riiight," I mumbled, closing my eyes as Aaron ran his hand over my hip. "This is a really nice birthday present."

"I tried," he murmured, chuckling again. "This isn't all I got you, though."

"Oh, really?" I said, beginning to squirm. "What else did you get me?"

"You'll have to wait and see.."

"You're so mean." He pressed a kiss to my pulse point. "Oh, I hate you."

"If you hate me then you won't get your presents," he said into my ear, and I shivered.

"Oh, fine."

We both turned to stare at the door when a knock came from the other side. "Are all the clothes on?" Jessi called through it.

"Oh, no, we're just having sex, but you can come in!" I said, sitting up. Aaron did a facepalm and rolled his eyes.

"I'm a little scared to, even though you're being sarcastic," Jessi said.

"Come in! You'll get free porn!"

"Shut up, Caitlin," Aaron said, though I could see he was trying not to laugh.

Jessi opened the door anyway.

"YOU WANTED FREE PORN!" I shouted, and started laughing.

"I don't know what's wrong with her," Aaron said, shrugging.

I pointed at him as I tried to stop laughing. "He did it."

Aaron raised his hands. "I didn't do anything."

Jessi looked at Aaron and I, and then turned around and walked out. "You two are idiots!"

Aaron and I looked at each other and then cracked up.

After we stopped laughing, I got out of bed and stretched, my tank top riding up over my tummy. I giggled when I noticed Aaron was looking, and pulled my tank top down. "Hey, you, my face is up here," I said, and he looked up at me, and grinned. I rolled my eyes. "I'm gonna take a shower.. Umm.. Go downstairs and I'll be there when I get out."

"Why can't I join you?" he asked, his voice a mock sadness.

"I really don't think Jessi needs to be making breakfast and hear loud screams coming from upstairs, now, do you?" I said, rummaging in my drawers to find a bra and a pair of panties.

"I think she does," he replied, his voice in my ear. I shivered.

"Don't you even start this.." He placed his hands on my hips, and then splayed them out across my tummy.

"Start what?" he asked innocently, although I could hear the smirk in his voice.

"Seducing me," I muttered.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," he replied, nuzzling his face in the crook of my neck. "I'm not doing anything."

I shivered at the feeling of his breath fanning out across my neck again. "Not doing anything, my ass."

Aaron began to kiss and nip at my neck, and I slowly closed my eyes, but re-opened them again. "No, no, Aaron, we don't need to traumatize your sister anymore than we already have this morning.. C'mon, we can do this later." I pulled out of his grip, and turned to see him pouting. "Oh, don't even give me that look."

"..Is it working?" he asked.

I frowned. "No."

"Damn."

I snickered and went into the bathroom to start my shower.

_ _ _

Damn sister.

I made my way downstairs as I heard the water in the bathroom start, and muttered something about torture.

"G'morning," Jessi said when I entered the kitchen.

"Bleh," I replied, sitting down at the table, and resting my head on it. "Girls suck."

"What'd she deny you of this time?"

I looked up and glared at my sister. "Things."

"Haha, Aaron can't get laid," Jessi said in a sing-song voice, and stuck her tongue out at me.

"You can bite my ass," I replied in the same sing-song tone.

"I think I'll let Caitlin stick to that one," she said, and winked, as if she knew the ass biting had really happened.

I glared again, and then blinked, and stared at the kitchen when a very loud noise announced that Caitlin had begun singing in the shower.

"_NOBODY'S PERFECT! I GOTTA WORK IT, AGAIN AND AGAIN 'TILL I GET IT RIGHT! NOBODY'S PERFECT; YOU LIVE AND YOU LEARN IT! AND IF I MESS IT UP SOMETIMES.. NOBODY'S PERFECT! NOBODY'S PER-R-R-FICT! NAWH, NAWH! NOBODY'S PERFECT_!"

"Oh jeez," I said, and looked at Jessi to see that she had her hand over her mouth and was trying desperately not to laugh.

"Does she do this often?"

"Sadly, yes." _but it's usually screams, not singing, coming from the bathroom._

"Oh, dear," she replied as Caitlin then started singing Party in the USA at the top of her lungs.

"_I GOT MY HANDS UP, THEY'RE PLAYING MY SONG; THE BUTTERFLIES FLY AWAY! NODDIN' MY HEAD LIKE, YEAH! MOVIN' MY HIPS LIKE, YEAH! I GOT MY HANDS UP, THEY'RE PLAYING MY SONG, AND I KNOW I'M GONNA BE OKAY! YEAH-AH IT'S A PARTY IN THE USA!_"

"This is one of the times when I question why I love her, but you know, in the good way," I muttered.

"Oh, yeah, I understand you.. I'm starting to question why I love her now," Jessi replied, staring at the ceiling. I just chuckled and sat down on a chair at the table and waited for Jessi to finish making pancakes and bacon.

A few minutes later, Caitlin came down the stairs in nothing but a towel, and she was shaking her hips and singing, "I like to strip her down, she's naughty till the end! You know what she is - no doubt about it! She's a bad, bad girlfriend!" and I swallowed the lump that was rising in my throat, but I couldn't do anything about the lump that was forming in my pants. Shit.

Jessi's eyes widened. "You.. are so.. strange," she said, flipping over a pancake. "Your, erm, towel matches your eyes." She stifled a laugh as Caitlin turned in a circle.

"I know," she replied, and then snickered. "I like this seat," she said, sitting on my lap, and then tried to stifle a giggle.

I wrapped my arms around her waist and rested my head on her shoulder. "Why must you tease me?"

"Cos it's my birthday and I get to have fun," she replied, giggling some more.

"You're extremely giggly today, aren't you?" I said, smirking.

"Possibly," she replied, and began to play with my right hand.

"I still want to know why you find my hands so fascinating."

"They just are. They're so big compared to mine," Caitlin said, and pressed her left hand to my right hand. "See? They're huge."

I rolled my eyes and kissed her cheek. "You're so odd sometimes."

"You love me anyway," she said, turning her head and kissing me.

"Hey, hey, hey, none of that at the breakfast table!" Jessi said, waving her spatula at us as we pulled apart.

"Okay, mom," I said, smirking. She glared and threatened to beat me with the frying pan.

Caitlin didn't say anything. She just giggled until she couldn't breathe.

"Seriously, did you eat a whole bag of sugar while I was asleep or something?" I asked her as Jessi plated a stack of pancakes and plopped them in front of Caitlin and I.

"No," Caitlin said, her eyes darting back and forth.

"Now, you two, share those damn pancakes. I'm not making you any more of them. So share!" Jessi said, brandishing her spatula once more.

"Yes ma'am!" Caitlin replied, saluting my sister.

"Good grief," I muttered, and took a bite of my pancake. "Wow, Jessi can cook."

"I swear to God, Aaron, I will fry you in this pan," she replied.

Caitlin didn't say anything, once again. But instead of giggling, this time she was shoveling food into her mouth like she had never eaten before.

"Hey, Caitlin, you wanna try chewing?" I quipped, poking her with my fork.

She swallowed, and replied, "I do chew. I'm just really, really hungry, alright?" she said, and then poked me back, and stole the last bite of my pancake.

"Hey!" I protested, poking her leg with my fork.

"Haha," she replied, crossing her eyes at me.

"Jessi, she stole my pancake," I said, continuing to poke Caitlin in the thighs with my fork.

"Deal with it," she replied, observing us from the island.

"Some big sister you are," I muttered, as Caitlin then started attacking the rest of my pancakes.

"Stop it!" I shouted, and began poking her sides. She all but threw her fork in the air and started squealing and squirming on my lap, which probably wasn't the best thing for her to do.

"NO AARON! STOP POKING MEEEEE!" she shouted, the end of her sentence turning into a loud squeal, which grew louder as I kept poking her sides. "My towel is gonna fall off!"

"Who said that's a bad thing?" I laughed.

"I SAY IT'S A BAD THING!" Jessi exclaimed, and covered her eyes.

"MERCY!" Caitlin screamed. "YOU CAN HAVE YOUR PANCAKES! LEAVE ME ALONEEEEE!" she squealed, and I stopped poking her.

"Is it safe to look?" Jessi asked, turning her head blindly, for she was still covering her eyes.

"Yes, it's safe," Caitlin replied. "My junk is covered."

"Sadly," I muttered, and speared a chunk of pancake. "Oof!" Caitlin had elbowed me in the ribs. "What was that for?"

"Don't scare Jessi more than you already have," she whispered. I just rolled my eyes and finished breakfast while Caitlin trotted off upstairs to get dressed. She had no idea what I was planning for today.

* * *

I made my way up the steps — tripping only twice, mind you — and went into mine and Aaron's room to find something to wear.

I finally settled on a pair of black jeans and a red and black plaid top with lace on the top and bottom of it. I turned around in a circle in front of the mirror to make sure I looked okay, and then I put my hair up in a clippy, and it poofed into a waterfall behind my head.

As I started going down the steps I tripped — wow, big surprise there — and slipped right onto my butt. "GAHHH!"

Aaron peeked into the living room and saw me sitting on the last step, rubbing my butt. He quirked an eyebrow.

"..What're you doing..?"

"I fell on my ass," I replied, pulling myself up and then kicking the last step, which then caused me to hop around on one foot, holding my right foot, and massaging my big toe. "And now I think I broke my toe. STUPID STAIRS!"

Aaron blinked a couple times, and then went back into the kitchen. I hopped after him.

"Come back here!"

"You come get me," he called from the kitchen. I growled in return and hopped my way to the kitchen, and then rested against the wall and glared at him.

"You suck, you know that?" I muttered, gingerly putting my foot back onto solid ground. It didn't hurt too much, so it probably wasn't broken.

"So do you," he replied, and I felt the heat rush into my cheeks. "Aw, you're blushing."

"Shut up," I muttered, and walked across the kitchen and got a glass of water. When I finished it, I turned to the sink and began washing it, and two arms wrapped around my waist, and Aaron's head rested upon my shoulder. His hands began to play with the lace at the bottom of my tank top.

"How come I've never seen this shirt before?" he asked, and I shivered as his breath panned out across my neck and collarbone. "You should wear it more often. I like it."

"I guess I forgot I had it," I replied, putting the now clean glass in the dish drainer.

He slipped his fingers under my shirt and slid them along the waistband of my jeans.

"Well," he murmured in my ear, "now you know you have it."

I turned around to face Aaron, and now his fingers were gliding over my lower back. I slid my hands up his arms and draped them around his neck. I gave a crooked smirk.

"I have a birthday request," I said.

"Yes?" he asked, drawing out the e.

"Kiss me." He grinned back.

"With pleasure."

Aaron pressed his lips to mine, and I sighed contentedly.

The kiss started out completely innocent, but I then wrapped my arms tighter around Aaron's neck, and pushed myself closer to him, and he parted my lips with his tongue, and I gladly obliged.

Just as it began getting heated, a loud scream came from my left. Aaron and I pulled apart and turned to see Jessi standing there with her hands over her eyes. I burst into a fit of giggles and Aaron began to snicker.

"Must you do that in places where I can catch you?!" Jessi whined, peeking through her fingers.

"Hey, I started, trying to stop giggling, "it's not like you've never done it! You're pregnant for god sakes!"

Jessi removed her hands from her face and cocked her head to the side. "..I guess that's true.."

"You guess?" I squeaked.

"Oh, God, you've got her started," Aaron said, and walked into the living room.

"Can you not see the bump on your stomach?" I asked, throwing a dirty look at the doorway that Aaron had just vanished through.

"WHAT BUMP?!" Jessi exclaimed sarcastically. "OH MY GOD, I'M PREGNANT. WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?!"

I heard Aaron's roaring laughter coming from the living room.

"OH MY GOD, YOU'RE PREGNANT?!" I replied, throwing my hands in the air. "NO WAY."

"YES WAY."

"NO."

"YES."

"SHUT UP!" Aaron shouted from the living room.

"WHY DON'T YOU?" Jessi and I replied at the same time. Aaron didn't reply. I looked at Jessi and started to giggle. Why was I so giggly today?

I made my way into the living room and leaned over the back of the couch, draping my arms across Aaron's chest and pressing my cheek to his. "Whatcha doin'?" I asked, swaying back and forth.

"Oh, nothing. Just trying to pretend my sister and girlfriend aren't total idiots."

Jessi came into the room just then, with her keys in tow.

"Where're you going?" I asked as she slipped on her flip flops.

"I'm gonna go home, see what's up, and then I'm gonna go over to my apartment and get some more clothes and clean up a bit there," she replied, opening the door. "I'll be home.. you know, whenever I get here." She waved her fingers at us, and her keys jangled in her hand. "Now, you two don't have too much fun."

I gave a small snort. "Oh, we won't. We'll just have sex on the kitchen table. No biggie." She mimed gagging.

"Don't leave any scratches on it!"

"We won't!" I replied, and she gave a short laugh, and then left. I could hear her Impala start, and drive down the street. I turned back to Aaron, and slid my hands further down his chest. "Well, I think we're alone now."

"Stop quoting eighties songs," he replied. I flicked him in the side of the head. "Ow. What was that for?"

"It was cos you're a dorkface. And how in the hell do you know that song?" I raised my eyebrow. "It's a Tiffany song. You listen to Tiffany?"

"No, I don't, thank you very much," he retorted, crossing his arms and crushing my hands underneath them.

I coughed something that sounded oddly like "liar" and Aaron uncrossed his arms and turned around on the couch so he was facing me. He coughed something back that sounded oddly like "delusional." I glared, and coughed back "liar" once more. Aaron just rolled his eyes and poked my nose. I crossed my eyes to look at his finger.

"What're you doing?" he laughed.

"Glaring at your finger and willing it to burst into spontaneous flames. You?" I replied, still cross-eyed.

"You want me to burst into spontaneous flames?" he asked, aghast.

"Oh, yes. It'll just make you hotter than you already are," I said, finally uncrossing my eyes. I now had a faint headache. "Ow. Damn eyes."

"Aww," Aaron said, and kissed my forehead. He was smirking.

I stuck out my bottom lip, and Aaron kissed that too.

"Stop pouting," he said, pouting right back.

"No, you. It does things to me," I replied, and stuck my bottom lip out even farther. Aaron laughed.

"Oh, it does things to you?" he asked. "Such as?"

"Things," I replied, leaning in and kissing his lips. When I pulled away, Aaron smirked. "Shut up," I muttered. He just rolled his eyes and got up. "Where are you going?" I asked, following him with my eyes as he walked up the stairs.

I jumped up to follow him as he answered, "I'm going to go change my shirt and then we're gonna go somewhere."

I leaned against the wall at the beginning of the hallway, and Aaron came out of our room with a black t-shirt in his hands, and absolutely no shirt on. I twitched slightly, and then wolf-whistled.

Aaron looked at me with a bewildered expression on his face, and then just shook his head. I stuck my tongue out at him right as he pulled his shirt over his head, and walked the rest of the length of the hallway, and pressed a quick kiss to my lips.

"Where are we going?" I asked, following him down the stairs and into the living room.

"It's a surprise," he replied, slipping on his sneakers and handing me a pair of black flip flops. "Now hurry up."

"I'm coming, I'm coming," I replied.

We made our way outside into the warm, summer day, and climbed into the car, and we were on our way.


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter Twenty Seven**

"Where are we going?" I asked for the fifth time. "Tell me, plea —" Aaron reached over and covered my mouth. I licked his hand and he immediately jerked it away and wiped my spit on my pants. "Don't suffocate me."

"I'm not going to.. You know, yet," he replied, smirking. I snorted.

"Ooh. Bondage and asphyxiation," I purred, trailing my fingers up Aaron's leg. He burst out laughing and the car swerved just a bit.

"Turns you on, does it?" he asked, still laughing.

"Oh, yes. Strangle me, Aaron." This time I started laughing too at the pure idiocy of what I was saying. "Oh, we're so weird."

"Hey, you started it." I rolled my eyes.

A little less than five minutes later, we pulled up into the clearing that led to the bridge. I turned and gave Aaron a quizzical look, but he just smiled back at me. It was a smile that said, "You'll see." I wasn't completely sure if that was a good thing, or a bad thing. Aaron got out of the car, and I followed suit. Aaron laced his fingers through my own, and I rested my head on his shoulder as we began walking.

"So, why're we here?" I asked, rubbing my thumb along the side of his hand.

"You'll see," he replied, that same hint of what was to come in his voice that had been in his smile. I just sighed and rolled my eyes.

When we reached the odd outcropping of rock that the bridge was attached to, Aaron helped me up, and then hopped up next to me.

"Can you tell me now?" I asked, draping my arms around Aaron's neck.

He kissed my nose, and then reached in his back pocket, and pulled out a little remote. I eyed it curiously. He pressed the middle button, and from the bushes, music began to play. I quirked an eyebrow as Aaron placed the remote back into his pocket, and placed his hands on my waist and began to lead me in a slow sway.

"And what do we have here?" I asked.

_Since the moment I spotted you, like walking around with little wings on my shoes. My stomach's filled with the butterflies, ooh, and it's alright._

"Just a birthday surprise," Aaron replied, smiling.

_Bouncing around from cloud to cloud, I got the feeling like I'm never gonna come down. If I said I didn't like it, then you'd know I'd lied. Every time I try to talk to you, I get tongue tied. It turns out that everything I try to say to you comes out wrong and never comes out right. So I say, "Why don't you and I get together? Take on the world and be together forever? Heads we will, tails we'll try again." So I say, "Why don't you and I get together? Fly to the moon, and straight on to heaven? Cos without you, they're never gonna let me in."_

"I love this song," I whispered, and kissed Aaron's lips lightly.

"I knew you would."

_When's this fever gonna break? I think I've handled more than any man can take. I'm like a lovesick puppy chasin' you around. Ooh, and it's alright. Bouncing around from cloud to cloud, I got the feeling like I'm never gonna come down. If I said I didn't like it, then you'd know I'd lied. Every time I try to talk to you, I get tongue tied. It turns out that everything I try to say to you comes out wrong and never comes out right. So I say, "Why don't you and I get together? Take on the world and be together forever? Heads we will, tails we'll try again." So I say, "Why don't you and I get together? Fly to the moon, and straight on to heaven? Cos without you, they're never gonna let me in."_

Aaron pulled me closer to him as we swayed back in forth in time to the music.

_Slowly, I begin to realize: This is never gonna end. Right about the same time you walk by, and I say, "Oh, here we go again." Oh._

As the instrumental part started, I stood on my tip-toes and kissed Aaron, and I could feel his lips curl up into a smile, which caused me to do the same. When we parted, he leaned down and whispered, "Will you marry me?" in my ear, and I felt my heart stop.

"Are you serious?" I asked quietly, waiting for my heart to restart. Aaron reached into his back pocket again, and pulled out a small, platinum ring that had a single circular cut diamond in the middle. It was gorgeous. "It's so pretty."

"Will you marry me?" he asked again, his eyes filled with hope. It only took me a split second to decide my answer.

"Yes," I replied, and the most amazing grin crossed Aaron's features. He slid the ring onto my finger, and then kissed me with so much passion that it nearly knocked me off my feet. I say nearly because it was impossible for me to fall, probably because Aaron's left hand was in my hair and his right hand was pressing into my lower back.

_Every time I try to talk to you, I get tongue tied. It turns out that everything I try to say to you comes out wrong and never comes out right. So I say, "Why don't you and I get together? Take on the world and be together forever? Heads we will, tails we'll try again." So I say, "Why don't you and I get together? Fly to the moon, and straight on to heaven? Cos without you, they're never gonna let me in."_

We pulled apart, both of us breathing heavily. I tapped Aaron's nose. "You planned this, didn't you?" I smiled at him, and he grinned sheepishly back.

"Yeah, maybe. I hoped that you'd say yes."

"Why wouldn't I?" I asked as the song faded into silence. He was quiet for a moment.

"I dunno. I just really hoped you wouldn't say no." I kissed him softly.

"Of course I said yes. I love you, silly." He grinned back at me.

"I'd sure hope so."

"You don't have to hope."

He replied to that with another chaste kiss. "C'mon, let's go home," he said, hopping down off the bridge and holding his arms open. I sat down and hopped off, crashing into Aaron somewhat, but managing not to knock us over like the last time I had attempted to get off the bridge. "Wow, you didn't fall on your face."

I smacked his butt and then grinned, grabbing his hand and tugging on it. "Come on! I wanna get home so we can do it."

Aaron laughed loudly. "You're so strange." I stuck my tongue out at him.

"You love me anyways."

"That I do."

We walked hand-in-hand to the car, and when we got inside of it, I grabbed ahold of Aaron's hand again. He gave me a look of confusion.

"Really, what is with you and my hands?" I snorted.

"As I've told you before, they can do some magical, magical things." Aaron just rolled his eyes and started the car.

As he made a slow U-turn, I shouted, "DRIVE MAN, DRIVE!" He jumped and hit the brakes, and turned to look at me incredulously.

"Is someone a little in the mood?" I glared.

"More than a little! NOW DRIVE!"

Aaron hit the gas, and we sped out onto the back road the led to the highway.

I held my right hand out in front of me, and wiggled my fingers, watching the diamond in my ring sparkle in the waning sunlight. I jumped slightly as Aaron's voice broke the silence.

"You like it?"

I spun it around my finger. "It's beautiful."

"Not as beautiful as you, though," Aaron said, and I smiled.

"I still say you're delusional."

"Oh, shut up," he grumbled, and I laced my fingers through his own and squeezed.

"If I say I'm pretty just once will that make you happy?" I asked, resting my head on his shoulder as he headed for home.

"Yes," he said. "But why does it have to be only once? Why can't you say it all the time?"

"Because then I'd sound like a conceited bitch," I pointed out.

"Well, not to me." I smiled.

"You're too sweet for your own good, you know that?"

"Meh," he replied.

"Okay, fine. I'm pretty."

Aaron didn't answer, but instead turned onto our street. I sat up straight in my seat, and Aaron chuckled at me.

"Someone's a little feisty."

"Yes. Yes she is. Now park the damn car," I growled as Aaron pulled into the driveway. He turned off the car, and I immediately opened the car door and headed off towards the house. I could hear Aaron laughing behind me as he shut his car door.

When he finally got into the house, I tackled him to the couch, and began tugging at his shirt.

I'm just going to say that it was a very fun, and a very loud night. I'm also going to say that I am glad that Jessi didn't come back that night, or things would have gotten very awkward.


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter Twenty Eight **

I was woken up by a pair of hands that were running through my hair and then trailing down my bare back lightly. I opened my eyes slightly, and could tell by the little amount of light that was filtering through the window inside my bedroom that it was probably not even eight in the morning yet. I made a small noise as I stretched my legs, which had been entertwined around Aaron's.

"Did I wake you?" Aaron asked, and I could feel his voice rumbling in his chest.

"Nuhuh," I mumbled, stretching my arm out a bit, and then draping it back across Aaron's bare stomach. I could feel the muscles in his abdomen contract slightly. I smiled sleepily.

"You gonna go back to sleep?" He moved a few pieces of hair that were covering my face over my shoulder. I nodded, and yawned, and Aaron chuckled. "Go back to sleep. I'll still be here when you wake up."

"You better be," I mumbled, already on the edge of slipping into dreamland. He chuckled again, and ran his fingers through my hair slowly.

"I will be," he replied softly, and I could feel myself beginning to drift off.

Within no time, I was asleep once more.

* * *

The second time I woke up, I could hear Aaron's steady, even breaths in his chest, which meant he was asleep. I yawned widely and glanced over at my purple alarm clock. The bright red LED light read 10:46 AM.

I honestly did not want to leave the spot that I was in, because Aaron was so warm, and I knew that the second I stepped out of bed, I would get cold. This probably had to do with the fact that I wasn't wearing any clothes at all. But, sadly, I knew I had to get out of bed and take a shower sooner or later. I'd prefer later, but considering the activities I partook in last night, I should probably clean myself off sooner than later.

I untangled my legs from Aaron's, and slid off the bed, making sure I didn't wake him up. I could hear his small groan of protest as I left the bed, and I stifled a giggle.

When I got into the bathroom, I turned on the hot water and stepped under the jet that was spraying out of the shower head, and shivered.

About ten minutes later, I stepped out of the shower and wrapped my favorite black towel around me. I turned around looking for my clothes.

"Shit," I muttered, realizing I didn't grab any.

I left the bathroom and tip-toed into my room, and jumped about a foot in the air when Aaron wolf-whistled from behind me. One of the sides of the towel that I was holding had also slipped through my fingers, and I grabbed it as quick as I could and turn around, my face bright red.

"Aaron!" I squealed, throwing a bra at him and laughing when it hit him in the face. "I thought you were still asleep."

"Well, I was," he said, picking my bra up off his bare chest and tossing it on the floor, "but when the shower started, I woke up.. Well, and when you left the bed."

I blushed. "Sorry."

"It's almost eleven so I figure I should probably be up by now, don't you think?" Aaron replied, laughing.

"No, not often."

"What?"

"You said, "Don't you think?" and I said, "Not often." Get it now?" I snickered as I turned around, my towel clutched tightly in my left hand, and began searching through my top drawer for a pair of panties and a bra. I couldn't help but notice my engagement ring that was sparkling on my fourth finger in the quickly growing sunlight that was flowing into the room. I smiled.

"You know, the view from over here is _extremely_ nice," Aaron piped up from the bed. I just rolled my eyes and grabbed my red plaid and black lace bra. I held it up and asked without turning around,

"Hey, Aaron, do you like this bra?"

He was silent for a moment before answering, "I'd like it better if I could see you in it."

I dug around for a moment to find the matching panties. When I found them, I held them up, too. "How about these?"

"Once again, I'd like them better if I could see you in them."

"Well, then," I said, pushing my drawer shut with my elbow. I grabbed the ends of my towel with my teeth, and slid my panties on underneath it.

"Aw, not fair," Aaron protested with a smirk on his face. I dropped my towel and then proceeded to put my bra on. "Okay, never mind." I rolled my eyes. "Hey, will you toss me a pair of boxers?"

I grabbed a pair of navy blue boxers and chucked them over my shoulder.

"Of course. Navy blue." Aaron then coughed something that sounded oddly like "fetish," and I turned around and stuck my tongue out at him.

"You asked me to get you a pair. You should have expected it," I pointed out as I looked for something to wear.

"..True."

I just rolled my eyes once more and pulled out a purple tanktop and a pair of black shorts and put them on. When I turned around, Aaron was standing there in navy blue boxers and a white t-shirt. I glared. "You're teasing me."

He laughed. "Maybe.. Hey, it's not _my_ fault you have a navy blue boxers and white t-shirt fetish, now, is it?" I glared even harder.

"Well, that fetish hadn't really surfaced until _you_ showed up," I muttered, adjusting my tanktop.

"Oh, wonderful. I'm the cause of a fetish. I don't know whether to be scared, insulted, or complimented by that," Aaron said, smirking as I stuck my tongue out at him. He looked me up and down. "Now I'm not the only one who's teasing. I rolled my eyes and rubbed my still-damp hair with the discarded towel that was on the floor.

"Not my fault you find a pair of black shorts tempting." I dropped my towel as Aaron wrapped his arms around my waist, and whispered in my ear,

"I find _everything_ about you tempting." I shivered. "The way you walk.. The way you talk.. The way you giggle.. The way you shiver when I'm driving you crazy.." He slid his hands up my sides, and took my tanktop with it, so that my tummy was bare and it looked like I was wearing a sports bra. "I even find the way you roll your eyes at me tempting." He brushed his lips along my neck, and I closed my eyes. "But you wanna know what drives me _crazy_?" I didn't answer. Okay, I _couldn't_ answer - I couldn't get my brain to make words form.

He traced the outline of my hips with the tips of his fingers. "The look on your face when.." He trailed off suggestively, and I blushed.

"How's about we go downstairs before I'm in need of a second shower?" I recommended, turning my head and kissing Aaron's cheek.

"But that isn't nessicarilly a _bad_ thing," he protested, tracing the lines of my hips again.

"Aaron.." I warned, draping my arm back over his shoulder like in the scene from _Titanic_ where Jack and Rose kiss for the first time. I kissed his cheek once more. "Let's go to the mall or something. I need some stuff."

"Stuff?" Aaron asked.

"Yes, stuff. And I have money for the _stuff_, and if we get hungry, I have some money for that too." I pulled out of Aaron's grip and walked across the hall to the bathroom and began to brush my hair.

"Well," Aaron called from our room, "you don't have to pay for _everything_." I could hear him digging around in a drawer for something. Pants, hopefully.

"Oh, bleh," I replied, pulling my hair up into a ponytail. Aaron showed up in the mirror behind me, now with white basketball shorts on that reached a little past his knees. I growled. "Must you look good in _everything _you put on?"

"Must _you_?" he quipped, smacking my bottom. I jumped.

"Rape," I squeaked, and Aaron laughed, hopping onto the counter next to me as I began to apply eyeliner.  
"It's not rape if you enjoy it." I rolled my eyes and pulled out my bottle of concealer.

"What's that? It looks like skin colored nail polish." He had one eyebrow raised.

"You know," I said, pouring some into my hand and mixing it with some vanilla-scented lotion, "that's what I thought it was when I was little."

"Well, the bottle sure looks like it," he said, picking it up and turning it over in his hands. "_Concealer_. What're you trying to conceal?"

If I gave him the answer that was longing to leap off my tongue, he'd get all pissy, and I didn't really want that just this moment. "My face," I replied nonchalantly, dabbing concealer on my face and blending it in.

"Well, then you shouldn't use it because I love your face. It's another one of those temptations." He gave a wide, lopsided grin.

I ignored him and put on some mascara. When I finished, i turned to Aaron and asked, "Do I look okay?" He hopped off the counter and kissed my nose.

"You look much more than _okay_. You look gorgeous." I smiled. "And you smell like vanilla." I rolled my eyes with a grin on my face.

"You're too kind." He followed me out of the bathroom and back into our room, where I began looking for my wallet.

"This is a nice view.." he said from behind me as I bent down to grab my wallet, which had managed to creep its way under my bed. I pulled a wad of cash out of it, and then chucked it at Aaron. I then proceeded to slip said wad of cash into my bra. Aaron whistled, and I poked him in the stomach as I walked by, and headed downstairs, making sure not to trip and land on my face. I slipped on my black flipflops and grabbed Aaron's car keys.

"Come on, Aaron! I haven't got all day!"

He flipped me off as he came downstairs. I threw his white Vans at him and headed into the kitchen to grab my camera.

"Okay, we're ready," I said, walking into the living room, where Aaron was currently bent over, tying his shoe. I put my right hand on my hip and cocked my head. "Well.. This is a _very_ nice view." Aaron stood back up and stuck his tongue out at me. I just handed him my camera, which he slipped into his pocket.

We headed out into the bright sunlight, and I got into the driver's side of the car.

"Hey!"

"Hay is for horses, not people, Aaron," I retorted, smirking. "Now get in."

He muttered something about "my car" and got in grudgingly.

The drive to the mall was filled with bickering, music, and poking. Mostly just bickering though.

Aaron jumped when his phone started talking. "_Ring.. Ring.. Bitch alert. There is a bitch on the other side of this phone. Do _not_ pick it up._" I eyed his pocket warily.

"And who is that?" I asked as he pulled out his phone and answered the call.

"Hi, Jessi." I burst into hysterics.

"Aaron, you're so _mean_!"

"No, I didn't poke her," Aaron muttered into the phone. "Cos she's driving.. Yes, my car. She stole it."

"I did not!" I shouted at the phone, and Aaron leaned away from me as we pulled into the mall parking lot.

"Don't believe her. She's a compulsive - GAH!" I poked Aaron in the side repeatedly as I parked the car with one hand. "No, Jessi, stop hyperventilating. She didn't crash the car." I glared at him. "She poked me."

"Damn right, I did, and he deserved it." I turned off the car. "Say bye bye Aaron."

He glared at me with hatred. I smiled back sweetly. "We're at the mall now so I'll talk to you when I do."

"Real smooth," I said as he flipped the phone closed and stuffed it back in his pocket.

We bickered all the way into the mall. I swear, we already sounded like a married couple.

The second we stepped into the atrium, a group of about six guys stopped and looked me up and down. One of them whistled, and I turned bright red. I leaned over and whispered to Aaron, "Maybe I shouldn't have worn these shorts.." Aaron Wrapped his arm around my waist and kissed the top of my head.

"Come on." We headed for HotTopic so I could look for some new bras. Aaron definitely lucked out on the fact that the music sampler is directly in front of the dressing room.

I found two bras that I really liked, and I think Aaron liked them even more than I did.

We walked around hand-in-hand until about 12:30, and then we got a pretzel and sat down at a table by the fountain. Okay, _Aaron_ sat at the table. I sat on _Aaron_.

"Must you tease me?" he muttered as I pulled a chunk off the pretzel. I turned a little on Aaron's lap and I heard him groan. Giggling, I said,

"Open wiiiiide!"

Aaron opened his mouth, and I put the end of the pretzel in his mouth, and put the other end of it in my mouth. We pulled a _Lady and the Tramp_ and bit down at the same time, thus causing us to kiss. I pulled away giggling.

Aaron wrapped his arms around my waist and squeezed, bringing me closer to him. "You're so corny."

I giggled. "You love me anyway."

"Definitely." I reached into Aaron's pocket, and he said, "Whoa, whoa, whoa, not in public." I elbowed him and pulled out my camera.

"Say _I love you_!" I chirruped and held the camera out in front of us.

"I love you," he murmured, and turned my head so that I was facing him, and kissed me. I snapped the picture. I turned the camera around and looked at the picture.

"Aww. We're so cute." Aaron chuckled and ripped off another piece of the pretzel and held it out in front of me. I took it from his fingers with my mouth. "Oh, and now you're feeding me. How exquisite."

"You're still corny."

"You still love me."

"I doubt I ever won't," he said, and I grinned.

"You mean that?"

"Of course I do. Why would I say it if I didn't mean it?" I trailed my fingers over his hands.

"I dunno."

"Well, I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it, and obviously, I said it, so I obviously mean it." He kissed my shoulder.

Aaron's phone started saying the whole _bitch alert_ get-up, and he had to reach under me to get his phone. I squealed.

"Hello?" he said into the phone. I spaced out and began to twirl the ring on my finger in circles again. I honestly couldn't believe I was engaged.

Aaron closed his phone. "What'd Jessi want?" I asked.

"I honestly don't remember," he muttered. "You done?"

I nodded. I didn't have much of an appetite. I hopped off Aaron's lap and grabbed my bag that had the bras in it, and grabbed Aaron's hand.

As we started heading towards Target when I noticed Courtney Williams. She had teased me mercilessly until about ninth grade. Ninth grade was when I threatened to stab her. She _also_ happened to be one of Aaron's ex-girlfriends. I started to pull Aaron into FYE movies, but she saw us.

"Oh, look who it is. The emo slut and the player," she squealed, clip-clopping over to us. I cursed quietly under my breath, and Aaron's face arranged itself into an un-readable mask.

"What do you want?" he asked frostily.

"Oh, my, no need to get hostile." She flipped her blonde hair over her shoulder.

"Seriously, what do you want?" Aaron repeated, wrapping his arm around me. I wrapped my arms around his torso and purposely let the diamond on my finger show.

"Oh, wow, you're engaged?" She gave it a scrutinizing look. "But it's so _tiny_."

"Courtney, honestly, go fuck yourself," I snapped.

She rolled her eyes. "How much did she pay you to give her that diamond? Or, better yet, what'd she threaten to do to you?" I growled and narrowed my eyes. Aaron tightened his grip on my waist.

"She didn't _threaten_ or _pay_ me." Aaron's voice was so calm that it was frightening. "She, unlike you, is an amazing person, and I love her. I only dated you because they said you were a good fuck, and you know what? You can't even do that right."

Courtney gave a small "hmph!" flicked her hair over her shoulder, and stalked away, her Jimmy Choo heels clickity-clacking the whole way.

"You okay?" Aaron asked me, releasing his death-grip on my waist and kissing my forehead.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I pinched the bridge of my nose between my thumb and my middle finger, and breathed deeply.

"You sure?"

"Yeah, give me a minute." Aaron stopped asking me if I was alright, but he rubbed my back. I sighed deeply. "Okay, I'm good. Jeez, you grip hard when you're pissed off." I lifted the corner of my tank top. Sure enough, there were four pink marks where Aaron's fingers had been. "I think that's gonna bruise, but, then again, I bruise easily."

"Shit," he said, looking extremely guilty. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay. It didn't hurt."

"No it isn't. I hurt you. I -" I put my finger on his lips and he ceased talking.

"It's _fine_, Aaron. It's not like you meant to." I replaced my finger with my lips. "C'mon." I closed my hand around his and pulled him into _Target_.

Halfway down the aisle, I asked Aaron, "Did you actually sleep with that bimbo?" He was silent for a moment.

"Does it count if I was so drunk that I don't even really remember it?" I considered that for a moment.

"No, not really. I know from personal experience that alcohol can cause one to do things that they probably never would." Aaron laughed. "Hey, will you grab me that basket? I need to get some stuff." Aaron grabbed a bright red basket from the stand and handed it to me. I immediately dragged him into the _personal feminine items_ aisle.

"Must you drag me here? I really do not need to see what kind of tampons my girlfriend buys."

"Oh, yes, you do. If you're gonna be my husband, you need to know what kind to buy me." He halted in the middle of the aisle, and I nearly fell on my face as my hand yanked out of his.

"I have to buy you _tampons_? You never said that was part of the deal." I laughed.

"Aaron, they can't hurt you." He glared at the box of Tampax that I had picked up.

"Yes.. They can." I waved them in his face. "Stop it." I began laughing so hard that my sides hurt. "Shut up." I looked at him, and thankfully, he was grinning. "Fine, I'll buy you tampons as long as it's not every time."

I stood on my tippy toes and kissed him, and then dropped the box into the basket. "Fine. Eleven months out of twelve." He glared, and I just laughed.

After getting something for dinner, some makeup, and some batteries, we headed for the car. This time, Aaron got into the driver's side before I could blink. I got in the passenger side and just rolled my eyes at him.

The drive home was quiet, but peaceful.

When we got home, Aaron and I lay down on the couch together, and within five minutes of my head landing on Aaron's chest, I was asleep.


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter 29**

Over the next few days, Aaron and I had the greatest time together. We spent what seemed like every waking moment with each other, and I wasn't complaining. When we told Jessi about Aaron proposing and me saying yes, and when I showed her the ring, she hugged Aaron and I so hard that I thought I was going to explode. For a small thing, she is extremely powerful.

It was the night before Aaron was destined to go to a different rehab, and I was currently standing in front of the mirror and cursing at my stupid reflection. Aaron wasn't currently home. He was out getting us dinner, and I was standing in front of the long mirror in the bathroom wearing only a bra and a pair of panties. I had just gotten out of the shower.

I turned so that I could see my side, and ran my hands over my stomach, and pinched the layer that shouldn't be there. "Ugh." I looked like shit. "Why can't you be pretty?" I asked my reflection, as if I was expecting it to answer. I sighed and walked out of the bathroom and into my room.

I grabbed one of Aaron's black shirts off the dresser. It smelled like a mix of Axe, ck1, and just.. _Aaron_. I slipped it on, and then slid a pair of my mini-boxer-brief shorts and then headed downstairs.

I sat down on the couch and wrapped my arms around a pillow, resting my chin on it, and then turned on the TV.

Maybe not even two minutes later, Aaron burst into the livingroom with a large bag of McDonalds in his hands.

I leaned back over the arm of the couch, and Aaron's shirt rode up so far that it covered my face. I pulled it back down to my waist and asked, "What'd you get me?"

Instead of answering, he asked, "Is that my shirt?"

I grinned and put my hands on the floor undernath me, and pushed off the couch with my feet, and succeeded in doing a sort-of backwards handstand thing."Not anymore, it isn't."

"But I like that shirt," he protested, kicking off his shoes. I grabbed the McDonalds bag from him and headed into the kitchen.

"Yeah, well, so do I. It smells _really_ good." I pulled out two BigMacs, two large fries, and two Dr. Peppers.

"So you're saying I smell good?" I rolled my eyes as Aaron sat down at the table and pulled his food over to him. "Are you?" he repeated.

"God, yes. You smell amazing," I answered. He smirked and I stole a french fry from him as I walked by. He slapped my ass, and I squeaked.

"That's what you get." His eyes widened when he realized what he said, and then he covered his ears right before I belted out,

"THAT'S WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU LET YOUR HEART WIN! WHOA OH!"

and dance in a little circle.

"Please _never_ do that in public," he muttered, stuffing two fries in his mouth.

"I can't promise anything.." He threw a fry at me.

The rest of the meal contained flying french fries, and, as per usual, bickering.

We headed upstairs after dinner, and when we got into our room, I tackled Aaron to the bed.

"Well, _someone_ sure is fiesty," Aaron laughed, placing his hands on my hips as I straddled his waist.

"Maybe.. But hey, I had fun in the shower." I winked. "_Loud_ fun." Aaron swallowed hard, and I smirked.

"And you didn't wait for me?" he asked, his face full of mock sadness.

"Nah. I couldn't wait any longer." He swallowed again. And then, without any warning, he rolled us over, and pushed me into the pillows. "Well, well, well.. What was that you were saying about people being fiesty?"

"You know.. I think I can _show_ you better than I can _tell_ you," he murmured, and then pressed his lips to mine. I reacted immediately, and tilted my head so that I could take the kiss deeper as soon as possible.

We parted for air, but only for a second, and then our lips were together once more, and it felt like every part of my body was on fire. Before I even parted my lips, Aaron had moved onto kissing my neck, and I closed my eyes.

He kissed around my collarbone and chuckled at the shiver that ran through my body. I tugged at his shirt a little, and he sat up just long enough to pull off his shirt, and then he pulled me into a sitting position, and tugged his shirt off of me. Pushing me back into the pillows, Aaron reached behind me and fiddled with my bra clasp while I trailed light kisses down his neck and over his shoulder. He finally got it unhooked, and I pulled the straps down over my shoulders and chucked it across the room, and kissed Aaron's neck a few times before he managed to escape my grip and begin kissing down my chest. I arched my back and bit my lip softly, trying not to moan.

Aaron grinned up at me from where he was with his lips on my body, and then hooked his fingers into my shorts, and pulled them down. I reached down and unbuttoned his jeans and yanked them off. Aaron kissed my stomach and slid his hands up and down my sides, and I shivered and arched my back again. He dragged my panties down over my legs and then tossed them onto the floor. I could feel his lips smiling against my stomach as I tugged at his boxers, but didn't get them pulled down much.

He rubbed my thighs as I trailed my hands lightly down his back, and then, once again without warning, he flipped us over so that he was sitting up, and I was sitting on top of him. I grinned, and began to kiss his neck again, trailing my fingertips down his chest.

Aaron grabbed my waist, and rocked me back and forth slowly. I bit my lip, trying not to moan, but that was a lost cause, for Aaron then rocked me harder, and I couldn't keep quiet any longer. He slid his hands up my sides, and cupped my boobs, and then kissed my neck. I moaned loudly, and then bit my lip again.

I lifted off Aaron's lap, and then yanked his boxers off. He slowly lowered me back down onto the bed, and slid his hands up my legs. I trailed my fingers along his hips, and arched my back slightly as he rubbed my inner thighs. I knew what was coming next.

Aaron slipped two fingers into me, and I dug my fingers into his shoulder. "Oh, _Jesus_." He chuckled and kissed my neck, continuing to slide his fingers in and out, steadily growing speed.

* * *

The next morning, Aaron and Jessi left a little before 12:30, and it was, once again, a very depressing goodbye.

I went upstairs to try and find my only nice pair of jeans for work.

My boss, Cody, had let me off for a few weeks after I had explained the whole drug thing. He happened to be an ex-addict, so he understood and thankfully let me take a slight vacation, but today was the first day I went back to work. Funny how that stuff works out, hm?

I finally found my jeans underneath a clothes basket, and hurriedly pulled them on.

When I got downstairs, I grabbed Aaron's keys off the counter, and headed out the door.

Work was really slow. We had almost no customers.

"So, how're things going?" Cody, my boss, asked during a point when absolutely nobody was in the HandiMart.

"Pretty good," I replied, sitting down on a stool and spinning around in a circle on it.

"That's good.." He popped a few TicTacs in his mouth. "How're you and Aaron doing?"

"Oh, we're doing great." I twirled my engagement ring around on my finger. "He proposed to me on my birthday." I held my hand out in front of his face, and he grabbed my hand.

"Wooow, that's gorgeous. Looks to be at least a third of a karat." Cody realized he was still holding my hand, and he let it go. I coughed slightly, and jumped when the bell over the door rang, signaling that someone had entered, reminding me that I was actually at work.

When my shift ended, Cody waved and smiled at me, and I smiled back, a little confused. The drive home seemed faster than usual, and when I got home, it was starting to sprinkle outside.

I opened the front door, and found Jessi attempting to play _Misery Business_ on Guitar Hero: World Tour.

"And how's that working out for ya?" I asked, taking my shoes off. She missed four notes.

"Not so well, thank you." I sat down next to Jessi on the couch, and watched her fail miserably at playing this game. I snickered. "Okay, you wanna prove that you're better at this?" She thrust the guitar at me.

"Yes. Yes I do." I went back and set it to _Medium_ instead of _Easy_, and said, "Watch and learn, Jessica. Watch. And. Learn." I hit every single note. "Whoa, I never meant to brag, but I got him where I want him now! Whoa, it was never my intention to brag, to steal it all away from you now! But God, does it feel so good, cos I got him where I want him now! And if you could, then you know you would, cos God, it just feels so.. It just feels _so_ good."

When I finished with a perfect score, Jessi stuck her tongue out at me and hit me upside the head. "What was that for?" I muttered.

"Because you suck."

"No, my dear, _you_ suck." I grinned, and she rolled her eyes.

"So, how was work today?"

I was silent for a moment. "It was.. slow.. and strange." She quirked an eyebrow. "You know my boss, Cody?"

"The good looking twenty-five-something year old?"

"Yes.. Him."

"What about him?"

"..I think he was coming onto me." Her eyes widened.

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, it was kinda weird. When I showed him my ring, he held my hand, and then seemed to realize he was still holding it a minute or something later." My eyebrow twitched.

"..Wooow."

"Yeah.. So.. How was the drive?" I asked, referring to the drive to the next rehab Aaron was going to.

"It was mostly silent, and slightly awkward. He didn't want to go, obviously, but he knows he has to." I sighed and covered my eyes. "He'll be back before you know it, hon."

"Yeah, I guess.." I sighed. "I'm gonna go take a nap."

"Okay."

I trudged upstairs and collapsed on the bed. I closed my eyes, and waited for sleep to cover me in a warm blanket.


	30. Chapter 30

**Chapter 30**

The next few weeks passed in the same way. Wake, shower, dress, work, get hit on by Cody, go home, do whatever with Jessica, eat, sleep, and then repeat. It was very tiring, and I seemed to be gaining a very small amount of weight, even though I wasn't eating on any regular pattern.

Today was Aaron's birthday, and I had already called the rehab center to ask if I could come see him on such short notice, and maybe bring him a small present. I hated to have to ask, but I know that some centers don't allow outside gifts that may conceal drugs, alcohol, and other things that are strictly prohibited.

I was currently digging through my closet, trying to find something to wear. I decided I oughta look nice, considering it was Aaron's eighteenth birthday, and all. And, after throwing more than half my closet into various places in my room, I finally settled on my thigh-length black and grey layered tank tops, and a pair of black jean shorts. I decided I couldn't do anything about my face, and pulled my hair into a ponytail, and slid on a pair of worn black flip flops.

I headed downstairs — tripping only twice — and grabbed my camera, Aaron's present, and his car keys, and then stepped out the front door into the blinding heat and sunlight.

The ride to the center was very slow, and I was extremely shaky and jumpy the whole time because I was nervous to see Aaron. His present was on the passenger's seat next to me. I would have brought Jessi's present, but I expected a CD wouldn't do him much good until he was back home. Instead, she told me to tell him that she sends her love.

When I pulled up into the parking lot, I drummed my fingers on the steering wheel. "Caitlin, calm down," I said into the rear-view mirror. "It's just _Aaron_. Just because you haven't seen him for a month and six days, doesn't mean he isn't still _Aaron_." I took a deep breath, pocketed my camera, grabbed Aaron's present, and stepped out into the sun.

I pulled open the large glass door, and was hit by a blast of cool air that sent goosebumps up and down my arms and legs. I looked around. It was very homey and .. expensive looking inside. I vaguely wondered how Jessi managed to get Aaron into some place this nice. I shuffled towards the front desk, where a lanky boy with shaggy blonde hair stood, gazing at passerby with a blank look in his eyes, which appeared to be a bright turquoise. But, as per usual, I stumbled over air less than five feet from the desk and crashed into it, winding up with my face a mere two inches away from the boy with blonde hair. Aaron's present clattered to the floor.

"Hello," the boy said with a British accent, putting his finger on my forehead and pushing my face about a foot away from his. "I'm Chris."

"I'm so sorry," I said, mortified. I bent down to get Aaron's present, and when I popped back up, I hit my head on the small ledge of the desk. "Shit." Chris leaned over the top of the desk.

"Are you okay?"

I stood back up, stumbling slightly. "Uhm, yeah. I'm Caitlin." I blinked a few times, waiting for the black to fade from my sight.

"Hey," Chris said from somewhere in front of me. "Are you _sure_ you're okay?"

I blinked a couple more times, and my vision had returned to normal. "Yeah, I'm fine. I have a really hard head and pretty much no grace at all." Chris' eyes were filled with laughter, and I could see his lips twitching.

"So, what brings you here this hot July day?" he questioned, leaning on his elbow nonchalantly.

"Here to visit someone." I pushed my camera deeper into my pocket.

"Well, anyone having _you_ as a guest should be _very_ lucky." Chris winked, and I felt my cheeks grow warm.

I brushed a stray hair back behind my left ear, and I could feel Chris' eyes graze the array of scars crisscrossing there. "Uh, yeah.. I'm here to see Aaron Sanchezz."

"Aha, Aaron. That guy hates me." I blinked in surprise.

"What'd you do?"

"Eh, little of this, little of that." He waved his hand in the air like it was no big deal. "Told me to stay the fuck away from him and all that jazz."

"Heh.." I coughed. "So.. Could you.. or someone else.. show.. lead.. take.. whatever.. me to where Aaron is?"

"I shall do the honors." He walked around the desk, and then called over his shoulder, "Melissa, watch the counter for me. I got some.. uh, _business_ to attend to." He winked at me, and I blushed again.

"Eh, stuff it," Melissa replied with a British lilt, taking Chris' place at the desk.

Chris led the way through the lobby and down a hall to an elevator. "So, tell me about yourself. Age? Relation to Aaron? Favorite flower?"

"Eh?"

"Answer the questions." We stepped into the elevator, and the doors closed.

"Uh, I just turned seventeen in June.. My favorite flower is a rose.. And I'm engaged to Aaron." He choked for a second, and then asked, coughing,

"Engaged?"

"Yeah. He popped the question on my birthday."

"Damn," Chris muttered. "He is one _lucky_ guy."

I blushed for the third time when the elevator bell chimed, and the doors opened.

"After you," Chris said with a sweep of his hand. I walked out in front of him and, I heard him cough lightly. I wondered how Aaron would take to Chris all but delivering me to him.

We stopped at room 267, and Chris knocked on the door. Aaron opened the door a crack. "What do _you_ want?"

Chris grabbed my arm and pulled me next to him. "Look who almost crashed into me in the lobby!"

Aaron blinked in surprise, and I then launched myself at him and wrapped my arms around his neck, which left me dangling at least five inches off the floor. Aaron wrapped his arms around me.

"Well, I'll leave you two love birds alone," Chris said, and then headed back towards the elevators.

Aaron set me down and closed the door behind him. "Well, this sure is a surprise."

"Happy birthday!" I grinned. "Jeez, you're old." He laughed and grabbed my hand, leading me out onto his balcony. I will admit that I was slightly in awe that he had a _balcony_. Would they be scared he'd throw himself off it or something?

I tried to sit in the chair across from Aaron's, but he grabbed my hand again and pulled me into his lap. I giggled and rested my head back against his shoulder. "I missed you." He brushed his thumbs over the tops of my hands.

"I missed you too, babe." He kissed my temple.

"Jessi's sorry she couldn't come. She had to work. Oh, and she says that she sends her love, because her present probably wouldn't do you any good here."

"Typical Jessi." He sighed. "But tell her thanks and that I love her too."

"Will do." I twirled Aaron's present in my hands.

"So, what'd you get me?" I laughed and placed the parcel in his hands.

"Sorry if one of them is too girly or whatever." Aaron pulled the wrapping paper off the box and opened it. Inside was a smaller box and a picture inside a pewter picture frame. Aaron picked it up.

It was the picture of Aaron and I on the steps in front of the school, grinning into the camera. The top part of the frame had "Te quiero más que ayer" carved into it, and the bottom part had "pero no tanto como mañana" carved into it. "Is it too chickish?" I asked, sincerely hoping it wasn't.

"No. You look pretty." I smiled. "It's a good picture of you." He kissed my cheek and then picked up the smaller box. "And what's this?"

"Well, open it, silly."

Aaron opened the box, and inside sat a black watch.

"To make up for the picture if you didn't like it," I explained and Aaron kissed my cheek again.

"Thank you. But now I feel bad."

"Why?" I asked. "You got me a nearly half karat _diamond_ for my birthday, Aaron."

"I guess." He patted my tummy, and I giggled. "So, how are you and Jessi doing?"

I exhaled out my nose. "We're both doing okay, but we miss you a lot."

"I'm sorry."

"It isn't your fault," I said, kissing under his jaw.

"How is it not?" he asked, playing with the bottom of my shirt.

"I mean, at least you're _trying_ to stop and get better. And I know how addicting some things can be." I sighed.

"Yeah, I know you do." He rested his head against mine. "You haven't cut again, have you?"

I held out both my arms, palm up, and said, "Nope, I'm clean.. Well, as clean as I'll ever _be_."

Aaron intertwined his fingers with mine, and raised them to his lips, and proceeded to kiss the tips of all ten of my fingers. I smiled.

"I love you so much."

"I love you too."

"How much?" I asked with a smile on my face. "On a scale of one to ten?"

I could practically hear his eyes roll. "One million." A big, goofy grin broke out on my face.

"Yeah? Well, I love you more."

"No, you don't," Aaron replied.

"Yes, I do."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes," I declared firmly.

"No," Aaron said back, and covered my mouth with his hand. "I love you more, and that's final." I licked his hand, and he jumped, and then wiped it on the chair. "Why must you always do that?"

I licked my lips. "Because you taste good." He laughed.

"How's Jessica?"

"Wow, _Jessica_?"

"What? That's her name."

"But I've never heard you call her _Jessica_ before," I pointed out.

"Fine. How is _Jessi_?"

"She's about five months pregnant.. And she looks about _seven_ months pregnant."

"Damn. Really?"

"Yeah. She also got all emotional this morning," I said, playing with Aaron's fingers like I always do when I sit on his lap.

"About?" he asked.

"You," I murmured.

"What about me?"

"She went all, "He isn't my little brother anymore, now that he's eighteen. I'm gonna miss it." and then she looked like she was going to cry."

He sighed. "It's not like I died or anything. I just turned one year older."

"I know. That's what I said. I told her that you're still her little — and I use the term _little_ very loosely — brother no matter what you do."

Aaron sighed again. "Why must girls be so emotional?"

"It's called hormones, bub. Deal with it." He laughed.

"When do you have to leave?" Aaron asked quietly.

"Twenty, thirty minutes maybe?" I replied as quiet, if not quieter than Aaron had. "Speaking of leaving.. Do you know yet when you're allowed to come back home?"

"They said September, maybe. Around the twentieth."

I grinned. "That's great!" My smile fell a little. "You won't be at school with me for like, a month."

"Yeah, I know." A light breeze started up, and then died down again. "I don't even _want_ to know how much make-up work I'm going to have."

"Everyone's gonna ask where you are. What do I tell them?"

"Good question." He paused. "Tell them I'm in.. I don't know, Iowa or something visiting family." I laughed.

"Fail."

"What?"

"Lame excuse."

"Do you have anything better?"

"..No."

"_Fail_."

"Shut up." I pulled out of Aaron's grip and turned around, and then climbed back on, causing me to straddle his waist.

"I like this position a _lot_ better," Aaron said, grinning and placing his hands on my hips. "What's this?" He dug his hand into my pocket and extracted my black camera. "You brought your camera? Typical."

I snatched it out of his hands. "Well, I wanted some more for the album.. and I was thinking ahead to the wedding.." I turned my camera over in my hands.

"You're already thinking about the wedding?" He sounded surprised.

"Well, we can legally get married in a year, when I turn eighteen, cos sure as hell my mom ain't ever coming back from Florida, and thank _God_ for that.. And it also takes a lot of planning for a wedding, you know?" I looked up at Aaron. He considered this for a moment.

"Yeah, true. But we both know we won't ever have enough money to get married in somewhere like Hawaii, right?" I nodded. "Well, what were you thinking about for it then?"

"I dunno.. Maybe we could go to the beach and have a sunset wedding."

"What were you gonna use the pictures for?"

"I make some pretty cool slide shows, and I could make a few and we could play them at the reception or something."

"That sounds like a good idea. But I get to help." He smiled. "Now, how's about we add more pictures to that album?" He took my camera out of my hands and held it up above us. "Smile!" Aaron said, and snapped the picture. And then, almost immediately after, pulled me into a kiss, and I heard the snap of my Nikon once more.

"Aaron, you're such a goof," I muttered, giggling. He kissed me on the cheek.

"You love me anyhow."

"That, I do," I quoted, tapping his nose. Aaron rolled his eyes and handed my camera back to me.

"Do you have to go now?" Aaron looked like he was ready to pout.

"Yes, sadly. I have work at.." I picked up Aaron's watch and glanced at the time. "Four.. and that's in a little more than a half an hour." I shuddered at the thought of getting hit on for two-plus hours.

"What's wrong?" Aaron asked.

"Oh, nothing." I twirled my camera around, and Aaron grabbed my chin and forced me to look at him.

"What's wrong?" he repeated, this time more firm.

I sighed. "You know my boss?" He nodded, his brow furrowing. "Well.."

"Well..?" he prompted.

"He is apparently attracted to me." The frown on Aaron's face became increasingly more prominent. "Don't freak out! He just flirts subtly — but not _too_ subtle, seeing as how I picked up on it immediately — and is overly nice, and stares.. just a bit.." I trailed off, looking anywhere but Aaron's face.

"And he's like, thirty _five_," Aaron added, anger apparent in his voice. I kissed his forehead and took the corners of his mouth and yanked them up into a smile. "Whut thh fook are choo doooing?" I giggled at how he was lisping.

"You look sexy when you smile," I chirped, grinning. He pulled my hands off of his face.

"I do?" He smirked. "I thought I was sexy all the time." I snorted, and he said, "I'm kidding."

"You may be kidding, but you're always sexy." Aaron rolled his eyes.

"Do you know how to get back down to the lobby?"

I considered this for a moment. "Uhm.. No, not really. Cos.. Chris didn't lead, I did.. And he told me where to turn, where to stop, all that stuff. I mean, I could probably find it, but I want you to take me downstairs." I climbed off his lap.

"Good." I could tell that he was happy for this, probably because Chris was still downstairs.

Aaron took my hand and led me back into his room, and then out into the hallway, making sure to shut the door behind him. "So," I started, "made any friends or met anyone you like at all yet?"

"Nah, not really." We passed a really pretty and a _really_ thin blonde girl, and she glared daggers at me, and then at my right hand, which was clenched in Aaron's. "..As you can see, some of the girls here are trying to worm their way into my pants." I frowned. "But, hey, I've told them at least a million times that I'm engaged and that it _isn't_ happening anytime soon." I grinned as we stepped into the elevator.

"You know, this is one more reason why I love you."

"What is?"

"I mean, most guys would jump at the chance to nail a bunch of girls without their girlfriends ever finding out."

"Well, you know I'm not like that," he replied, wrapping his arm around my waist just as the elevator doors opened.

I caught Chris' eye as we headed towards the large, glass double doors. He waved. I rolled my eyes, but winked at him before we headed out into the 96-degree day.

We stopped in front of the car, and Aaron turned me to face him, and placed his hands on my hips. "Promise me that you won't do anything stupid while I'm not with you." He brushed a strand of hair behind my ear, and then placed his hand back on my waist. I nodded. "And you promise not to let Jessi burn the house down?" I laughed and nodded again. "And promise you will save your lips for me until I'm back?"

"I definitely do," I murmured, standing up on my tip toes and pressing my lips to Aaron's. I swear, within two seconds, Aaron had turned the kiss into a French one.

I slid my hands up his chest and locked them around his neck. When we parted, I tapped his nose. "I gotta go to work, but I'll come see you again sometime soon."

"You promise?" Aaron pouted, and I kissed him again.

"I promise, babe."

"Okay, now, go to work before _he_ comes looking for you." I giggled, and kissed him once more.

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

I unwillingly let go of Aaron and he patted my ass as I pulled the car keys out of my pocket and opened the door. I rolled my eyes and climbed in.

"See you when I see you," I said, just before closing the door. I put the key in the ignition.

Just as I put the car into reverse, Aaron tapped on the window. I rolled it down. "Yes?"

He stuck his head in and kissed me one last time. "Love you."

"Love you more," I replied, and rolled up the window so he couldn't reply, and reversed out of the lot, and then pulled into the road.

In the rear view mirror, I could see Aaron disappearing through the glass doors.


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter Thirty One**

I parked the car in the Handimart parking lot and hurried inside. I was twelve minutes late.

Peeking around the display of cheap twelve-dollar sunglasses, I tiptoed over to the counter. And, just as I stowed my keys in the small cubby-hole underneath the counter, Cody chimed out of bloody nowhere,

"AHA!"

and I screamed bloody murder, and clutched my chest. I could feel my heart beating a million miles per second.

"Good _God_! Don't _do that_!" I shouted, now holding onto the counter. Cody just grinned.

"My, my, my.. Don't you just look ravishing today?"

"Thanks," I mumbled. "I figured I ought to look presentable for my _fiancé._"

He ignored my emphasis on fiancé, but instead proceeded to tell me I always looked presentable. I quirked an eyebrow.

"And how do you know this?" I tapped my fingernails — of which I was trying to grow out — on the red countertop.

"I mean, it's not as if you dress like _this_ —" he waved his hand at me "— every day."

I rolled my eyes."Are you just saying in a really nice way that you're stalking me?" I laughed, not sure if I should be scared, affronted, or embarrassed.

"No!" he said, dismissing it and making it sound like the dumbest thing I've ever said. "I've seen you at the grocery store in what I _think_ was your PJs." He smiled a dazzling smile that made me think of a random _Twilight_ quote.

Our slightly creepy banter was interrupted when none other than Jessica waddled in, her belly proceeding her into the depot.

"Aren't you supposed to be working, my lady?" I asked, pulling up my shorts and almost tripping over my flip flops.

"I'm on break, thank you." She looked from me to Cody, and quirked her left eyebrow, just as I had done. It was like she could _smell_ the awkward in the air. "And what happened _here_?"

"Oh, nothing," I muttered nonchalantly, and then sneezed.

She looked at Cody, and he grinned once more. "Are _you_ behaving?" Her eyes narrowed, but his smile didn't falter. Even though she was at _least_ eight years younger than him, she was a _lot_ scarier.

"What if I'm not?" he quipped, his green eyes twinkling mischeviously.

"Hell hath no scorn like a woman's fury," she quoted, waddling over to where the pizza resided in a little case. "Caiiiiitliiiin?" she called, dragging out the _i'_s.

"Coming, darling!" I tittered, scooching past Cody and twitching slightly as his hand brushed my backside.

I tripped once more before finally getting to the pizza counter. Jessi was staring longingly at a slice of sausage pizza. I laughed and unlocked the cabinet and handed it to her in exchange for a five-dollar bill.

"So," she said, after swallowing a mammoth-sized bite, "how's Aaron?"

"He's okay. He said you're a sap and he's only 18, not dead, by the way," I told her, pulling out a slice of supreme pizza and pausing for a second. "Brb."

"Did you just say brb?"

"Yes. Do you have a problem?" I said, rummaging around on the shelf for a small bottle of vinegar.

When I finally found one, I sat back down and unscrewed the bottle, and slightly covered the opening with my thumb and poured some on my pizza.

Jessi blinked. "What the.."

I bit into the pizza and sighed. "That's _so_ good."

Jessi put a hand to my forehead. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah.."

"Oookay.. So, did Aaron like his present..s..?"

"Surprisingly, yes. I didn't expect him to like the picture that much." I thought for a moment. "_Actually_, I didn't expect him to like it at _all_."

"Aaron has that side that he doesn't often let people see because he's.." she trailed off, not really knowing how to finish the sentence.

"Like, he's the jock in baggy jeans and a Hollywood Undead shirt with a hat and sneakers on, and he has that reputation or whatever it is to live up to," I said, explaining what I thought of Aaron before I ever talked to him. "He's secretive about his sweet side, but when he isn't secretive of it is when I like him the best."

Jessi pondered this for a moment while she finished her pizza. "I agree. I've always known him to be like, whatever that is, but he always has a shoulder for you to cry on." She sighed. "I kinda miss that, you know?"

I nodded. "I would have never known how.. perfectly imperfect he was, if you get what I mean." She nodded. "I love him more than words can describe. Hell, I don't even know _how_ to explain it without sounding redundant." Jessi laughed.

"I know what you mean, honey." I hiccupped, and Jessi stared at something behind me. "Your boss is cute, but kinda creepy at the same time."

I choked on my last bight of vinegar and supreme pizza. "He is. He was like, "You always look ravishing" after I told him I was dressed to be presentable for my fiancé, and then I asked how he knew this. His reply was, "I mean, it's not as if you dress like _this_ every day," and I asked if that was a really nice way to say he stalks me or something. Jessi's lip twitched as she tried to hold back laughter.

"And?"

"He said that he'd seen me at the grocery store in my PJs, which is possible. Midnight tampon runs, you know?" she laughed.

"Wow."

I crinkled my nose as a caramel-colored girl with dreadlocks walked by. Jessi cocked her head to the side with a "Whassamatter?" look on her face.

"Her perfume. I think I'm gonna be sick." I dashed to the bathroom just in time for my lunch to come back up.

When I got to the table, Jessica's eyes widened.

"Jesus, you look pale. And I didn't smell anything."

"I did. It smelled like brown sugar." I trudged up to Cody, of whom looked taken aback at my obviously pale face. "I need to go home. I'm sick."

"Yeah, that's fine. Don't worry about it."

"Thanks." Jessi came up behind me.

"You gonna be okay by yourself until I get off work?" I nodded. "You'll call me if anything happens?" I nodded again as I pushed open the door and left the air conditioned building. "I'll be home around 5:30. You want me to bring home anything for dinner?"

"A few orders of large MacDonalds fries would be nice.. and a vanilla milkshake." I smiled at jessi overtop the roof of Aaron's car. "You know, if it isn't too much trouble."

"No, it's fine. See you around 5:30," Jessi chimed, and climbed into her car. I climbed into my own and shifted into reverse and then headed down the street.

Reviewing the conversation I had just had with Jessi in my head, a sudden thought struck me as I remembered something I had said. Tampon runs..

..I was two weeks late.

I was _never_ late. Not _once_ in my life. "Oh!" I squeaked, and my left hand fell to my stomach.

Before I knew it, I had pulled into the driveway. I got out of the car and stumbled into the house and picked up the phone, my hand still on my stomach.

I dialed Jessica's number with a shaking hand. She answered on the second ring.

"Hello?"

"Jessi?" I said, my voice wavering.

"Caitlin? What's wrong?" Her voice immediately shifted into panic mode.

"Along with the fries and a milkshake.. could you bring me a few pregnancy tests?"

The other end of the line went silent.

"..Pregnancy test?" Jessi asked quietly.

"Yeah.. I have my suspicions. Just, please?" I sat down because my legs were shaking so badly.

"Okay. It's gonna be alright. I'll be home in an hour."

"Mmkay," I said distantly, and hung up.

I ran my fingers through my hair as I closed my eyes, trying to block out old memories.

I jumped and snapped out of my reverie as a car door slammed somewhere along the street.

I glanced over at the clock. It was 4:42, and that meant that Jessi would be home in less than an hour, or so she had said.

Deciding that I should be happy because I knew and was engaged to the father this time, I picked up a book and immersed myself in it.

* * *

The front door opened at exactly 5:25 and the first thing Jessi did was set down the MacDonalds and a small grocery bag that I expected held two or three tests, and hugged me to the best of her ability.

I sat down and pulled out three containers of large fries and what I presumed to be Jessi's salad.

"How ya holding up?" she asked, pulling her salad towards her and popping the top off of it.

"I've decided that I should be happy about this because it's not like last time."

Jessi blinked, her fork in mid air. "Last time?"

"Yeah.. I got pregnant when I was 12, but some kids pushed me down the stairs and I lost it." I stuffed a few fries into my mouth and sipped my vanilla milkshake.

"I'm sorry." I didn't look up, but instead I kept eating.

After a few minutes of silence, I said, "I just wonder what Aaron's gonna say if I really am pregnant."

"He'd be happy, I expect, because he obviously loves you a _lot_," Jessi replied, spearing another piece of lettuce on her plastic fork.

"I sure hope so, cos I really don't want him to freak out.. And I'm really sure that I am pregnant."

The rest of the meal was silent, and I finally grabbed the bag of pregnancy tests after throwing away my trash, and headed into the bathroom.

Ten minutes later, I went back into the bathroom to check the results.

"..Jessicaaaa!" I called out as my hands fell to my stomach for the second time that day. She stuck her head into the bathroom.

"Yeah?"

"..They all say _positive_."


	32. Chapter 32

**Chapter Thirty Two**

I pushed open the front door and made my way inside the house, and then closed it behind me as to keep the cool air inside.

I had just been to the doctor. I was five weeks and three days pregnant.

Deciding Aaron should probably know sooner than later, I picked up the phone and dialed the rehab center.

Five minutes later, I was driving out to see Aaron for the second time in two days.

When I pulled into the parking lot, I rested my head on the steering wheel as I tried to prepare myself to tell Aaron he was going to be a father whether he liked it or not. I sure hoped Aaron was ready to be a dad cos I wasn't exactly all too ready to become a mother at seventeen.

I got out of the car and pulled open the big glass doors. And, much to my expectations, Chris looked up from the desk and grinned at me. I smiled a small smile back and took my time to walk up to the desk, making sure I didn't make a repeat of yesterday.

"Well, well, well, I didn't expect to see you here again so soon," Chris said, his British accent making his grin even funnier.

"Yeah," I said, playing with the bottom of my shirt. "I really need to see Aaron."

"S'everything okay?" Chris questioned, his turquoise eyes probing mine.

"Yeah, everything's fine. I just need to see him."

"Mel, I'm gonna show her up to Sanchezz' room, m'kay?" he said over his shoulder to the same blonde girl as he had yesterday.

"Wasn't she here yesterday?" she inquired in the same British lilt, snapping her gum.

"Point?"

He took my arm and led me over to the elevators again. As we waited for the elevator to come, Chris turned to me and said,

"Are you positive everything's okay?"

and I jumped a little at the word _positive_.

"Yeah, everything's peachy-keen!" I laughed a little, my giggle sounding slightly manic, right as the elevator dinged.

Chris eyed me dubiously as we stepped into the elevator, but he didn't ask any more questions.

This time, he led me to room 267, and, once again, he knocked on the door.

"Yes?" Aaron asked in a monotone after opening the door. I leaned past Chris. "Oh! Caitlin. What're you doing here? I didn't expect to see you for a while."

"I felt like seeing you again," I replied, elbowing Chris. He took the hint and headed back to the elevators.

Aaron took my hand and pulled me inside the room and shut the door behind us. This time, instead of going out onto the balcony, we sat down on his bed, facing each other.

"Something's wrong," Aaron said, grabbing my hand and twirling my engagement ring around on my finger.

"Well, it's not really.. _wrong_," I said, picking at a loose thread on the comforter that covered Aaron's bed. "It's just.. a surprise, that's all." I looked up at Aaron. He looked worried, like I was about to tell him I had cancer or something.

"Well.. what's a surprise?" he asked.

"Well.. I went to the doctor this morning."

"..And..?"

"Aaron, I'm.." I took a deep breath. "I'm five weeks pregnant."

He was silent for a minute. "You're.. pregnant?"

"Yeah. You're gonna be a daddy." I looked back down and picked at the loose thread some more. Aaron put his fingers underneath my chin and made me look at him.

"Why're you so upset?"

"Cos.. I've sorta been through a bit of this before. Last time I got pregnant.. some kids pushed me down the stairs, and I lost the baby, and I don't want that to happen this time.. And.. what if I'm not a good mother?"

"Caitlin, you're going to be an absolutely amazing mother. You're one of the most caring people I've ever met. And fuck those kids. I won't let anyone hurt you, you know," Aaron said, his fingers still underneath my chin.

"But —" Aaron put his other finger over my lips.

"You won't be showing enough for anyone to know until at least October, or late September. I'm not gonna let anyone hurt you." He removed his finger from my lips and replaced it with his own.

When we parted, I said, "I guess you're right. I mean, I'm gonna be a mom." I thought about it for a minute, and felt a grin slowly creeping up my face. "I'm gonna be a mom," I repeated, my voice in a kind of surprised awe.

"Does this mean you're happy about it?" Aaron asked, finally releasing my chin from his grasp.

I nodded, and he kissed me again.

"I know this may be a really stupid question, considering you only found out this morning, but.. Do you have any name ideas?" Aaron smiled.

"Yeah, strangely. I've had baby names picked out since I was twelve." I'd spent a long time thinking up names when I found out I was pregnant for the first time.

Aaron moved to sit against his headboard, and I sat inbetween his legs after grabbing the notepad that was on his side table and a pen.

"Okay, boy names?"

"I only have two of those.. Kaydence Josh or Jared Ryan." Aaron thought these over.

"I like Kaydence Josh better than I like Jared Ryan." I agreed, and wrote it down. "Okay, girl names?"

"I have a lot of these, so be prepared." I took a deep breath. "Andrea Jane, Victoria June or Victoria Skye, Hayden Erica, Shanna or Jenna Justine, Savannah Leigh, Kaleigh Brieanne, Hayley Nichole, Chloe Anna, Vanessa Jane, Avery May or Elizabeth, Ashleigh Nichole, Samantha Mae, or Regan Michala."

"Good, God, that's a lot of names," Aaron laughed.

"Pick.. Seven of them."

"Hayden Erica, Andrea Jane, Ashleigh Nichole, Kaleigh Brieanne, Hayley Nichole, Victoria Skye, and.. Samantha Mae." I wrote all of those down.

"Which one's your favorite out of those seven?"

"Hayden Erica." I smiled.

"Same here." I looked down at the list. "Bejesus, we already have a name for a boy and a girl picked out. Well, that was easier than I expected."

Aaron chuckled and wrapped his arms around me. "Yeah, it was. I expected you to drone on for hours and hours." I punched him in the leg. "Ow."

"I love you, too," I giggled. "You know, I miss you a lot."

"How can you miss me when I'm right here?" He asked, kissing the top of my head.

"I mean, like, I miss sleeping next to you at night, and I miss when you touch me.. And I miss when you kiss me, and I miss all of our little bits of bickering.." I played with the necklace that was resting on my chest.

"I miss it too, but you won't have to miss it for long, cos I'm coming home in September, you know," Aaron said, squeezing me tighter.

"I really hope that August goes by fast, cos I want you home." I looked at him upside down because my head was on his chest. "I _really_ want you home."

Aaron rolled his eyes. "I know. I wanna be home, too." He slid his hands down over my tummy. "So, what does Jessi think of all this?"

"She's really happy for us. In fact, she's the one that bought me the tests. Cos after I left yesterday, she showed up at work for lunch and right after lunch, I threw up.. And when she left she asked me if I wanted her to bring anything home for dinner." I sneezed, and Aaron laughed. "And I asked Cody if I could get off work cos I'd thrown up, and on the way home, I realized that I was late.. And that lead to me calling Jessi and adding pregnancy tests to her items to bring home."

"How interesting." I hit his thigh again. "Ow. Must you abuse me all the time?"

"Yes, I must." I pulled out of Aaron's grasp and turned over in his lap so that I was facing him, and draped my arms around his neck. "I love you."

"I love you too, babe," he replied, and kissed my nose. I pouted. "You know I want to, but you know where that will lead, especially since we're on a bed."

I sighed. "I guess so.." An idea popped into my head, and I climbed off Aaron's lap and stood up. "Okay, now I'm on the floor." Aaron laughed and then hopped off his bed and stood in front of me.

"Okay, you'll get your kiss." I took his hands and placed them around my waist, and then draped my own around his neck. "Horny little person."

I rolled my eyes. "Says you."

"Yes, says me." Aaron cut off the retort I was about to shoot at him by kissing me forcefully.

We barely had time to pull apart as a slight knock on the door announced a nurse's arrival. I promptly turned the color of a tomato and pulled my hands away from Aaron, deciding that my toenails were much more interesting.

"Oh, am I interrupting something?" I looked up slightly and saw that the nurse, too, was blushing.

Aaron, not deciding to pretend, said, "Yes, yes you are."

"I'm sorry.. But.. Dr. Johnson needs to talk to you, and.." Aaron rolled his eyes and muttered something under his breath.

"Okay, tell her I'll be right there," he said, sounding exasperated. The nurse nodded and hurriedly left the room. I blinked.

"I could taste the awkward in the air," I said, finally removing my field of vision from my toes to Aaron's face. "Who's Dr. Johnson?"

"You know that show, _Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew _?" I nodded. "Yeah, we have those little one-on-one meetings and I have to go to mine." I frowned. "Hey, it's not like you'll never see me again."

"I know, I know." I stood on my tippy toes and kissed him. "I guess I'll let you go get your head shrunk."

"..Not funny."

"Yes. Yes funny." Aaron just rolled his eyes and lead me out of his room.

We had to part in the hallway, and I'm sure that none of the people who were in the corridor wanted to see me practically making out with my boyfriend, but hey, they can kiss my ass, and no, that isn't an invitation.


	33. Chapter 33

**Chapter Thirty Three**

I sighed, brushing my hair back and securing it into a ponytail, and then groaning and pulling it back out.

Today was the first day of senior year. I was about two and a half months pregnant, and I had to start the year without Aaron by my side. It'd be nice to see a few of my acquaintances again (considering I don't exactly have friends other than Jessi and Aaron) and to maybe touch base with a few of the teachers that I actually got along with and liked from last year. I just vaguely wondered what people would say and think when I started to show the fact that I was pregnant.

I straightened my purple _TWLOHA_ shirt and picked my brush back up, deciding to try another hair style, hoping I finished before it was time for me to head off to the hell that people call school.

Thirty minutes later, Jessi called upstairs, telling me to get my ass downstairs or be late. I came bounding down the stairs and nearly crashed right into her.

"You're gonna be late if you don't hurry up, you know." I pushed past Jessi and into the kitchen, grabbing a lemon poppy seed muffin and proceeding to shove it into my face.

"You know, I could care less if I were late," I muttered, popping open a can of Pepsi and swallowing half of it.

"I know, and that's what worries me." She rolled her eyes as she sat down at the table. "Pepsi and a muffin for breakfast? How healthy."

"Who are you, my mom?" I asked, sticking my tongue out at her.

"No, but when you're jittery all day because you drank a whole Pepsi before school, don't come complaining to me!" she laughed, picking up the newspaper and gluing her eyes to it.

"Oh, you know I will."

"Once again, I know."

I grabbed Aaron's car keys and slipped my flip flops on and threw the Pepsi can into the sink. As I was closing the door, Jessi called out

"Don't fall out of your shoes!"

and I called back,

"I can't make any promises!"

and headed to the car.

The drive to school was not a quiet one, seeing as I was busy rocking out like a total freak to Hollywood Undead.

I pulled into the school parking lot at exactly 8:10, and was met by the usual morning-back-to-school scene: Girls, squealing and hugging each other, jocks, throwing a football back and forth, and everyone else just blabbing and blabbing and _blabbing_.

I parked the car and got out reluctantly. I could immediately feel half the parking lot's eyes on me. I was guessing it was because I got out of Aaron's car and he didn't. I just ignored them and walked through the crowd and on into the building.

_ _ _

The day went by really fast, considering how many questions I got fired at me over where Aaron was. I just answered with the same thing over and over again. "He's at a relative's house because they're sick."

Before I decided to go home, I stopped by my language teacher from a year or so ago's room and knocked on her door.

To my relief, Mrs. Koster opened her door. She looked surprised to see me.

"Caitlin. And what brings me the pleasure of this visit?" She opened her door and gestured for me to come on in. I smiled and took careful steps as to not trip over the carpet in my flip flops.

"I just kinda felt like dropping by and saying hi," I said, curling up in a desk. Mrs. Koster turned another desk to face me and plopped down in it.

"Well, hello, then." She smiled, and I laughed, and remembered why I had always loved Mrs. Koster for a teacher. "I don't think the only reason you came in here was to say hi, was it?" I shook my head no. "Well?"

"I just really didn't know who else to talk to about any of the stuff that's going on in my head, or life, more like it.. I mean, I can't afford therapy, and I guess I could go to free counseling and stuff, but I'd rather not.. My life's been so hectic since my mom left—" Mrs. Koster held up her hand.

"Your mom left?" She sounded surprised.

"Yeah.. And that's for the better," I mumbled, twisting my fingers.

"For the better?"

"Yeah.. She used to beat me.. Hell, she beat me up until the day she took off to Florida with my little sister. I thought it was obvious." I looked up from my fingers to see Mrs. Koster with wide and sympathetic eyes.

"I didn't even know about the cutting until you told me last year, and I honestly don't know how I missed it." I saw her eyes flicker toward my arms. "Speaking of that, how's it going?"

For a second, I considered not letting her see the extensive damage I had done before school got out for the summer, but then I decided that she knows everything else, so.. why not? But, before showing her, I decided to warn her. "I tried to commit suicide a little before school got out.. and I attempted it by slicing myself to ribbons. The scars are really bad." I turned my arms over, and Mrs. Koster reached out a hand as if she was going to touch my arm like someone touches your shoulder to comfort you, but she thought twice about it and put it back on the desk.

Neither of us said anything for a moment, and then Mrs. Koster changed the subject. "Well, how was your first day back?"

"Okay, I guess. I'm not looking forward to more math or science, but I'm glad that I didn't have to take P.E. this year." Yeah, I don't have to take P.E. because I'm _pregnant_.

"But don't you guys have to take P.E. all four years of high school?" Mrs. Koster quirked an eyebrow, and I looked back down at the desk.

"I'm an exception to that," I muttered, picking at a hangnail.

"Why?"

"I'm pregnant," I said, not more than a whisper.

"You're what?"

"I'm pregnant," I said louder, still not looking up.

"Ah. And.. how'd that happen?" I blinked.

"Mrs. Koster, do you need me to explain how a baby is made?" I smirked.

"I think I have the basics down," she replied, a smile gracing her face, "but seriously, how'd that happen? I'd think that you of all people would know to take precautions." She referred to my early pregnancy at twelve.

I sighed. "Well.. I guess I was ovulating on my birthday, cos.. I got a birthday surprise from Aaron." I wiggled my finger so that the diamond on my finger caught the sunlight filtering through the windows. "And I figured out I was pregnant the day after Aaron's birthday."

"Well, what are you gonna do?"

"We're keeping the baby, of course. I mean, it's not exactly the _best_ household to bring a baby into, considering my problems and Aaron's problems, but.." I trailed off, picking at the black nail polish on my fingernails.

"Aaron's problems?"

"Well.. He's in rehab.. and.. he's trying to get over it.. I.. I don't really wanna talk about it. It doesn't feel like my secret to tell, you know?" I looked up at her, hoping she'd understand.

"Of course. You don't have to talk about anything you don't want to." She glanced at her watch. "Damn. I have to pick up my husband from work. His car broke down last night." I smirked a little when she said damn. Mrs. Koster was the teacher that cussed, and that just made her all the more awesome.

Mrs. Koster and I parted at the parking lot, and I drove home, ready to start in on the forms I had to fill out about myself like we had to fill out every year and to beat Jessica's ass at Guitar Hero.


	34. Chapter 34

**Chapter Thirty Four**

"Noooooooo!" I squealed, drawing out the _o_. "Stop tickling me!" I thrashed around, trying to get Aaron to relinquish his hold on me before I exploded from laughing.

He tickled me all over my abdomen and up my sides. "Never!"

"What did I ever do to you?!" I screamed, giggling hysterically.

"You breathe." I gasped and smacked his arm. "I'm kidding."

"That was still mean."

"It was something you would say." I rolled my eyes.

"Point proven."

Aaron finally stopped tickling me and pulled me into his lap. "So why are you here again?" I turned to him, my lip stuck out in a pout.

"Do you want me to leave?"

He hugged me close. "Of course not. I just wanted to know why you stopped by."

"Do I need a reason now?"

Aaron chuckled and pressed his lips to my neck. "No."

"Good.. But, there was a reason." I paused. "Will you help me with my homework?" He stopped kissing my neck, and I could practically hear the "WHAT?" in the air. "Hello?" I knocked on his head. "Is anyone home?"

"..You want me to help you with your homework?"

"Why is that so hard to believe? You're smart!" He just rolled his eyes. "Help me with my fucking trigonometry or die."

_ _ _

Two hours and several kisses later, my trigonetry was done, and currently we were laying on Aaron's bed and his hand was on my slowly growing tummy. I had a very small bump forming. My pants were just starting to get a little tight.

"Has anyone noticed anything?" he asked, tracing little shapes across my tummy.

"No, but I told Mrs. Koster last week. I told her a bunch of things last week, actually."

"Like?"

"I told her stuff that's been going on with me, and a little bit about you, and then I told her I was pregnant. It was a slightly awkward conversation."

"What'd she say?"

"She was a little surprised, but she didn't call me a slut or anything." Aaron snorted.

"I think she'd get fired or something if she called you a slut." I laughed.

"Nah. I'd call her a grosky old bitch and we'd laugh and get on with our lives." Aaron looked up at me.

"Wow."

"What?"

"You're crazy." I kissed the top of his head.

"You love me anyway."

"That, I do."

_ _ _

When I got home, Jessi was sitting on the living room floor with a pair of headphones on her belly. I stopped in the doorway and blinked a couple of times. Not weird at all.

I slugged my backpack onto the floor and hung my sweatshirt up in the closet, and then wrestled my Airwalks off my feet.

As I headed past the couch, Jessi looked up at me. "How's Aaron?"

"He's good.. He was blown away when I told him to help me do my trigonometry." She laughed and pushed the headphones farther onto her stomach. "So, uh, whatcha doin' there?"

"They say that the baby enjoys music when in the womb and it can help outside of the womb, too." I cocked my head to the side. "Also, playing classical music forces their brains to open up more synapsis to process the music because the notes are kind of erratic. It's supposed to help them retain information the older they get." I blinked.

"Alrighty then," I said, deciding that she had knocked a few screws loose this morning and headed into the kitchen for some water.

"You'll thank me later!" she called after me.

"Maybe I will, maybe I won't," I called back.

After getting my water, I sat down across from her. "So, what're you playing?"

"I'm playing a mix CD I found in your room." I blinked, and she hurriedly explained. "I was putting your laundry on the bed and I saw your CD case. I got curious." I rolled my eyes.

"You never answered my question."

"Right now I'm playing your bootlegged song "Where The Lines Overlap." I giggled nervously. "It's a really good song."

"Definitely."

For at least an hour we talked about music, and then we freaked out when the baby started kicking because I wanted to feel it. I pressed my hand to Jessi's tummy and felt the little foot nudge my hand. I gasped.

"Oh my God, that's so.. Wow." Jessi grinned at me.

"I know."

Man, I couldn't wait to have my baby.


	35. Chapter 35

**Chapter Thirty Five**

Before I even knew it, the months had migrated into September, and it was slowly starting to get colder, although not by much, but winter was coming faster than I wanted it to. Thankfully autumn was there to keep it at bay for a while. Before I knew it, Aaron would be coming home within a few short weeks, and I honestly couldn't wait. I bet he could, considering he would have to deal with questions and school and all of the joys that come with being eighteen when he got back, but I honestly hoped he couldn't wait to get back home.

"You know," I said to Jessi, measuring the lengths for my bag I was making in my sewing class, "I wonder if I could get Aaron to take me to the dance that's in December."

She looked up from the ice cream container she was digging into. "Good luck with that one, honey," she said, scraping the sides of it with her spoon. "I don't think that boy has danced a day in his life."

I sighed. "Oh, yes, he did, if you forget." I wiggled my finger that held my engagement ring.

"Except for that day. He's not really a _dance_ kind of guy, you know what I mean?"

I rolled my eyes. "I'm not really a _dance_ type of girl, either, but I loved dancing with him. It made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside." Jessi choked on her ice cream a little bit.

"Why do girls always say "warm and fuzzy inside" when they mean happy?" she asked, brandishing her spoon around.

"You're a girl. You answer that for yourself." She paused for a second. "Well?"

"Shut up."

"So much like your brother," I muttered, cutting out the shape for my bag.

"I'll pretend like I didn't hear that," Jessi replied.

_ _ _

While trying to pass the time between the day I was living and the day Aaron came home, I cleaned our room, worked my ass off, tried to stay up in my homework, and took a lot of walks and photography. Jessi was nearing seven months of pregnancy, and I was nearing three months.

On September fifteenth, I decided that, despite the fact that we weren't having a party or anything for Aaron when he got home (because he would probably kill us), I guess I should look nice, even though he'd seen me just a while ago.

After school, I decided to nip into the mall and see if I could find anything nice to wear. I flitted in and out of several stores, not finding exactly what I wanted, although along the way I had picked up quite a few things, including some new perfume and some nice lingerie that I'm sure Aaron will thoroughly enjoy.

Eventually, I found a nice enough shirt and some new makeup, and I decided that since Aaron (for some ungodly reason) liked me the way I was, I wouldn't get more than a little spritzed up.

When I got home, Jessi was lounged on the couch, reading a book called _Shutter Island_. She looked up as I came in through the door and set my bags down long enough to kick my flip flops off.

"And where have you been?"

"Shopping. I feel like looking nice for Aaron when he comes home." She turned the page in her book.

"But he always thinks you look nice." I could feel the heat rush to my face.

"_No one_ could think that I always look nice. Not even a blind man," I said, digging through my bags and finding the body spray I had bought. It was called _Butterfly Flower_. It had a shitty name, but it smelled like the good part of my childhood, if that made any sense at all.

Jessi just rolled her eyes. "So, what all did you buy there?" She dog-eared the page of her book and set it down beside her.

"I bought a really good body spray, some lingerie, some eyeliner, some new headphones, a new shirt, and.. yeah, that's it," I said, peering inside the two bags I brought home.

"Can I see the shirt?"

I dug around in the bag and pulled out a cute top that said "Smart Chick" on it with a pair of nerd glasses on the front. "How classy, right?"

"Oh, definitely. You could get into the Oscars with that thing." She picked her book up again and I headed upstairs to go take a shower and go to bed early.

Oh, Friday night—the best night there is because it leads up to Saturday, and Saturday brings Aaron coming home a day closer.


	36. Chapter 36

**Chapter Thirty Six**

On Monday, I woke up to my stomach being full of butterflies and the feeling that a kid has when they know they get to open their Christmas presents when their parents wake up lurking inside my body as the thought of Aaron coming home tonight plagued my first thoughts that morning. I knew that inside my head, I was beginning to sound like a crazed four year old, but I honestly could not keep my mind off of it. I couldn't wait to be able to snuggle up against Aaron in the middle of the night and know that I was safe in his arms.

Most of my day was a blur, and at the same time it seemed to drag on forever and ever. I was starting to think that time slows down when you can't wait for something that's going to happen _after_ school. It's like the laws of the universe or something, I tell you.

The second I got home, I raced upstairs to change and get ready.

As I looked into the mirror after applying my eyeliner, I had this sudden twinge of idiocy. Why, exactly, am I getting dressed up for a guy that tells me he loves me even if I look like I've been hit by a car?

"Well," I said out loud, sounding kind of crazy, "it's always nicer in a relationship when you've got a better view." I sighed, pulling my mascara wand out of the bottle. "Honestly, Caitlin, you need to stop talking to yourself. The neighbors are going to start calling the loony bin if you're not careful."

By the time five o'clock came around, I was bouncing around the house with excitement. Jessi wasn't at home because she was off to get Aaron, and I was home all alone. To occupy myself, I went around, meticulously organizing things until they were in perfect order. I blamed that on my mother for giving me god dammed obsessive-compulsive disorder.

In the midst of my organizing, pacing, and muttering, I got hit with a sudden wave of vertigo. Stumbling towards the couch, I hastily thought, _I really hope I don't puke. That would suck beyond words_.

I crashed onto the couch and closed my eyes, waiting for the wave after wave of nausea to stop and for the room to quit spinning. I guess while waiting for that to happen, I fell asleep like the smart person I really am deep down inside.

_ _ _

"..Caitlin.. Caitlin.." Someone shook my shoulder lightly. I lazily flapped my hand at them.

"Go away."

The person chuckled. "I don't really think you want me to do that." My heart skipped a beat, and I opened my eyes.

Aaron was sitting next to me, his face mere inches from my own.

"Aaron!" I squealed, propelling myself off the couch and tackling him to the ground and kissing his cheeks repeatedly. "You're home, you're home, you're home!"

"Yes, I am, now stop raping me!" I stopped the assault on his face.

"It's not rape," I paused, "if it's willing."

He grinned. "Damn, you caught me."

I sat up and crawled off of him and then helped him up to the best of my ability.

Wrapping my arms tightly around him, I said, "Do you wanna go upstairs and snuggle? I miss snuggles."

He sighed and rolled his eyes. "Sounds fun."

Jessi popped her head through the kitchen door. "If you two are going upstairs.. Please, please, keep it down. I really don't need to hear noises and receive mental images, thank you."

"We aren't going to do anything," Aaron said, smirking.

"Yeah, we're just going to snuggle."

Jessi's eyes flitted between me and Aaron. "Is that some new kind of slang or something?"

I was silent for a moment. "Wow. You really sound like a mom."

I hit Aaron's arm. "Ow."

"That's kind of the point," Jessica muttered, and went back to whatever it was she was doing.

I practically dragged Aaron upstairs and then nearly pinned him to the bed in the effort to get as close to him as I possibly could without melding us together in some creepy scientifical way. Aaron wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me close, burying his face into my shoulder while I kissed the top of his head.

"I missed you so much," I whispered, rubbing his back with my right hand and shivering slightly as his breath fanned out over my shoulder repeatedly.

"I missed you too." Aaron pressed a small kiss to the spot where my shoulder and neck connected. "Despite how much I saw you, I missed your voice, your hands, your body, your smell.. Your everything." My heart did a large somersault and skipped a few beats.

I kissed his head again. "Same here. Same here. I'm just so glad to have you home. I was getting kind of lonely here all alone with your sister."

"Did you just diss my sister?"

"I dunno if I did or not."

I could practically hear his eyes roll. "It doesn't bother me because I know how lonely it can be to just live with one other person. But, living with just you is amazing, so don't take that the wrong way." He kissed my shoulder again.

"I wasn't planning on it."

"Good."

After that, we stopped talking and just reveled in the nice comforting feeling of being whole again.


	37. i'll probably go back and edit this

**Chapter Thirty Seven**

_(sorry if this one gets a little weird at the bottom. i'm really tired and kinda dizzy xD)_

"Aaron," a voice in the distance called, "it's time to wake up." I didn't say anything; I just rolled over onto my stomach and covered my head with the pillow, which was then rudely yanked out of my hands. "Come on," the voice called again, which was accompanied by a light tap on my shoulder. "You need to take a shower before we can go."

I lifted my head and blinked groggily at Caitlin, who was bent down in front of me with her head cocked to the left. She smiled pleasantly, and I returned the look with a glare, and then covered my head with my arms.

"Aaron, I swear, if you don't get your ass out of this bed, I will jump on you."

"You wouldn't dare," I muttered, knowing full well that she probably would.

"You wanna try me?" she asked, her voice too innocent for my liking. I didn't answer, and the next thing I knew, my girlfriend had launched herself onto me and was clinging to me.

"Oof," I groaned. I lifted my head again, and was immediately drowned in her mass of brown hair.

"Please get up?"

"I am up," I replied, trying to get her hair off of my face.

"No you're not." Caitlin kissed my cheek. "But you're hella warm."

I blinked. "Since when do you say hella?"

She crawled off of me and pulled her PJ shorts back up. "I say it all the time. You just don't pay attention."

I rolled my eyes and sat up. "Do I really have to go to school? I just got back." I looped my arms around Caitlin's waist and pulled her onto my lap. "I was hoping that we could spend some alone time together." I pressed a small kiss to her back.

"As appealing as that sounds.." She wiggled out of my grip and traipsed over to the dresser and pulled open the top drawer and started digging around. "I have a test today and you really need to get your ass into school."

"But I don't wanna," I replied, sounding as annoying as a four year old denied of his candy. Caitlin turned around and placed her hands on her hips, cocking them to the left.

"Really?" I blinked. "Did you really just do that?"

"I don't know what you're talking about." She sighed and turned around, throwing a shirt over her shoulder at me and a pair of jean shorts. "Get in the shower and get _dressed_ before I pounce on you. Again."

I laid back on the bed and grinned when Caitlin turned back around. "Hey, I _want_ you to pounce on me, and I think you should know that by now considering what I said not more than five minutes ago."

She groaned and stalked off into the bathroom. "I give up!" I grinned and closed my eyes as I heard the water turn on.

About ten minutes later, a drop of water landed on my forehead and I opened my eyes to find myself face to face with Caitlin, of whom was bending over me, her hair sopping wet, wrapped in a towel. I blinked.

"You need to go take a shower," she said, not moving.

"You know, I could probably get clean if you just laid on me because I'm starting to think you brought the shower out here with you considering how soaked you are," I replied, trying not to let my eyes wander past her face.

"Oh, ha ha. You know I have a lot of hair." She leaned in to kiss me and I wrapped my hands around her waist and pulled her down on top of me. She squealed. "Let me go."

I moved a chunk of her sopping wet hair behind her ear. "We can be late, you know. First period is nothing important. We don't even have class first period."

She sighed and rested her forehead against mine. "I guess you're right.." She leaned in and pressed her lips to mine, which, considering what happened next, was a pretty bad idea.

_ _ _

I rolled over and looked at the clock. 2:14 PM. Caitlin wasn't going to be happy that we never did go to school, but at least she got something nice and something she wanted for a long time out of it.

I turned back to Caitlin, of whom was still sleeping, her arm draped over my hip and the blanket down around her waist. I brushed some stray hairs off of her face and pulled the blanket up over her shoulder. Her right hand was sticking out from under the pillow and her engagement ring was reflecting the sun that was filtering in through the windows.

I smiled and closed my eyes again, reveling in the greatness of actually being able to sleep for the first time in a long while.

_ _ _

I opened my eyes and was met by the sight of Aaron asleep next to me, and I smiled, not really wanting to move at all. But, since I was naked, I figured I should probably put on some clothes before Aaron woke up, or at least slip on a bra and some panties.

I slid out from under Aaron's arm that was holding me close to him and tiptoed to my dresser, quickly pulling on a bra, a pair of panties, and one of his oversized t-shirts, but not before examining my slowly growing belly. You couldn't tell I was pregnant yet; it looked like I was bloated more than anything else.

Instead of laying back down (which I really wanted to do), I headed downstairs and sat down on the couch and began channel surfing. Not long after that, I heard Aaron come clomping down the stairs. I looked back at him to see him rubbing his eyes with his hands.

"Had a nice nap, there, sleepy head?" I asked, curling my feet underneath me. He shuffled over to the couch and lay down, resting his head in my lap. I ran my fingers through his hair and he sighed. "What's wrong?"

"I don't feel good," he replied, playing with the fingers on my left hand.

"Like, your stomach hurts, you've got a headache..?"

"No, I just feel like utter shit." I pressed my hand to his forehead.

"You're a little bit warm, but I wouldn't really worry about it. Probably just a bad cold or something."

"Why do they call them colds if you can get them in the summer?" he muttered into my thigh. I shifted my legs so that he wouldn't suffocate in the flab on my legs.

"I don't know. Google it."

"That requires moving."

"God, you sound so much like me," I said, sliding down a little on the couch until Aaron's head was resting just above my stomach. I continued massaging his scalp. "Let's hope that if you get sick, I don't. I really do not need to be sick at this moment in time." Aaron didn't answer. He just lightly hit my leg with his hand. "I don't mean offense! Just don't get me sick."

"That's out of my control."

I rolled my eyes. "I know." I flipped through some more channels. "God, there is _nothing_ on tonight." Aaron mumbled something incoherent and I ignored him. Eventually I settled on Criminal Minds.

Aaron fell asleep on me halfway through.


	38. Chapter 38

**Chapter Thirty Eight**

Aaron slammed his head into his locker repeatedly until I pulled him away from it.

"I hate school, I hate school, I hate school," he muttered, grabbing some of my books from my hands. "People really need to stop asking me questions before I kill someone." I kissed his shoulder because it was the only thing I could reach at that moment.

"You know that they'll stop eventually. You're just some new excitement in their lives and it'll die down soon." He sighed.

"I know, but I'm getting sick of all the people talking to me, asking the same exact thing as the previous person." I held open the door for social studies as Aaron carried his and my books into the room and dropped them on our desks.

As people filed into the classroom, at least more than half of them took small glances at Aaron. I knew that the first day back in school would be rough and temper-triggering for Aaron but I didn't expect people to go so overboard with this. I mean, he's told about half (if not more) of the school that he had to go visit a relative in Florida or something and they're still talking about it like he was in jail for killing five people or something.

"Caitlin," Aaron whispered, poking my shoulder. "You're drilling a hole through your book."

I looked down to see that I was stabbing my social studies textbook with my pencil. I carefully removed the led jammed through the cover and placed it on my desk. Aaron stifled a laugh and I threw the pencil at him just as Mr. Carey walked in. He gave us a warning look and started preaching to us about some period in time that I could honestly care less about.

When lunch finally rolled around, we had the option to either eat inside or outside, and Aaron and I definitely picked outside. We lounged against the building with me spooned against Aaron. I raised my hand and pointed at the sky.

"I see a shape in the clouds. Do you see it?"

"Yeah," Aaron said, "I see this cloud that's shaped like a cloud." I flicked his leg. "Ow."

"No, I mean, other than a _cloud_, you dip shit. I see a whale." I yawned.

"I still only see clouds." I looked backwards at Aaron. "What?"

"You are such a simpleton."

"Don't insult me with big words."

"Simpleton is not a big word, Aaron." He patted my thighs.

"That may be so, but calling me stupid is a lot easier."

I decided not to pursue this any further before both of us became highly confused.

When the bell rang, I begrudgingly got up and headed towards P.E with Aaron close at hand. He had to go to "personal fitness" across the hall, but he was close enough to be able to hear me scream when something hit me.

"Caitlin," he said after we had stopped in the middle of the hallway, "don't get yourself killed or something, alright? When a ball comes at you, _duck."_

"Considering my luck with this kinda shit, _I think I know this already_." He just rolled his eyes and kissed my forehead before heading to the boy's locker room to change. I quickly changed in the bathroom stall and climbed the stairs to the gym.

I picked up a volleyball and started hitting it against the wall, trying hard not to miss and have to run to go get it.

"Hey, Evans!"

I turned to the sound of the voice and regretted it instantly when I felt a ball connect with my face. The next thing I felt was the impact of the gym floor.

The gym teacher, having dealt with this many a time before, just came over, grabbed me underneath my armpits, and dragged me off towards the bleachers where I would stay until the class was over.

Several times during the dodgeball game we had, I rolled off the bench in an effort to save myself and each time wound up causing more damage than I had even intended for. I wound up with three band-aids on my legs and an ice pack on my wrist.

Somewhere between the middle of class and the end of class I drifted off into a light doze, and was startled when Aaron shook my shoulder.

"Wha?" I muttered, slowly sitting up.

"I thought you said you understood how to duck," Aaron said, smoothing my hair back away from my forehead. I rubbed my eyes with the palms of my hands.

"I do. I just don't have eyes all over my head so I can see which direction the object is coming from," I muttered.

"Maybe we should attach a rear-view mirror to you," he suggested, helping me up. I gave him a death glare. "Okay, maybe not."

_ _ _

When Aaron and I got home, Jessi was in the kitchen, making pasta of all things.

I sat my bag down on the floor. "Why're you making spaghetti at.." I looked at the clock. "..3:47 PM?"

"Ever heard of pregnant woman cravings?" she said, stirring the noodles. Aaron rolled his eyes and headed upstairs. A few minutes later, I could hear the shower running. "So, how was school for him?" Jessi asked as I stretched.

"It was alright, I guess. He got really sick and tired of everyone asking him the same things over and over and over again. "Where were you? Why weren't you here? Where've you been?" I hopped up onto the counter. "It was the exact same question every time, just worded differently. At the end of the day before P.E, I thought he was going to rip his hair out." Jessi shook her head.

"Eventually people will find something else to freak out about."

"I know. That's what I told him. I mean, when everyone finds out I'm pregnant, the whole world is going to explode into a drama-fest, and neither I nor Aaron are looking forward to _that_ day." A loud noise came from upstairs, followed by a loud explicative from Aaron. I looked at Jessi, who didn't say anything. I sighed. "He's such a nerd."

After dinner, Jessi decided she wanted to spend the night at her apartment so she could get some more cleaning done because she hadn't really been there all too often lately, which left Aaron and I home alone for the entire night.

We were currently stretched out along the couch, Aaron underneath me and I on top of him, watching some movie that I didn't know the name of, and Aaron was being extremely tempting by running his fingers up and down my thigh every few minutes.

After at least an hour of this, I was wound tighter than a rubber band. Slowly, I reached upwards and pressed my lips to his, and he immediately responded by threading his fingers through my hair. It took less than a minute for him to slowly part my lips with his tongue and intertwine it with my own. I could tell that this would be a very fun night and that Jessi made a wise move in deciding to go to her apartment.


	39. It's short but it's a filler chapter

**Chapter Thirty Nine**

I glared out the window at the sky as it belched a few small flurries of snow onto the hood of Aaron's car. I hate snow.

It was now the middle of November and I was about five months pregnant and Jessi was almost nine months pregnant and due any day now. Everyone in school could tell by now that I was pregnant, but no one had given me any shit about it because I figure they knew Aaron would kill them if they did.

Currently, Aaron and I were up in our room and I was laying on the bed watching Aaron clean the floor because I didn't want to get on the floor and have trouble getting back up.

"Why am I doing this again?" he asked, haphazardly throwing our clothes into a pile that I was going to force him to lug to the washing machine.

"Because I'm fat and I can't get back up off the floor," I replied, watching him slide underneath the bed and drag out a giant pile of his shirts.

"You're not fat. You're pregnant." He threw them into the pile. "I had been looking for those."

"Sorry." I snickered. "You know, you look good cleaning."

He glared. "Don't push it." His eyes widened and he picked up the lingerie I bought a few days before he came home. "And why haven't I seen these before?" It was a very small lacy black and purple thong. I blushed.

"Maybe because I'm too fat to wear it right now?" Aaron sighed and threw the thong at me.

"You're not _fat_. You're _pregnant_."

"OH MY GOD, REALLY?" I shot the thong back at him and it hit him in the chest. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I'm not going through this again," he muttered, diving back under the bed.

I just laughed.

_ _ _

"Hey, Aaron?" I asked, twirling my pasta around on my fork. He looked at me as he stabbed his spaghetti repeatedly.

"Yes?"

"I.." I paused.

"Yes..?" he asked again, this time slower.

"I was wondering.."

"Will you get to the point already?" he asked, still stabbing his pasta.

"You know, on the 12th, there's a dance.." I continued twirling my fork.

"And you want me to take you?"

"Well, I've never really been to a dance before.." I could feel my face growing warmer.

"Why're you embarrassed to ask?" Aaron stopped stabbing his food.

"Because you don't seem to be a big dance kinda guy, and.. Blah, I don't know!"

"Caitlin, Caitlin, Caitlin," Aaron said, grabbing my hand. I looked up at him. "You shouldn't be embarrassed to ask me to take you to a dance, you know. It's not like I'm gonna say no or something."

"Well, I know you don't exactly like to dance and everything.. But I kinda wanted to experience a dance before I become a mother cos by the time prom rolls around, I'll be knee deep in baby diapers." Aaron laughed.

"Of course I'll take you."

"Yay." He rolled his eyes and let go of my hand. "How many plates of spaghetti have you eaten already?"

I paused with my fork halfway to my mouth. "Three?" He blinked.

"Jesus Christ."

"What? Our baby is going to be made of carbohydrates. Oh no." Aaron just rolled his eyes.


	40. Chapter 40

**Chapter Forty**

A loud scream came from downstairs, and Aaron bolted out of bed and I almost rolled off it. I sat up and brushed my bangs out of my face. A few minutes later, Aaron came bounding through the doorway.

"What the —" He cut me off.

"Jessica's water broke."

"Oh, Jesus Christ."

I clambered out of bed and grabbed a hoodie off the floor after throwing a shirt at Aaron.

"Where's her bag?" he asked.

"It doesn't matter. You can come get it later."

"SOMEONE GET DOWN HERE!" Jessi howled, and I pushed past Aaron and waddled down the stairs. Jessi was on the couch, trying to breathe through her first contraction.

"You're fine, you're fine," I told her, trying to pull her to her feet.

"I am not _fine_. Just get me the hell out of here and to the hospital, dammit! I am not having my son on your living room couch!"

"Alrighty then!" I said, finally getting her up. "I don't want you to have your son on my couch either!" I wrapped her arm around my shoulder and we both squeezed out the door and made our way to the car where Aaron was anxiously waiting.

When I finally shut the door to the backseat, Aaron was already pulling out of the driveway and Jessi was screaming,

"DRIVE, GOD DAMMIT, DRIVE!"

She had ahold of my hand, and she was squeezing my fingers so hard that they were folding in on each other. "Now, Jessi, come on. Let's work on our breathing. Deep breaths, in and out—"

"I don't want to breathe," she said in a low, dangerous tone. "I want drugs, and I want them_ now_." My eyes widened.

From the rearview mirror, I could see Aaron's face as he sped through a yellow light and almost hit another car. I resisted the urge to tell Aaron to slow down a little, but I'd rather not have Jessica gouge out my eyeballs.

"Breathe," I said to her. "Come on now."

"I'm scared," she said. "God dammit, it _hurts_."

I gripped her hand, trying to ignore the pain in my most-likely broken fingers. "Come on, Jessi, you know how to do this. Uh, peaceful thoughts. Oceans, and fields, and sunshine.."

"Shut up already!" she said. "God, listen to yourself."

I told myself that it wasn't Jessi talking; it was the pain talking. "Okay, fine," I said, "don't think about that. Uh, think about when we tease Aaron."

"Hey," he protested from the front seat. I ignored him and continued trying to remind her of things that were happy and didn't revolve around the fact that she was about to have a baby come bursting from her loins.

The lights of the hospital were coming closer and closer, and I could hear an ambulance somewhere off in the distance. I brushed the damp hair off of her forehead. "Hold on, Jessi. We're almost there, alright?" I bit my lip as she squeezed my hand again and I swear I felt the bones grind into dust.

"Don't leave me, okay?" she asked, panting. "Promise?"

"I won't," I said as we pulled into the parking lot, past the front entrance to _Emergency_. "I'll be right here."

They put Jessica into a wheelchair, shoved a bunch of papers into my hand, and pushed her through a set of double doors with a loud bang, leaving me and Aaron at Admitting, alone. Aaron went over to the chairs and sat down, putting his head between his knees, and I followed him with a clipboard and pen, beginning to fill out the forms as quickly and accurately as I could with the small help provided by Aaron.

I patted his knee and rushed up to Admitting, thrusting the forms at them and telling them I was her sister. For some odd reason, they believed me although I looked _nothing_ like her.

They led me through the double doors Jessi had been wheeled through not more than five minutes before and past the emergency-room cots against the walls to where they had Jessi on a bed with a monitor hooked up to her and already beeping.

"Where have you _been_?" she shrieked as soon as I came around the corner. She had a plastic cup of ice in her hand and a spotted hospital gown on, her clothes tossed haphazardly over the chair in the corner of the room. "I am having a conniption fit here, and you just vanish into thin air!"

"I didn't vanish," I said, tripping over my feet. "I was filling out the forms and making sure your brother didn't keel over in the middle of the waiting room."

"Well, good," she said. "Because we really don't need—" She stopped talking and sat up, holding her stomach. She let out a low groan, rising and rising in sound, and I just stared at her, not even recognizing her face, and knew all at once that in a little more than a few months, that was going to be me and I wasn't looking forward to this part.

The door opened behind me and the doctor came in, all cheery and joyful, taking her time to sidle up to the bed and giving Jessi, huffing and puffing through her contraction, time to grab my hand and cause bone to grind against bone once more.

"So," said the doctor, grabbing the chart off the end of the bed, "it looks like we're having a baby."

"We?" Jessi growled, "_we_? I don't see _you_ laying here with a watermelon trying to force it's way through you!" The doctor just smiled. "Will you give me some damn _drugs_ already?"

"In a minute," said the doctor, moving to the end of the bed and lifting the sheet, moving Jessi's legs into the stirrups attached to the sides of the bed. "We need to see have far dilated you are." She poked and prodded, causing Jessi to once more squeeze my hand until I saw spots dance in front of my eyes. "Alrighty." The doctor smiled and Jessi glared daggers. "You're getting close. Shouldn't be too long now. You just need to relax and work on your breathing. Leave the rest to us."

"What about the drugs?" Jessi asked, sounding a tad bit touched in the head. "Can I get the drugs?"

"I'll get those to you shortly," the doctor chirped, smiling at us like we were four year olds. "Don't worry, hon. It'll all be over before you can believe it." She placed the chart at the end of the bed and left the room, smiling as she went.

"I want to kill her," Jessi muttered through a mouthful of ice. "I mean it."

"Let's breathe, okay?" I said, changing the subject. "Deep breath in, alright?"

"I don't want to fucking breathe!" she snapped. "I want them to get me a damned epidural or at least knock me out with a two-by-four!" She gritted her teeth. "I can't do this. I can't."

"Jessi, you can," I said, wiping the hair off her forehead. "We can do this."

"Easy for _you_ to say." She sucked down some more ice. "All you have to do is tell me to breathe and stand there looking pretty. _You_ have the easy part." I didn't feel like reminding her that I was five months pregnant as it was.

"Jessi, hold it together."

She sat up in the bed, spitting shards of ice everywhere. "Don't you tell me to hold it together until you've felt this yourself, because it is unlike _anything_ in the—" She groaned again, her face going paler than it already was as another contraction slammed into her.

"Breathe," I said, doing it myself, breathing the familiar _hoo hoo, hee, hoo hoo, hee_. "Come on."

But Jessi wasn't breathing, only groaning again, the low scary noise that made me want to back away from the bed, literally scared for my life. I was wrong. _We weren't, and I wasn't, ready for this. _This was too much at once for a twenty year old, let alone a seventeen year old. I wished I was out in the waiting room with Aaron, freaking out alongside him, wondering what was going on in this exact room.

"Stay here," I told her, slowly backing away from the bed, step by step as she stopped groaning suddenly and watched me, her blue eyes wide. "I'll be—"

"Don't leave!" she cried, trying to sit up straight, reaching out for me. "Caitlin, don't leave!"

But I let the door swing shut behind me and I was suddenly alone in the corridor, the cool wall pressing against my back where my shirt was sliding up. I tried desperately to shake the fear of what was coming to me in a few short months off. I could hear Jessi on the other side of the door I was standing next to, screaming at the nurses to get her an epidural, and I was out here, having a nervous breakdown when she needed me most.

"Caitlin?" I looked up. Aaron was standing there, pale as hell. "What're you doing out here?"

"I can't do this," I said, my voice sounding strange and high pitched. "It's too crazy, and she's in pain, and I'm gonna be going through this, and—"

He cut me off. "Babe, you need to be in there."

"I can't," I said again. "It's too much to deal with."

"Well, that's too bad." I looked at him, surprised. "She may be my sister, but right now, she's counting on you and you're the only one she wants in there other than the nurses and doctors with the drugs."

"I'm no help. She doesn't really want me in there. I'm a mess. All she's using me for is something to hold onto and yell at right now," I protested, but Aaron was already pushing me in through the door.

"You are the _only_ one she wants in here," Aaron said, and then we were crossing the room, his hand clamped to my arm, back to the bed where Jessi was sitting up, clenching the sheet in her hands with tears streaming down her face.

Aaron didn't come much closer to the bed, probably in fear of his sister giving him a vasectomy with her bare hands.

"Don't leave me again," Jessi said, and I sat back down beside the bed and placed my hand back in hers. "I don't want to be alone."

"You won't be," I told her, glancing over at Aaron. "I promise."


	41. Chapter 41

**Chapter Forty One**

The doctor looked up at us, nodding. Aaron was over in the corner, not looking at either of us.

"Here it comes. I can see the head. Just a couple more big pushes, and you'll have yourself a baby, so get ready, alright?"

"Almost done," I whispered to her, squeezing her hand harder and mopping her forehead. "You're doing so much better than I will."

She didn't answer. Instead, she groaned.

"Give me another big push," the doctor called from the foot of the bed. "Get ready!"

"Breathe," I said to her, taking a deep breath for myself. "Breathe." I hoped Aaron would say something, but he looked like he was about to pass out, so I didn't say anything.

Jessi braced against me, her hand twisting mine, and I let out a little scream as she let out a loud groan as her face turned purple from pushing harder than she had the whole night, using up almost all of the strength she hadn't already exhausted.

"Here he comes, Jessica!" The doctor was smiling from the foot of the bed, her face excited. "Oh, come on, push once more, just a tiny one. Almost there.."

Jessi pushed again, gasping, and I watched as the doctor reached down with her hands, groping around, and then, suddenly, she was holding something, something small and red with kicking feet and a tiny mouth that opened to let out a tinny wail that was one of the most beautiful sounds I had ever heard.

"It's a baby boy," the doctor said, and the nurses began wiping him off and cleaning out his mouth. The placed him in Jessica's arms, and she was crying and looking at him with so much love in her eyes that it made my heart hurt. He had been with us all summer, and now he was here, in the flesh, as real as we were. I almost couldn't believe it.

Aaron had finally emerged from the corner of the room and was standing behind me, his hand on my shoulder.

"He's beautiful," I told her, smiling. "Hey, look, he has my eyes."

"And my hair," Jessi laughed, still crying, her hand brushing the top of the baby's head and the almost white fuzz there. "Look." She smiled up at me through her tears. "I'm going to name him Eric."

I looked up at Aaron, and he wiped a tear off my cheek that I hadn't known was there, and I smiled, knowing that, despite how much pain Jessi had been through for this moment to come, I couldn't wait until it was me in that hospital bed with my own baby in my arms.

Jessi was beaming, rocking Eric in her arms and kissing his tiny fingers, asking everyone in the room if they had honestly ever seen a more beautiful baby, and we all reassured her we hadn't.

After Jessi finally nodded off to a much needed sleep, Aaron and I slipped out of the room and headed to the cafeteria.

After buying a Pepsi and four Twix bars, I sat down across from Aaron and rested my forehead on the formica top. Aaron ran his fingers through my hair.

"You okay?"

I looked up at him. "Honestly?"

"Honestly."

"I dunno, really. I mean, after seeing the way that Jessi looked at Eric, I can't wait until we have our baby, but I mean.. I'm honestly _not_ looking forward to the pain _at_ all." Aaron leaned across the table and kissed my forehead.

"Caitlin, if women remembered the pain of childbirth, the human race would have died out a _long_ time ago." I gave him a quizzical look. It was times like these when Aaron was the strangest—when he spoke like I did. "What?"

"Nothing." I ripped open the first Twix package and unscrewed the lid to my soda. "Just nothing."


	42. Chapter 42

**Chapter Forty Two**

Jessi hadn't been over much since Eric was born, but that was alright considering how buried Aaron and I were in all of the homework that was being thrown at us for the joy that was senior year.

I smacked myself in the forehead with my Trigonometry book. Aaron yanked it out of my hands.

"Don't hit yourself." I rolled my eyes.

"Why not?"

"Because."

"Because isn't an answer, Mister."

Aaron slid closer to me and kissed my temple. I sighed. "Because you're beautiful and you just shouldn't hurt yourself." I looked up at him.

"How does beauty tie into this equation?" He brushed a stray lock of hair off my face.

"Because you're beautiful?" He made it sound like this was blatantly obvious. I opened my mouth to reply, but he placed his finger over my mouth. "Don't even say it because you know I'm going to win."

I was silent for a moment, and he took his finger off my mouth. "I'm not pretty," I said. He sighed.

"You're beautiful, baby girl." My heart skipped a beat. I knew that by now I should be getting over the heartbeat skipping, but I doubt I ever will.

"Baby girl?" He cupped his hand under my chin.

"Yes. You're my beautiful baby girl." I smiled. "I love you."

"I love you too, Aaron," I replied, leaning in and kissing him.

Eventually, we had to pull apart because we could both see where this would most likely lead to, and we still had mounds of homework to attempt to finish before tomorrow. Honestly, do they really expect you to finish thirty six hours of homework in one night?

_ _ _

"Oh, he's so _cute_," I squealed as Jessi put Eric into my arms. I ran my hand over the little dusting of blonde fuzz on top of his head and grinned up at Aaron. "He's so cute."

I looked back down at the baby in my arms and slowly rubbed my thumb over his cheek. He let out a small gurgling noise, and I beamed. Eric slowly opened his eyes, and looked at me with a bewildered look on his face.

"Hi," I whispered, knowing full well that he had no idea what I was actually saying. "I'm your Aunty Caitlin." He bubbled back at me, and I squealed. Aaron and Jessi were stifling laughs, and I glared up at them. Both covered it with a cough. "You two are lucky I'm holding a baby right now, or you'd be in for a world of hurt."

"We know, we know," Jessi said, patting the top of my head. I ignored the urge to bite her hand and instead told her how much Eric looked like her. She sat down next to me and slipped her index finger into his tiny hand. "It's so amazing, isn't it?"

"Which part?" I asked.

"All of it. I still can't fully grasp that this gorgeous thing came out of me. It's still a hard concept to grasp, you know?"

"Oh, yeah, I definitely know. I hope Kaydence or Hayden look more like Aaron, because if they do, they're guaranteed to be gorgeous babies." Jessi thwacked my arm, and Eric gave a little cry.

"You're quite beautiful yourself, so shut up." Aaron coughed in what sounded like agreement, and I sent him a glare over my shoulder, and then sighed.

"Well, if he or she at least gets his eyes, or at least his smile.. or nose.. or lips.." Jessi laughed.

"You mean all the things I don't really have?" I rolled my eyes.

"So, you got the Irish part of the gene pool. Don't be so disappointed." Eric started to fuss more, so I passed him back to Jessica. "I just hope our baby is happy, you know?"

"Why wouldn't they be?" Aaron piped up from the table in the kitchen.

"Hello?" I called back to him. "Look at who their mother is."

"Would you stop putting yourself down? You're not insane, no matter how much you believe it. You're fine," Aaron said, coming into the living room. "You're smart, beautiful, amazing, caring.. There's no reason why our kid wouldn't be happy." I sighed, and Jessi looked at both of us.

"He's right, you know." I groaned.

"Isn't he always?"


	43. Chapter 43

**Chapter Forty Three**

As I fastened the last bobby pin into my hair, Aaron came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my humongous waist and nuzzled my neck with his chin, causing me to pause with my hands still in my hair and sigh.

"You look beautiful, baby girl," he said, resting his hands atop my steadily growing baby bump (which was now more like a bulge than anything else). I looked at myself in the mirror, studying myself for a minute. For some reason, I felt oddly pretty tonight. It could have something to do with my gorgeous fiancé attached to my backside as of this moment, but it felt like a little more than that, and it confused me.

"I look oddly pretty tonight," I said, voicing the strange thoughts that were swirling around in my brain.

"You always look pretty," Aaron replied, kissing my neck.

"Aaron.."

"Yes?" he asked, his voice laced with innocence.

"If you don't stop that, you know where this will lead.. And those two hours I spent trying on dresses and the other two hours I spent on applying makeup and doing my hair will have been for nothing," I said, my voice slightly sing-song.

"Stop what?" he asked, continuing to leave little butterfly kisses all over my neck and shoulder.

"That."

"That?"

"Stop trying to seduce meeee," I cried, and he chuckled, pulling away.

"What would ever make you think I was trying to seduce you?" I raised my eyebrow. "I don't have to _try_."

"Someone's getting a little cocky, now, aren't they?" I leaned as close to the mirror as possible and touched up my eyeliner.

"I'm not even going to give a reply to that one," Aaron said, laughing, and I hit his arm. "What?"

"You horn-dog." I turned around. "How do I look? I mean, other than six months pregnant."

He laughed again. "You don't look six months pregnant." I stared down, not being able to see my feet.

"When you can't see your feet, you know you look six or more months pregnant, and I sure as hell cannot see my feet."

"You look amazing." Aaron leaned in and kissed me. "You ready to go to your first dance?"

I sighed. "No, but let's go anyways."

After we wrestled my shoes onto my fat-ass swollen feet, Aaron helped me to the car.

"Aaron, does this dress make me look fat?" I snickered as he gave me a "How the hell am I supposed to answer that without getting hit?" look as he pulled out of the driveway.

"You don't look fat. You never look fat." I rolled my eyes. "No, seriously. You don't."

I rested my hand atop my bump. "I really don't deserve you."

"I think you've got that one backwards, Caitlin." Aaron slowed to a stop at a stop sign, and then drove through the intersection. "I'm the one that doesn't deserve you."

"We're not going to get into this right now or I'll start crying and I'll mess up my makeup.." I dabbed at the corners of my eyes. Stupid pregnancy hormones.

"I'm sorry."

"For?"

"For making you cry."

I rolled my eyes. "Aaron, my hormones are on speed. It's not you, it's me." I paused for a second. "That sounded like a cheesy breakup line."

Aaron started laughing. "Wow. It's not you, it's my hormones. Haven't heard that one before."

"Can't say that anymore, now, can you?"

Around seven, Aaron and I pulled into the high school parking lot, which was covered with so many cars that it was an amazing feat that we could get through it without hitting anybody or anything.

When we got through the parking lot and to the front doors, I paused.

"What's wrong?"

"It's nothing, I'm just.. Kinda excited and kinda nervous all at the same time." Aaron kissed my cheek.

"Why? It's just a winter dance."

"I know, but it's the first one I've ever been to." I laughed. "I sound stupid, don't I?"

"No, you sound like a pregnant woman." I smacked his arm. "Ow. You hit like one too."

"Alrighty, let's go."

When we got inside the school, I was immediately assaulted by the smell of about twelve different things. Popcorn, pretzels, chips, about seven different baked goods, a load of pop, and _chocolate_. It was a pregnant woman (and a fat kid)'s wet dream.

From my peripheral vision, I could see the weird look Aaron was giving me, and I don't blame him for giving me that look.

"Hang on," I told him, heading over to the baked goods table.

I came back five minutes later, inhaling brownies as fast as I could. Aaron was laughing so hard he had to hold onto the wall for support. I glared, and that only made him laugh harder.

"What?" I asked, taking a sip of Pepsi. "It's _chocolate_!"

"I know," he said, still laughing. "But you looked like you had just won the lottery when you saw that stack of brownies." I glared again, and he grinned.

"Maybe that's because I felt like I had won the lottery." I sniffed reproachfully. "And now you don't get a brownie."

"I don't need one," he said, wrapping his arm around my waist as I waddled along beside him. "I've already got my treat right here."

"That was so corny, Aaron. So, so corny."

"You still love me, right?" I kissed his shoulder because that was the only thing I could reach.

"No, I hate you."

"I hate you more."

"I don't think that's possible."

"Well, then, think again."

The inside of the gymnasium was loud as hell and decked out in a bunch of tacky streamers, disco balls, and millions of blue and white decorations for a "winter" theme. If this was a winter theme, then my name is Hayley Williams.


	44. Chapter 44

**Chapter Forty Four**

The dance was finally starting to wind down after four hours of nonstop gyrating bodies covering the floor, and I was honestly exhausted as hell. Pregnant women don't belong at school dances. I did feel highly accomplished, though. I managed to get Aaron to dance with me a total of ten times. Jessica wasn't going to believe it when I told her.

Aaron came over to where I was sitting on the bleachers and handed me a cup of Sprite. I took a sip and looked at him.

"What?" he asked, the plastic red cup halfway to his mouth.

"Nothing," I replied, downing the entire cup.

"Tell me." I rested my hands on my stomach as two blonde bimbos walked by, giving me the "dirty whore" look that I knew too well.

"Why?" Aaron sighed, sounding slightly frustrated.

"Why not?"

I picked at a spot on my dress. "It'll sound weird." Aaron furrowed his brow, and I gave an exasperated sigh. "I dunno. It's just nice to feel like, well, a normal teenager, aside from the fact that I'm slowly turning into the Goodyear Blimp." Aaron opened his mouth to contradict me, but I glared, and he decided against it. Instead, he asked,

"What do you mean, 'nice to feel like a normal teenager?' You are a normal teenager. Well, almost." He took a sip of whatever was in his own cup. I looked at him, bewildered. "What?"

"Normal? Are you delusional?" I paused. "Wait, yes, you are, but still. I'm _not_ normal."

"Yes, you are. And what do you mean, I'm delusional?" Aaron set his now-empty cup down on the bleacher behind him and turned to look at me. "I'm not delusional."

I blinked. "_Hello_?"

"Yes?"

"You're dating the crazy pregnant chick! You are delusional!"

Aaron rolled his eyes. "First, you're not crazy, you're just touched in the head. And second, you're only pregnant _because of me_, if you've forgotten." I could feel the heat rush into my cheeks. "Why're you blushing?"

"Because I'm not forgetting." A cheshire grin broke out across Aaron's face. "Shut up, Aaron."

"I didn't say anything."

"I can read your mind, dammit!"

"You are not Edward Cullen, Caitlin."

"What?" I asked, dumbfounded.

"You heard me."

"Aaron, never say anything related to _Twilight_ again. Please. It just doesn't seem right coming out of your mouth."

"I only said it cos it's the first thing that popped into my mind." He paused. "And you're right. It sounds strange. Fine. You're no mind reader and don't even try and tell me you're psychic."

"I'm not psychic. I just see the future." He did a _facepalm_ and I laughed.

_ _ _

I started to feel queasy, so Aaron and I left a tad bit early.

I sighed and leaned my head back against the headrest. Aaron squeezed my hand.

"You okay?"

I took a deep breath. "Yeah, I'm fine. My stomach just hurts, that's all."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I'm positive." He squeezed my hand again.

The rest of the ride was quiet, and we were home before I even knew it.

Aaron ushered me upstairs, barely even giving me time to take off my shoes, and practically took my dress off and put my pj's on me.

"Aaron, I'm nauseated, not a quadriplegic." He sighed, handing my shorts to me as I finished pulling one of his t-shirts over my head.

"Yeah, I know, I'm just worried about you, that's all." He brushed some of the hair that had fallen across my eyes and kissed my forehead. Secretly, I was worried too, but I didn't feel the need to share it.


	45. Chapter 45

**Chapter Forty Five**

The next day, I felt much, much better, but Aaron was still bein_g _paranoid about the queasiness I had felt last night.

"Aaron," I said after he asked me how I was feeling for the umpteenth time that day, "I'm _fine_!" He frowned. And, as he opened his mouth to no doubt ask if I was sure, I said, "I'm POSITIVE."

"Okay, okay, I get it, I get it," he replied, heading into the kitchen.

I sighed, and his head popped into the doorway.

"Are you—"

"I'M FINE!"

His head disappeared from the doorway, and it was silent for a moment. I caught the faint hint of a muttered, "Jeesh, pregnant women are scary."

"I heard that," I replied, trying not to laugh. Aaron came back into the living room with a glass of water.

"..I didn't say anything." He sipped nonchalantly at his water and sat down not all that close to me. I turned to stare at him.

"Boo." He blinked once, and raised his left eyebrow. "Am I scary?"

"What're you talkin' about?"

"I would think that by now you know that pregnant women are scary, Aaron," I laughed, finally letting loose.

"Shut up," he muttered as I continued to laugh.

The laughing was cut short when a sharp pain shot through my stomach, and I winced. Aaron looked like he nearly had a heart attack right then and there.

"I'm fine," I said, breathing through it.

"You are not fine."

"Aaron, it's nothing." I winced again. "It's just Braxton Hicks contractions." I think all he heard was the word 'contractions,' because he started spouting off at a million miles per hour that I was only six months along and that this shouldn't be happening. I leaned over and I covered his mouth. "Braxton Hicks contractions are _false labor_. Alright? I'm not going into labor, and I'm fine."

I pulled my hand away from his mouth as another pain shot through my stomach.

"Are you sure?"

"Aaron, it's okay. They'll go away soon enough."

It took at least an hour for them to stop, but, as I said, they would, the finally went away, leaving me, sore, and Aaron even more worried than before. I tried to soothe his anxiety repeatedly, but I finally decided he was going to be strung out for a few days until I could prove that I was completely okay.

_ _ _

On Monday, Aaron and I skipped school like the rebels we are.

Currently, we were sitting on the floor in front of the couch, talking about anything that really came to mind. At the moment, we were talking about the baby.

"Aaron?" I asked, resting my head back on his chest and looking up at him.

"Hm?" He rested his hands on my quickly-growing tummy.

"For my next ultra-sound, do you want to know the baby's gender or not? Cos.. I really wanna know. I don't think I can wait four more months."

"Are you sure? I thought you wanted to wait and see."

"I know I did, but I still wanna know. Like, really bad. But I'm sure that there's a baby girl buried in all this.. whale." Aaron kissed my forehead.

"You're not a whale. You're—"

"Pregnant, I know. Blah, blah, blah." I switched subjects. "When do you want to have the wedding?" He seemed taken aback for a second.

"What made you bring that up?"

"Well, we haven't really talked about it at all, you know?" I said, twirling my ring around on my finger. "And, well, we can technically get married in like, Kansas or something right now because I'm pregnant, but I want Hayden in the wedding." I smiled at the thought of our baby girl, toddling around in a little dress, a grin plastered on her little cherub face.

He kissed the top of my head. "That would be nice."

"You know, I would love to have her be a flower girl if I could wait that long."

"She would be so cute." Aaron kissed me again. He was in a very loving mood today. "Then again, of course she's gonna be cute. She's your baby."

"I think you helped with that one," I replied, lifting my hand up and tapping his cheek. He grinned down at me, and I puckered my lips. He gladly took the invitation.

Upside down kisses are slightly strange, but nice as hell all the same.


	46. Chapter 46

**Chapter Forty Six**

I waddled into school through the blue double doors and ignored the millions of eyes that always turned to stare at me every day. Didn't they have anything better to do than stare at a pregnant girl?

I kicked my locker and it popped open. I hung my bag on the locker door and pulled my folders, binders, and books out of it and tried my best to get them all in there. Aaron had stayed home today (oh, yay) because he had the migraine from hell. Seven and a half months pregnant, and still counting on her boyfriend to help get her through the day. How pathetic.

Grabbing my writing folder and math binder, I headed off to first period, waddling as I went. I could already tell that my day was going to be long, slow, and no fun at all. I had no idea how right I was.

First and second period went by without any real annoyance except for the normal whispers of "whore," "slut," and "hooker." I didn't pay any attention, once again.

By the time third period rolled around, I was beginning to contract a migraine of my own.

"Okay, everyone, you'll need your science notebook and something to write with," Mrs. Simpson said, climbing on Sara's desk and turning on the LCD projector that was mounted on the ceiling. A collective groan circled around the room, as did the shuffling of papers and the crash of twenty five binders hitting the floor. "Oh, hush."

I hated taking notes even more than usual because it required being hunched over to take notes (I have to write with my face close to the desk for some reason) and I could barely fit in the desk as it was.

I begrudgingly got out my pen and notebook, which was falling apart before my eyes, and tossed them on my desk. Halfway through, I realized I _really_ had to pee. I grabbed my passbook and wrote one in, and then made my way over to Mrs. Simpson. She signed it, not very happy with me, and told me to hurry back.

"Hurry back my ass," I muttered, closing the door behind me and shuffling to the bathroom as fast as possible.

On the way back, a sharp pain shot through my lower abdomen. It felt like cramps. I leaned against the whitewashed brick wall and took a few deep breaths, waiting for it to pass. Another one quickly kicked in. They didn't feel like the Braxton Hicks I had a few weeks previous.

Eventually, they stopped long enough for me to start walking again. I paused, realization dawning upon me as my shorts got wet.

My water broke.

I screamed, and my legs started to shake. I was a month and a half early. Nearly two months. I'm not supposed to be going into labor.

Mrs. Koster came flying out of her classroom door. She took one look at me and my now dark shorts, shaking legs, and the tears running down my face, and knew what was happening. She muttered a curse and pulled her cell phone out of her pocket.

"Mrs. Koster—" She cut me off by holding up her hand.

I heard the phone ask "911, what is your emergency?" and Mrs. Koster started rattling off the address of the school and what was going on. She flipped the phone closed and put her arm around my shoulder.

"Caitlin, it's gonna be okay," she said, walking me in the direction of the nurses office. "Come on, breathe."

"But I'm only seven and a half months," I protested, shaking from head to toe. "I'm not supposed to be in labor!"

"I know," she murmured, opening the door to the office, "I know. But you gotta calm down."

She put me in a chair, and then flitted around the secretary to call Aaron, I assumed. Everything was a complete and total blur for me.

What if there's something wrong with the baby? What if one or both of us don't make it? What about Aaron? Why did this happen?

_ _ _

The phone's shrill ring sounded throughout the house, causing my head to pound in response, and I muttered, "Shut the fuck up." It continued to ring, and I got out of bed and stomped down the stairs. Who the hell would call in the middle of the day? I picked it up.

"What?" I snapped.

"Aaron?" a female voice asked on the other end.

"What?" I asked again, rubbing my temple.

"Caitlin's water broke."

I blinked. "Excuse me?"

"Caitlin's water broke. You need to get to the hospital."

I glanced at the clock. It was only 10:53. "Are you sure?" I asked.

"Yes, I'm sure."

"But she's only seven and a half months pregnant."

"I know. Hurry to the hospital, alright? The ambulance is here."

I hung up the phone and put on my shoes, grabbed my car keys and cellphone, and headed out the door.


	47. Chapter 47

**Chapter Forty Seven**

Once I was in the ambulance, I had an oxygen mask put over my face as another contraction hit. I screwed my eyes shut in pain and took deep breaths, exactly like the paramedic instructed me to. It hurt _so bad_.

It didn't take long until I was being wheeled into the hospital on a gurney, screaming my head off. After I was in my room, they practically cut my shorts off of me and tore my shirt off, quickly dressing me in a hospital gown.

The next ten minutes consisted of me, trying not to scream my head off with contractions and the doctors, telling me to 'just breathe' to which I responded with a loud "FUCK YOU!"

Aaron showed up not long after, and he looked like he was honestly about to pass out. He obviously didn't do well with babies, women, and labor all at once.

"Are you okay?" He asked, sitting down next to my bed. I fixed him with a glare that could curdle milk.

"DO I LOOK LIKE I'M OKAY?"

He didn't answer, and instead placed his hand in mine, knowing full well that I was probably going to break it in the next five minutes. Hell, I think the entire _world_ knew I would probably break his hand in the next five minutes.

Another contraction hit, and I squeezed my eyes shut and started panting.

"It's gonna be okay," Aaron said, sounding like he was in pain from somewhere to my left. I had to resist the urge to squeeze his hand harder than I already was. The pain was excruciating.

"And I thought my cramps were bad," I muttered, relaxing as the contraction passed. Aaron muttered a quiet "_Fuck_" when I let go of his hand. I turned to look at him, and I extended an arm out. Knowing full well I'd probably attack him, he slid closer anyway. "You know, I think it will be okay." He stared back.

"You sure?"

"Yeah. I mean, despite the fact that I'm way too early, I think Hayden's gonna be fine." Aaron leaned over and pressed a kiss to my sweaty forehead. I looked up as the doctor came in.

"Do you do _everything_ in this damn place?" I asked Dr. Smith. She smiled, sliding on some latex rubber gloves. Instead of answering my question, she bent down and pulled up the sheet that was covering me from the waist down and poked and prodded. I winced in pain.

"Alright, you're three and a half centimeters dilated. Do you want your epidural?" I looked at her as if she was nuts.

"Why do you guys even _ask_ that? OF COURSE I WANT MY EPIDURAL!" I screamed, sitting up in the bed, and then screaming in pain as the worst contraction yet hit me like a sack of potatoes.

"Just get her the damn drugs," Aaron said, rubbing his temples with his index fingers.

"Listen to the man!" I squealed, holding my belly and groaning. Dr. Smith scuttled out of the room as fast as possible.

After they gave me my epidural, I was in labor for another six, excruciating hours. I gave birth to a beautiful, healthy but amazingly tiny, baby girl named Hayden Erica Sanchezz.


	48. Chapter 48

**Chapter Forty Eight**

"God, she's so small," I murmured as Hayden closed her teeny fist around my index finger. I looked up at Aaron, who was standing next to my bed and staring at Hayden with all the love in the world. In my arms, Hayden squeaked mid-yawn and closed her eyes. I thought I was going to cry.

"Get some sleep," Aaron said, leaning down and kissing my forehead and then Hayden's. "You both deserve it." No truer words had ever been spoken.

I yawned. Why are they so catching? "Alright. I love you."

"Love you too."

I closed my eyes and ran my thumb over Hayden's little hand.

"When do we get to take her home?" Aaron asked the doctor.

"Well, we'll need to see if she needs a ventilator to help her breathe because she's a pre-me. It shouldn't be all that long because she's pretty healthy." I smiled at the thought of having my baby girl in my arms at home, and drifted into a light slumber with that thought on my mind.

_ _ _

"Aaronnnnnn," I whined, hanging over the back of the couch and staring at him through the kitchen door, "I'm hungryyyyyyy." I could hear the chop of a knife on the cutting board.

He sighed. "What do you want?"

"Are you on the menu?" I asked, grinning. He turned around and rolled his eyes at me. "Fine, I'll take a salad." I flopped back down on the couch and rested my hands on my tummy, which was slowly getting smaller. Hayden was still at the hospital, and she was on a ventilator because her lungs are so small. I jumped when Aaron set my salad bowl on my stomach.

"You alright?"

"Yeah, I just miss Hayden." I moved my feet so Aaron could sit down. He rubbed his hand over my knee because that was all he could reach at the current moment in time.

"I know. I miss her too, but we'll have her home before you know it." He smiled, and I stabbed my salad. "Don't take out your frustration on the salad. It didn't do anything to you."

"How do you know?" I asked, brandishing the fork at him. He leaned away. "There are some things you just don't know, Aaron."

He raised his eyebrow. "Are you PMSing or something?"

I glared. "How should I know?"

"You're the girl?"

"Oh my Jesus, really? Thank you for telling me that." I set my bowl down on the floor.

"You didn't even touch that," Aaron said, pointing at the bowl on the floor. I picked it back up and shoved a forkful of lettuce in my mouth. "Alright, that's better."

I finished chewing. "Lettuce. Yum."

"You're so weird."

"Meh."

**Shitty chapter, I know. I apologize. DX**


	49. Chapter 49

**Chapter Forty Nine**

Aaron was pissed that I wouldn't let him come with me to get Hayden from the hospital, but he had already missed so much school already this year that I really didn't want him to miss anymore. I did feel kind of bad that he wouldn't be there to take her home, but since today was an early release day, it wouldn't surprise me if he was home before I was.

"Caitlin, come on," Aaron pleaded as I put his calculus book into his book bag. "It's just a half day. Hell, it isn't even _half_ the day!" I zipped it and handed it to him.

"Aaron, you've missed nearly forty days because of rehab and then the days when I needed you and when we skipped because we're idiots.. You can't afford to miss any more or you won't graduate on time. We aren't even supposed to miss more than fourteen days but we both were an exception." I put my hand on my stomach, which was still a little bigger than I'd really like it to be. "You need to go, okay? You'll probably be home before we are."

Aaron sighed. "Fine, fine, fine. God, you sound like a mother," he muttered, grabbing his bag from me.

"I am a mother, remember?" I followed him to the door and handed him his shoes. He sat down on the back of the couch and pulled them on.

"Yeah, I know. And I'm a father, remember?" I stepped in between his legs and placed my arms around his neck.

"You know I love you, right?" I asked, resting my forehead against his. He placed his hands on my hips.

"Of course I do." He kissed my nose. "I just wish I could be there."

"I know. But you'll get to see her as soon as possible."

"That's not soon enough." I kissed his lips.

"It makes me smile at how much you already love her." I laughed. "I don't even want to _think_ about the day she announces she has a crush on a boy." He frowned.

"Neither do I." I kissed him again, and backed away. He pouted.

"Come on, get going or you're going to be tardy."

"Now you sound like a teacher," he muttered, opening the door.

"I want to be a teacher."

"How surprising." I rolled my eyes and kissed him.

"Love you."

"Love you too," he said, and shut the door behind him.

Aaron was leaving me the car today because I _obviously_ needed it. I glanced at the clock and groaned. It was only 8:02 and they told me to come at 10:30. This was going to be a tedious two hours.

For the kazillionth time in what seemed like twelve seconds, I dog-eared the page in my book and glanced at the clock, and nearly flew out of my chair when I realized that it was 9:47.

I dashed up the stairs, nearly killing myself in the process, and changed my shirt from a Coors Light beer shirt into something at least presentable in public. I don't know why I was so nervous. It's not like Hayden's going to remember the moment I brought her home. I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair. It was pretty much untamable today, so I pulled it back in a claw clip.

Five minutes later, I was in the car and on my way to the hospital as fast as I could without breaking the speed limit by more than a little bit. I really didn't feel like getting a ticket today, or any day for that matter.

To my surprise, a woman was actually waiting for me when I entered the NICU.

"Are you Caitlin?" a clipboard armed brunette asked me nearly the second I walked in. I blinked in surprise and brushed a stray hair behind my ear.

"Um, yes?" Why did that sound like a question and not an answer?

She grinned a blinding white smile at me. "My name is Cindy. Follow me." _Someone _has invested in a lot of dental care.

I followed her back through a set of double doors and into the nicest NICU I had ever seen in my life. The floors were a mix of hardwood and tile, and the walls were cream. The curtains were a multi-colored orange. It looked really, really expensive. I swallowed. Was this going to be hella expensive?

"Hayden's over here," Cindy said, leading me over to the last spot in the NICU. As I looked around, I realized how insanely _small_ some of the babies were. All of the tubes that were hooked up to the beds they were in were intimidating. "She's doing really well. She started breathing on her own about three days ago."

Hayden was in one of the beds, but without the box-like top over it. She was also tube-free, which made me fill with such happiness that I felt like I would combust. Her dark brown eyes were wide open, and she was surveying the ceiling as if it were the most amazing thing she had ever seen. It may or may not have been. She had a full head of light brown hair.

By the look Cindy gave me, I could guess that my entire face had light up. "Can I hold her?"

"Of course."

I leaned over the bed, and Hayden switched her view towards me. A smile came across her face and she cooed. I nearly squealed with joy.

Sliding my hand underneath her head and the other underneath her small torso, and picked her up. She was so _light_. I cradled her in my right arm and held out my index finger to her. She grabbed it with her teeny tan fist and blinked at me.

"Hey, baby girl," I said, wiggling my hand a little. She smiled. "Who's a pretty baby?"

Cindy cleared her throat from somewhere next to me. I looked up, and I felt my cheeks grow slightly warm. "Are you a single mother or no?" I looked at her for a moment. "Sorry, I'm just wondering. I haven't had the privilege of meeting a teen mom yet."

"Privilege? I wouldn't exactly call it a _privilege_, but I'm actually engaged." I kissed Hayden's forehead. It was warm. "He's at school right now, and he's kinda pissed that he couldn't be here for this."

"I don't blame him," Cindy said, laughing lightly.

"Do you have kids?" I asked her, tapping Hayden's nose lightly and watching her mouth turn up in a toothless grin.

"Not yet, but I really want a daughter."

"I would have taken a boy or a girl. The only problem with boy babies is that they can pee in the air." I laughed. "I don't really want to have to dive for cover every time I change a diaper."

"True." Cindy sighed. "Well, I guess I should let you be on your way."

"It was nice meeting you though," I replied. "Where do I check out or whatever it is?"

"Follow me."

After waiting nearly fifteen minutes to sign out, I was finally in the car and Hayden was safely in the back seat. I was beyond paranoid before, but having Hayden in the car made me feel the need to look behind me every five seconds to make sure she was still okay. If I'm this bad, I don't even want to _think_ about how paranoid Aaron will be.


	50. Chapter 50

**Chapter Fifty**

Aaron practically plowed the door down when he got home at 1:30. I almost fell off the couch. Thank God I didn't, considering I happened to be feeding Hayden at that particular moment in time.

"God dammit, man!" I shouted, and Hayden jumped in my arms. I bounced my arms a little. "If I had fallen on the floor.. I would have killed you, I swear to God." I glared at him, and he smiled in the _I-Love-You-Don't-Kill-Me_ way that he had. I rolled my eyes. Aaron deposited his bag on the floor and kicked off his shoes. "So, you wanna see your baby girl?"

"Which one?" he asked, walking around the couch and sitting down on my left side. Hayden looked over at him, still sucking on the little pink bottle that was in my hand. She blinked once, her golden eyes widening. Aaron was silent for a moment. "She's so beautiful."

"Isn't she?" He mimicked my movements from earlier; he stuck his large index finger out and she wrapped her little fist around it. Their skin tones were nearly identical. "She's got your eyes and your nose."

"Yeah, but she looks like you." He kissed my cheek and I smiled. "God, she's so tiny." Hayden made a little noise as she finished the end of her bottle. I picked the towel off the back of the couch and draped it over my shoulder, and held her against me, tapping her back until she made a small noise that signified that she had burped. "Can I hold her?"

I looked at Aaron incredulously. "Do you really think you have to ask? She's your daughter, too, you know." He smiled and touched her teeny foot, which was snuggled in a pink bootie.

"I know, but still. You're holding her and I don't want to intrude." If I weren't holding Hayden, I would have hit him upside the head for being such a neanderthal. "What?" he asked as I stared at him like he had twelve eyes.

"Intrude? Seriously. She's your daughter, too!"

"Well, if she is, then could I please hold her?" Aaron held his hands out, and I transferred Hayden to Aaron's arms. "She's so light." Aaron leaned back against the couch, and I lay my head on his shoulder.

"I know." I wiped my eyes. "How did something so beautiful come out of _me_?" Aaron kissed the top of my head, and Hayden watched us intently. I smiled through the tears that were filling my eyes. "I don't fully understand it. I mean, I obviously understand the whole _conception_ part of it, but I mean, she's so.. _beautiful_."

"So are you," Aaron murmured against my hair. "You really shouldn't put yourself down like that." I held Hayden's tiny fist. "I think that Hayden is proof that you're beautiful, Caitlin." The tears spilled over and I wiped my eyes once more. "Don't cry."

"They're happy tears, Aaron," I replied, smiling and pressing a kiss to his shoulder. Hayden made a small noise of protest. I couldn't be certain, but I think that she could maybe sense that I was crying. "Shh," I said, rubbing my thumb over the top of her hand. She closed her eyes and bubbled a little. I giggled.

Aaron and I watched Hayden drift off into a deep sleep, both of us at ease.

"I'm gonna take her upstairs, alright?" Aaron said, moving slowly as to not wake the sleeping baby in his arms.

"Alright. I'll be right here," I told him as he stood up and headed towards our bedroom, which now had a crib nestled against one wall.

As Aaron disappeared upstairs, I sniffled as I felt the tears coming on again. It didn't take more than a few seconds for me to be full on crying. I wiped at my eyes furiously, hoping that I could stop by the time that Aaron got back downstairs. I knew exactly why I was crying, but I didn't really want Aaron to know why because he'd berate me for thinking like that.

I closed my eyes and rested my elbows on my knees, putting my face in my hands. I took a few deep breaths, trying to calm down. I jumped when Aaron's voice came from next to me; I hadn't realized he'd come back down stairs.

"What's wrong?" he asked, crouching down in front of me. I didn't answer him. "Caitlin.. Babe, what's wrong?" He put his hands around my wrists and pulled my hands away from my face. "Why are you crying?"

"I don't want to tell you." I saw the same look I had seen the time he left for school that day cross his eyes.. "Aaron, no, it's not like that."

"Then why won't you tell me?" I sighed deeply.

"Aaron.. Hayden doesn't deserve to have someone like me as a mother." He frowned and opened his mouth to speak, but I pressed on. "What if.. What if she winds up like me, Aaron?"

"That's not going to happen."

"How can you be sure? I mean, it's obvious that I have clinical depression. What do I tell her when she gets older? Her mom's arms are covered in a million scars! I can't let her be like me. I wouldn't wish that upon anyone." Aaron wiped my tears with his thumbs and then cupped my cheeks in his hands.

"Listen to me, Caitlin. There's nothing wrong with you. _Nothing_. You have depression. So what? It's not something you could stop. It's not your fault." I closed my eyes. "Look at me. So you have scars. So what? You deal with your depression in not the best of ways, but for the most part, it's out of your control. Yeah, you're doing better, but you never know when you're going to slip up again." He wiped the fresh onslaught of tears that came forward. "Don't worry about it right now. You won't need to explain it for another several years to come." I nodded, and he kissed my forehead and pulled me into his lap. I rested my head on his shoulder and cried while he rubbed my back. I really did hope it would be as good as he said it would.

• • •

"Hey, pretty baby," I whispered, looking into Hayden's crib where she was asleep, her little chest rising and falling with every breath she took. Aaron was asleep in the bed behind me, for he had school in the morning, as well as a test in trig.

I glanced at the clock. The bright LED numbers read 3:07 AM. I sighed, looking back down at my baby girl. She slept as normally as a newborn could. She rarely woke up before 6 AM, and for the most part, she slept through the night. It was like a miracle.

Aaron mumbled from behind me, "Caitlin..?"

"I'm right here," I said, blowing a kiss to Hayden and making my way back over to the bed where Aaron was blindly groping the blankets next to him. He lifted his head and blinked groggily at me.

"Where'd you go?"

"Bathroom." I climbed in next to him and pressed a kiss to his forehead. "But I'm right here." He wrapped his arm tightly around my waist and pulled me close. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah," he said, mumbling into my neck. "I'm fine. Just go back to sleep." I kissed his forehead again and closed my eyes. It didn't take much more than a few minutes for him to go back to sleep. I still couldn't believe that I had someone who cared for me as much as he did. I honestly didn't deserve it.


	51. Chapter 51

**Chapter Fifty One**

I looked at Caitlin with a bewildered expression on my face, and she just grinned.

"What?" she asked.

"You are so.. fucking weird," I replied, staring at her. Caitlin was sitting on the ground, her legs spread eagle, and Hayden was between them. She had ahold of Hayden's hands and she was moving them up and down. Apparently, she was "dancing," as Caitlin put it. But the weirdest part was the _song_. "Are you _sure_ that this is the music you want to bring our daughter up to?"

_Now this looks like a job for me, so everybody, just follow me cos we need a little controversy. Cos it feels so empty without me._

"Hello? Do you see how happy she is?" Caitlin said, rapping along. Hayden was smiling a humungous, toothless smile. "Who cares what song it is?"

"You will when she's in kindergarten, skipping through the halls and singing Eminem and Hollywood Undead," I pointed out, shaking my head.

"Nah. When she learns all of the words to Without Me, I will put a gold star on her forehead." I blinked.

"You're crazy."

"Nah. Mrs. Koster would be proud." Caitlin grinned at me, and I rolled my eyes.

Too weird for words, she is.

• • •

"We're the ones who made you!" I sang, moving Hayden along with the music. She was squealing up a storm, and Aaron was looking at us like we were retarded purple hippos walking on our hands. "You're just jealous," I said to him.

"..No, not really," he replied, still staring.

"Yes, really. You wish it was _you_ who was in between these legs, my darling." He coughed. "Aha, that's what she said."

"Oh, jeez," Aaron muttered, hitting his forehead with his palm repeatedly.

"Hey, don't give yourself a brain hemorrhage. We can't afford any more doctor bills, mister." He hit himself harder. "You are mean."

Aaron stuck his tongue out at me. "You're a loser."

"I hate you."

"I hate you more."

"I highly doubt that."

"You shouldn't."

"Shut up, Aaron." He grinned.

"Make me."

"I would if there weren't a baby in front of me." Hayden had stopped smiling and she was watching Aaron and I like a tennis match. "Oh, she's definitely my child. She learns so fast." I picked her up and hugged her, causing her to squeak.

"Alrighty then.." Aaron got up and headed into the kitchen. "Do you want anything?"

"Yes," I called back, bouncing to the music.

"Could you tell me what it is? I'm not a mind reader, you know."

"You."

"I'm sorry, that's not on the menu at this moment in time."

"Smart ass!" Aaron laughed.

"You know you love me."

"And your ass, too."

Aaron walked back into the living room and leaned over the couch. "You're such a horn-dog." I stuck my tongue out at him. "God, Hayden is going to have such a sailor's mouth growing up in this house. We both say fuck way too much."

"Fuck, fuck, fuckety fuck-fuck-fuck," I replied, grinning.

"I give up."

• • •

"Hey, Aaron?" I said, looking up at him as I put Hayden down in her rocker. She was half asleep already.

"Yeah?"

"We still need to talk about the wedding." He looked up from channel surfing on the couch.

"What brought this on?"

"Well, the last time we really mentioned it was when I was still pregnant, and considering that Hayden's already three months old and summer is steadily approaching and graduation is looming ever closer, we should probably start talking about it." Aaron turned off the TV and moved over so that I could sit down next to him.

"Start talking then," he said, looking at me.

I grabbed the notebook that was on the side table. "Well, where do you want to have the wedding?"

"Didn't we already say the meadow by the bridge or something?" I pondered this for a few minutes.

"I don't remember, but I think that's a great idea." I jotted it down on the page. "Remember, I really want Hayden to be in the wedding, so it will have to be at least next summer when we're both 18. I don't want it in July because it's so damn _hot_. I'm thinking either late May, early June."

"Sounds good to me."

"I want to make sure we have a lot of pictures so that I can make slideshows and stuff for the reception."

"Don't we already have a million pictures?" Aaron laughed, and I glared.

"A million isn't enough!"

"You're insane."

"You love me." I set the notebook and pen down and I yawned. "I'm so tired."

Aaron pulled me into his lap and kissed the spot between my neck and shoulder. "How come?" I shivered.

"I don't know." He continued kissing over my shoulder, and pushed the strap of my tank top down. "You're driving me crazy." I could feel his lips turn up in a smile against my skin.

"What if that was the point?" he mumbled against my shoulder.

"Then you are an evil, evil person.." Aaron slid his hands slowly down my arms and then down my sides. "Such a tease." He slipped his hands underneath of my shirt.

"You love it."

"Did I ever say I didn't?" I shuddered. He smirked and continued kissing my neck.

"No, and I can tell that you love it." He slid his hands higher up.

"And I can tell you do too," I replied, my voice slightly strained. He chuckled, and his breath fanned out over my shoulder. "Oh, you're evil."

"I love you too."

"I know." I smiled.


	52. Chapter 52

**Chapter Fifty Two**

"Aaron, will you get me a Kleenex?" I asked him, bouncing Hayden on my lap. "Her nose is running really bad again."

"It's the end of May. How in the hell did she get a cold?" he muttered, plopping a box of tissues on the couch next to me. "And, better yet, how in the hell did she give it to _me_?"

"Your immune system is shit," I told Aaron, patting his knee. He glared at me, and I ignored him, wiping Hayden's nose. She sneezed, pretty much making the fact that I had just wiped her nose pointless.

"Are you mad that we're missing graduation today?" Aaron asked, wrapping my black fleece blanket around him and closing his eyes. He honestly looked like crap. Poor thing.

"No. I mean, hell, I didn't even really want to go anyway. A million hours trapped in a gym that feels like a furnace? No thank you. They will mail our diplomas to us." I paused. "Diploma. That sounds weird."

"What, the word, or the fact that we're getting them?"

"Is both an answer?" I said, as Hayden began babbling. I rolled my eyes. Strange child.

"I feel like I'm dying." Aaron sneezed, and I handed him the box of Kleenex. "Thank you."

"I have the feeling that we're all about to get sick, thanks to this little ball of sickness on my lap named Hayden." She looked up at the sound of her name and grinned. I sniffled. "Oh, God. And the torture begins."

• • •

I sneezed again, and Hayden sneezed after me. Aaron glared at us both. "I swear to God, I'm going to _condemn_ you," I said to her, and she blinked at me. "Oh, don't give me that innocent look!" I blew my nose. "You're an evil, _evil_ baby!"

She cooed in response and clapped her hands, and sneezed again. I wiped her nose and then wiped my own. Aaron was trying not to sneeze for as long as possible, considering the fact that he had gotten the worst part of the evil cold that was trying to kill us all.

"Aaron, are you hungry at all?" I asked, setting Hayden down on her fluffy pink blanket. "I'll make you some soup if you want me to."

"No. The thought of food makes me want to hurl." He covered his mouth and visibly paled.

"I'm starting to think that you have the flu and not just a cold."

"Kill me," he muttered, cocooning himself in the black blanket he had on his lap even tighter around himself. "Please."

"Are you serious? Do you really think I can kill you? Not happening, Aaron."

"I hate you," he mumbled. I crawled into the chair and kissed his forehead.

"I love you too."

"Gaaaaaah!" Hayden squealed, sneezing again. I rolled my eyes and took her into the kitchen to warm her up a bottle and _maybe_ spoon-feed her some warm chicken broth.

I hate sick children. It sucks.

I shuffled outside into the furnace that we called a June day in this state. I yanked open the mailbox that was shoved into the brown dirt at the end of our driveway. Aaron and I's diplomas were furled up, a blue ribbon tied around each of them. I grinned. Huzzah! I was officially out of high school. It took me thirteen long years, but I finally did it and I made it out alive.


	53. Chapter 53

**Chapter Fifty Three**

Aaron was currently at the grocery store. I had forced him to go and take Hayden along. He wasn't happy about it, considering it was his first time grocery shopping with her ever, and he was also alone. But I needed just a little bit of alone time. Don't get me wrong, I love my daughter and my fiance beyond any words that could ever describe it, but I kinda felt like I needed to breathe.

On walking through the kitchen, I glanced at the calendar. Two days until I was eighteen. Yay me. I frowned, confused at why I didn't have the enthusiasm I thought that I would upon the fact that I could get married legally in 48 hours time.

I jumped when the phone belted a shrill ring throughout the house, and I shuffled over towards it, not glancing at the caller ID.

"Hello?" I mumbled, walking back into the kitchen to get a cold bottle of water.

"So, you're about to be eighteen, eh?" I fumbled with the phone as I tried not to drop it in the sink.

It was my mother.

"What's it to you?" I shot back, immediately taking a defensive stance in my words.

"It's nothing to me. Can't a mother call her own daughter before the big one-eight?" my mother said, her voice a cool drawl.

My mother was of Hispanic decent, and, against all of my wishes, she was gorgeous in that freaky-ass MILF way that made me want to gag up my breakfast.

"Last time I checked, you weren't my mother. I just happened to pop out of your ovaries." I tapped my fingers rhythmically on the stainless steel sink basin. I could practically hear the ice in my mother's breath.

"Be lucky I even own up to that."

"I'd rather you not."

"So, gotten pregnant yet?" I rolled my eyes.

"Yeah, I have, thanks. She's about four and a half months old and she's gorgeous." My voice swelled with the love for my daughter. "Oh, and I'm engaged."

"Always knew you'd get knocked up."

"Yeah. Sadly, I'm like you in more ways than one."

"How much did you have to pay the father to buy you a ring and to fuck you, eh?" She snapped.

I pressed _end_ on the phone, and immediately found the number for our phone company. I was changing the house phone number as soon as I could.

• • •

"She _what_?" Aaron practically screamed, and I covered his mouth with my hand, gesturing wildly towards the sleeping infant in the backseat of the car.

"She asked me how much I paid you to fuck and propose to me," I repeated, unhooking Hayden's baby seat and carefully lifting her into my arms as Aaron followed me into the house, his arms laden with groceries.

"Can I kill her?" he muttered, trying to hold open the white front door for me. "What gives her the right to say that to you?"

"Who said she'd ever wait for the right to say it to me?" I replied, heading into the living room to lay Hayden down in her playpen so that she could continue her nap in peace for as long as possible. "She's always been a vulgar bitch. You know that." I padded back into the kitchen, where Aaron was pulling things out of plastic bags.

"Doesn't mean she should have said it." I pulled the bag that had the bread in it away from him before he could smush it any further.

"Calm down, Aaron. I'm used to it." I started putting cans and boxes into the cupboards. I jumped when his arms encircled my waist and his chin nestled against the crook of my neck.

"You _shouldn't_ be used to it. It's not right." I set the box of pasta down and put my hands over his large ones.

"I know it isn't, but I _am_ used to it, and you can't change the past." I turned my head and kissed the upper part of his cheek. "I love you, Aaron."

"Te amo," he mumbled into my neck, and I giggled. "Hm?"

"That tickles." Aaron kissed my neck. "Ah." I could feel his lips twist up into a smile. "And that feels really good."

"What about this?" he asked, pressing light kisses to my neck and shoulder. I shivered and twisted out of his grip. He pouted.

"Come on. We have groceries to put away, mister."


	54. Sorry It's Short

**Chapter Fifty Four**

"Hey, Jessi," I asked, trying to cradle the phone between my ear and shoulder and bounce my daughter on my knee at the same time without injuring anything, "do you think that I could go to college?"

"Why do you think that you _couldn't_ go to college?" she replied, sounding confused from the other side of the line.

"Well, I'm not smart, I'm not rich, I have a kid—" Hayden squeaked "—and I'm _me, _you know? I don't really want to deal with twenty five years of student loans to pay off, either. Or a baby sitter."

"You're smart, who cares if you're rich, you have Aaron for a 'baby sitter', and you should go to college _because_ you're you." I rolled my eyes. "I'm serious. Don't roll your eyes at me."

"No wonder you scare Aaron."

"Haha, very funny. Listen, I gotta go. Eric's.. being difficult. Love you!"

"Love you, too. Tell him Aunty Caitlin says hi!"

"I will!"

I looked down at Hayden, who was still being bounced on my lap. Her mouth was open, and her entire face was jiggling.

"What _are_ you doing to that baby now?"

"Yah-yah-yah-yah-yah," Hayden shouted in time with the bouncing, and Aaron just stared.

"I blame that one.. on you," I muttered, wiping her mouth with my sleeve and passing Aaron his daughter.

"Why me? What did I do?"

"You breathe."

"Oh, that was cold." He feigned hurt, and I rolled my eyes. "So, who were you on the phone with?"

"Your sister." I stretched and let out a loud yawn, accompanied by several odd noises. Aaron ignored this.

"About?"

"College."

"Are you thinking about going?" I picked at my fingernails.

"I don't know. I don't really know if I want a huge student loan under my belt." Aaron leaned over and kissed my cheek.

"It's up to you."

"That wasn't any help."


	55. Chapter 55

**Chapter 55**

A dull pain shot across the back of my eyes, annoying and unpleasant. I could feel a migraine coming on.

Rubbing my temples, I sat up in bed and squinted my eyes against the morning light that was filtering in through the window. "Damn Earth rotation," I mumbled quietly.

"You alright?" I jumped. Aaron had just come out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist, drying his short brown hair. "You don't look so good."

"Why thank you," I grumbled, getting to my feet and nearly tripping over a stuffed block. "I just have a headache, that's all. It should go away in a while." I rubbed my nose. "Is Hayden up yet?"

"I fed her about an hour ago, and then she fell back asleep. She's really sleepy today." I scooched over to Aaron and wrapped my arms around his waist. "You sure you're okay?" I closed my eyes and lay my head against his chest. His lips were soft against the top of my head.

"Yeah. I just don't feel good.. Tired." He rubbed circles in the middle of my back. I sighed deeply.

"Caitlin.." His voice held a hint of warning, like he knew I wasn't telling him something.

"Aaron, really, I promise you. I'm fine. And if I'm not—" I felt him tense "—I will be, okay? It's just an early morning thing today. I'll be fine." I kissed his breastbone. "I promise you."

"You better promise me, dammit." He kissed my head again. I raised up from his chest and pressed my lips against his. They were warm. His hands cupped my face, and his thumb stroked my cheek. I slid one hand down to his waist and led the other one up to his neck and draped it over his shoulder.

Before anything else could happen, Hayden gave a cry, and we parted so that I could get my daughter out of her crib and Aaron could finish getting dressed.

Hayden cried into my ear, not making the headache situation any better as I rubbed her back and headed downstairs to warm up a small bottle and start our day.

"Shhh, baby girl, it's okay. Mommy's getting your food. Calm down," I told her, despite the fact that she really didn't give a damn.

I filled the bottle with formula and shook it as fast as I could without sending it flying across my kitchen, and then put it on the bottle warmer I splurged for.

Bouncing Hayden up and down for about a minute was quite hard, seeing as she was about 9 pounds now, which was great since she started out at about 5. But it's kind of hard to bounce 9 pounds up and down on your hip for a minute straight while it screams in your ear for a bottle of goop.

"Do you need help?" Aaron asked from behind me, and I jumped.

"Yes," I said, handing him his daughter and grabbing the bottle, shaking it and making sure it wasn't too hot. "Will you please feed her?"

"Of course."

As Aaron set off into the living room with a now quiet baby who was gladly sucking on the bottle, I began to make breakfast for Aaron and I. Eggs and pancakes, here we come.

Aaron pulled me close to him and I relaxed against his warm body, keeping my eye on the bouncer next to me that Hayden was sleeping in.

The sun was slowly setting, and there was a nice, warm breeze fluttering through the trees in the backyard. I laced my fingers through Aaron's and squeezed his hand.

"I love you, Aaron."

"I love you too, Caitlin."

"Did you ever think that we'd come this far, you and I? From hating each other to having a beautiful baby girl and being engaged.. Through everything?"

"Since the day you called me an asshole," he replied, and kissed my head."

I closed my eyes and let the warm breeze carry me away.


End file.
